


The Wings Were in the Way

by Gedry



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels Have Visible Wings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-11
Updated: 2017-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-31 17:20:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 36
Words: 72,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12686706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gedry/pseuds/Gedry
Summary: Inter species dating is complicated. The beginning and continuation of a not so normal relationship.





	1. Chapter 1

Angels are just a fact of life. They are a constant in the world like every other living thing. Dean works with them, sees them at the grocery store, hell, he even dated one once. Though he isn’t sure if a few days of flirting and quick role in the back seat of the impala count as dating. Still it sounds better than casual sex. Anyway, Dean is used to seeing angels. He’s just not used to them seeing him. Not really. 

Angels are dicks. No really, they are. Well groomed, professional, arrogant, holier than thou dicks. They walk (and fly) around like they own the place. Looking down their collective three piece suit noses at everyone who doesn’t have giant fluffy wings growing out of their shoulder blades. Anna was a slight exception to the rule but only because she was going through a much abbreviated rebellious period, culminating with Dean in the impala and then Dean waking up alone in a ditch. He leaves that part of the story out when he tells the tale. 

So he is understandably more than a little shocked when the new guy at the salvage yard slides out from under the tow truck with torn jeans, no shirt, three days worth of scruffy facial hair, and wings. WTF? It’s not just the fact that he has them that’s so weird, it’s that they are dirty. There are oil stains on the underside like the guy wiped his hands on them after taking out an engine. The way the feathers stand up in all different directions. Never in all of his life has Dean ever seen and angel look less than impeccable. This one looks like a bomb went off and he tried to stop the blast with his wings. 

“Dean. DEAN!” 

Bobby Singer is a hard working son of a bitch. He never sleeps and seems to think nobody else has to either. And he is yelling which in most jobs would be worrisome but here is just another day at the office. 

“Boy, have you heard anything I just said?”

“Um, no…”

“That” He says, pointing at the crazy Unabomber looking angel across the yard. “is Castiel. Show him around.” And after that enlightening bit of information Bobby is off to yell at Chuck and probably Becky who Dean is pretty sure are making out in the office, again. It must be Thursday. 

Dean strolls across to Castiel. Who has turned at some point during his brief and loud conversation with Bobby to watch his approach. As he gets closer Dean watches Castiel tip his head to the side while he stares at Dean like Dean is the freak here. Like he is looking at parts of Dean that his body doesn’t show. That’s another thing Dean has always hated about angels. When they feel like it they can look right into your soul. 

Dean’s soul is not something he is 100% comfortable with.

“I’m Dean Winchester.” 

“Castiel” Their handshake is brief but leaves a trail of fire up Dean’s arm. That overheated zing he has gotten every time he touches an Angel. 

“Bobby asked me to show you around. Do you want the ten cent or fifty cent tour?”   
There is that head tilt again. The angel’s eyes narrow like he thinks Dean is speaking a different language. Then it’s gone and a small smile tips the side of his mouth. 

“What I would like is some help removing the parts from this truck. I’ve been working on it for over an hour and have yet to make any significant progress.” 

It is months later before Dean realizes that from day one Castiel, rumpled up angel of the lord, played him. A tour around the salvage yard would have been uncomfortable and strained for both of them. But working on a vehicle engages his mind and Dean slides under the truck, assess the angels work, and is up to his elbows in truck parts in less than five minutes. An hour later their conversation has moved on from “Hand me that wrench.” To “Where do you want to go for lunch?” They end their first day with a feeling of accomplishment and Dean drives home with a pleasant feeling of warmth swirling in his stomach. 

It is a week later, after several tow truck rides together, a week full of shared lunches, and fairly constant conversation that Dean says “Night Cas!’ as he walks off the yard and realizes that for the first time in his adult life he has a friend. He spends his weekend pretty much like normal. He cleans up the apartment, watches some movies, burns some more albums for Sammy, whose college is in the middle of nowhere and gets no good radio reception. On their annual Sunday morning phone call Deal finds himself telling his brother about his week, and his weird, angel/friend. Sam’s response of “Sounds like you’re pretty happy, Dean.” Should have set off alarms for him then. Sammy is more aware of those inner personal emotions than Dean and he has been concerned that Dean leads too solitary of a life. 

By Monday morning Dean’s trying to work out how you ask and angel if they have a phone number. After all Sunday night Dean had wanted to go out for a burger or something and it wasn’t until then that he realized he had no idea how to contact Cas unless they were both at work. Over lunch he stutters through “So, umm, I was wondering, you know, if you ever wanted to hang out, um after work or something. And I don’t have you’re a…number, assuming you have one, because maybe you don’t and..”

“862-8792. Are you going to eat those fries?” and suddenly, having a friend doesn’t seem so hard. 

Accidents happen. Even to good people. Dean isn’t sure when Cas stopped being an angel in his mind and started being just a man, just his best friend. It’s a Thursday, Dean hates Thursdays, too close to the weekend without actually being the weekend. He and Cas have plans to go to some concert Cas is excited about. It’s not Dean’s type of thing but sometimes you make sacrifices. After all Cas sat through monster night at the old movie theater with Dean when he clearly would have rather been sleeping. It’s what friends do. Cas is currently in the dirt again under a bus that has an axel issue. He’s halfway through the removal process when the jack holding the bus up slips and tips everything toward him. Dean’s whole world stops for a moment; he hears his blood rushing in his ears. But instead of being crushed Cas grabs the bottom of the bus and shoves. Tipping the bus back up and off of him long enough for Bobby to slide the jack back in place. Dean hears his own exhale long and ragged leaving his chest. His shoulders drop and the world starts to move again. Angels are strong sons of bitches. Then the halfway removed axel slips out of where Cas had been trying to remove it and falls. Dean jerks; the loud noise jolting him and thinks That was a close one. Until he hears Cas screaming and Bobby yelling at him to help. When he reaches them Dean realizes that the axel would have missed anyone else but instead landed on Cas’s right wing. 

Cas is jerking trying to get away from the axel pinning his wing down. He is screaming so loudly that Dean is sure his ears are bleeding. He does the only thing he can think to do sliding under the bus almost on top of his friend and clamping his hand over Cas’s mouth. Cas’s eyes snap open and focus on Dean. Tears leaking out of his eyes to roll into the dirt. Dean uses his body weight to pin the wing in place. Whispering words of nonsense and comfort to his friend who quiets enough that Dean can hear him begging in a low torn voice 

“Please Dean. Please. It hurts. It HURTS.” 

It feels like forever until the paramedics come and they get to emergency room. The wing is broken in two places with a long gash and missing feathers on the underside where the axel cut into it. They say they don’t know if he will ever be able to fly again. The doctors aren’t used to working on Angels. Angels have healers. But no one comes. 

“Cas. Tell me who to call.”

“There’s no one.”

“What about your family? Someone has to be able to help you man.”

“I have no idea where my parents are. I had a brother but he died. It was just the two of us. I’m alone, Dean. There is no one.”

“There’s me, Cas. There’s me.”

When he is released Cas comes home with Dean to his tiny loft apartment. There is only one bed and Cas gets it. Dean spends a week sleeping in a chair next to the bed because Cas has terrible dreams. He thrashes, yells, and cries in his sleep. Dean soothes him the best he can. Once he comes off the pain medication things get a lot better. Dean moves to the couch. Bobby gives both Dean and Cas work they can do from the apartment. Filing invoices, and stalking customers via phone for payment. Dean learns so much about Cas during the first few weeks after the accident. How he came from a wealthy family. He and his brother groomed for high society living. How his older brother rebelled sneaking off, skipping classes, ending in a noisy confrontation with his parents where his brother was thrown out and Cas was told to fall in line or get out with him. He says he never regrets leaving with Gabriel that night. Dean’s chest aches thinking of Sammy when Cas tells him about finding his brother dead in the street after being attacked by some stupid kid who thought that an angel must have some money on him and was angry when he found out Gabriel didn’t. 

Dean tells Cas about his parents dying and being bounced from foster home to foster home until he ended up at Bobby’s when he was fifteen. How Bobby kept him there even when his wife had died giving Dean the first safe permanent home he remembers in his life. He tells Cas in the dark one night, the words slipping out easier without the lights on, about how he finally found Sammy. How Sam was tall and strong and happy with his adopted family. How proud Dean is of him and how grateful he is to even have a tiny spot in his brother’s life. Even whispering to him about how his chest aches with the pain of not being there with his brother as they grew up. How lonely he sometimes feels. He doesn’t realize he is crying until he is pulled into a tight embrace and Cas uses his good wing to wrap around Dean and hold him close. 

Cas’s wing heals. There will always be a scar and the wing itself is very weak. They end up having to do a wing form of physical therapy which Cas despises. After several failed attempts at professional help Dean is taught how to help Cas move the wing joint and how to put pressure on the wing in order to add resistance to his movements helping to strengthen the muscles. Cas wouldn’t let the physical therapy people touch his wing stalking out and then refusing to go. He consents to allowing Dean after a full night of sitting up and thinking about it. When Dean asks what the big deal is. Cas responds “It’s intimate.” And Dean thinks that maybe that is what they are becoming. Intimate.   
Cas goes back to his place. Of course he does. He lives there. Dean wanders around his loft that first night. Lost and lonelier than he ever thinks he was before. He never minded being on his own before. But now there is this ache in his chest. He feels stupid. Crawls into his bed for the first time in six weeks and is certain there will be no sleep tonight. Flopping over onto his stomach he heaves a sigh of frustration and on the inhale catches Cas’s scent on the pillow, in the sheets. He pulls the pillow to his chest and drifts off to sleep. For about four hours. There is this obnoxious noise at 3:00 a.m. banging. Dean yanks the door to his apartment open so hard he almost knocks himself over. Cas walks in like he owns the place. 

“Dude?” Dean’s not getting his hopes up here but….

“Your bed is much more comfortable than mine.” And there is an angel in his bed before he can process what is happening. 

Dean moves to the couch too confused to be irritated at the change in sleeping arrangements.

“Aren’t you coming?” This almost whispered request coming from his friend. Dean slides into his bed next to Cas and is almost asleep when he feels the weight of a wing drape over his body. It is so warm and comfortable that Dean doesn’t even mind that he wakes up the next morning with a mouth full of feathers. 

By the third morning though he is getting pretty tired of it. 

“Cas, what is the deal with your wings?”

The lack of response should have been his first clue that this was going to be an awkward conversation. But then again, Dean always was pretty dense when it came to that sort of thing.

“Seriously man, are you molting or something?” 

Dean is aware the moment that joke falls flat on its face. His view of the TV is blocked by Cas’s abrupt insertion into his personal space blue eyes flashing wings shaking and turning over each other one tips out and knocks the lamp over with it thrashing and it take a moment to realize that Cas is speaking, quietly, intensely, to him.

“Do you think that’s funny? What do you know about my wings? You should show me some respect. I thought we are friends. Why are you mocking me? You have no idea what it’s like being alone. I hate these things. They are so hard to take care of. Impossible on my own. They itch and ache and never lay right. And now I have this one decrepit excuse for a wing that I can’t even fly. I wish they had cut the damn thing off.” 

“SHUT UP. Just shut up! Don’t you ever say that.” Dean’s up and shoving Cas back until he trips on the coffee table and lands on his ass on top of it with Dean leaning down into his face. 

“There is nothing wrong with your wings. So your right one is hurt, it’s getting better. I know and you know it too. It would be getting there faster if you would let me help you more but you won’t. I don’t understand what the big deal is. If you need help with your wings you could just ask me. I’m your friend. I would help you. That’s what friends do.”

There is this moment where Dean thinks this might be the end of the first really important relationship in his life. Cas’s eyes flash anger and fear at him, his wings sweep up in the air hovering like he wants to fly away. Then it’s over, the moment passes. His wings droop down to the floor and his shoulders sink. Cas lowers his eyes to the floor. If he weren’t gripping the coffee table so hard that the wood was creaking Dean would think   
he looked pretty calm. 

“Dean. I’m sorry. For an angel our wings are representations of our grace. Touching them at all, much less grooming them is something that is only done with family members. Mothers, fathers, siblings, husbands, wives. It’s private. I have tried to keep them groomed on my own but it’s complicated and while living with you I never had the time to try because there’s no space. I haven’t had anyone to help me groom my wings since Gabriel died. I didn’t mean to offend you.”

Dean drops back onto the couch. Leaning forward trying to get Cas to look him in the eye. When he finally does Dean sees pain and longing and he wants to reach out and hold his friend. 

“Cas, you are part of my family. You’re one of the people I am closest to in the world. If you want me to help you with your wings or you want me to leave so you can have some privacy all you have to do is ask.”

He doesn’t get an answer until much later that night. Halfway through Terminator II Cas whispers “please.” 

It turns out you need a lot of stuff to clean wings. They end up in the kitchen because there is no room in the bathroom. Dean has a walk in shower that could fit two. Cas has been squeezing himself in and out of it while he stays here but it won’t work for getting to the underside of his wings. So they cover the floor with towels and Cas leans against the counter while he shows Dean how to spread his feathers apart and clean them. Dean is struck by how complicated this is how much work this is going to be. Cas was right. This is something personal. Being allowed this close to his friend is a gift. Dean’s hands shake and his stomach is in knots. He is overwhelmed by how big this is and for a moment wants to run. He’s so afraid of fucking this up. 

There is silence and it takes Dean a minute to realize Cas has finally stopped talking. Maybe he’s nervous too because Cas is not much of a talker and he has been going on about feathers and different types of cleaners and there level of effectiveness for ten minutes. Which would have been very informative but all they have is dish soap but at least, Dean thinks, it might help get the grease stains out. 

“So, I guess we should start with the left one. My right wing is still more sensitive.” Cas stretches his wing out hesitantly. His eyes focused on the floor to the right of Dean’s feet. Dean feels like he is going to vomit for a second but when his hands touch Cas’s wing and he feels it tremble he immediately calms. Cas is nervous too and this is so much bigger for him. Dean gives his wing a gentle squeeze hoping to reassure him and then gets to work. 

It takes the good part of a half hour to clean the underside of Cas’s left wing. Dean spends several minutes trying to dig the grease stains out of his feathers. He’s horrified the first time one of the feathers comes out in his hand but Cas just gives this breathy gasp of a laugh “It’s normal. They haven’t been looked after properly for a while. Many of them may come out.” Dean has a pile of feathers on the ground beside him by the time he is halfway through the right wing. It is tough going on that side. Cas gasps and twitches while Dean works. Sometimes having to take deep breathes in and out through his nose while Dean tries to clean near where the break was. Dean starts humming mindlessly hoping to distract him. When they are finished Cas is leaning heavily on the counter, covered in a sheen of sweat. He looks shaky and pale. 

“Thank you, Dean.” His breath shudders out and Dean reaches out to grab his shoulder scared for a minute that he might just fall over. Cas leans forward into him. His head resting on Deans shoulder and takes a long deep breath. Dean wraps his arm around Cas and turns to nuzzle into his hair feeling whole and content. “So what now?” He says followed by an internal monologue of Don’t fuck this up. God please don’t let me fuck this up. 

“They need to dry and then I will need to oil them.” Cas pulls away from him slowly. Like he would rather stay than go. Dean is tempted to drag him back for another hug but then he has a thought. 

“Dude, I don’t think I have any oil. I don’t cook or anything.” Real smooth Jackass Because he thinks he may have just assumed Cas was into baking products. 

“I don’t need any, Dean. Don’t worry about it.” And that is a loaded response. Because Cas doesn’t have much stuff here. Just a couple of changes of clothes and a very small personal bag full of shower stuff. He must see Dean’s look because his face is turning three shades of pink and he tells the refrigerator with a calm authority. “I have oil glands at the base of each wing. I just need to spread it over the feathers.” There is a pause and an eye roll. Then “go ahead and say it.”

“So you’re self lubricating?” and Dean can’t help it. The laugh bubbles up out of him from out of nowhere and he is gasping and crying with the total weirdness of the situation. Cas pulls himself up to his full height and for the first time EVER he looks like a real angel. Aloof and removed down his nose at Dean. “Bitch.” He says then stalks out into the living area to flop on the couch. 

When Dean pulls himself together he follows him. “Jerk.” He says back and nudges Cas with his elbow when he gets no response he shoves hard. On the third try he shoves and brings his foot out to push Cas’s legs off the coffee table and the next thing he knows he is on the floor with and angel on his back tickling him for all he is worth. Dean totally does NOT scream like a girl. He does feel a small sense of victory after manages to at least turn over because Fuck Cas is heavy. But it feels so good to laugh. Cas flops on top of him boneless and warm. Who knew he was so ticklish. Dean reaches up runs his fingers through the feathers on both wings. He feels Cas tense for a moment then stretch his wings out to give Dean more access. 

“They feel dry to me. Do you want me to leave for a while? I could give you some privacy. Or, you know, if you needed me to, I could help.” 

“You wouldn’t mind?” Mind? Me mind touching you? Why the hell would I mind that!

“No. If you need my help. I’m fine with it.” Dean is trying to ignore the ache in his pants and hoping Cas gets up off of him before he shifts too far to the left and finds out how much Dean really doesn’t mind.

They move to the bed needing more space and the kitchen is a wreck. Cas sits with is back to Dean and stretches his left wing back as far as he can. “There is an oil gland at the base of my wing where the wing joint is. Put your hand on the top of the joint and slowly drag it about halfway down until you feel a lump about the size of a quarter.”   
Dean reaches out and runs his hand down the joint. Trying to be clinical but all he is focused on is the feel of where the feathers give way to warm soft skin and the way the muscles move and shift under Cas’s skin. He almost misses the gland and probably would have if Cas hadn’t gasped the second he touched it. “There. Right there.” And maybe he is imagining that Cas’s voice sounds strained. “You need to express the oil from the gland onto your fingers.” It sounds gross. Because anything you express from a human is just yuck. But Dean take a breath and circles the tiny lump once before slowly pressing in. Cas makes a choked humming noise and Dean feels warmth on his fingertips. He pulls back with a sheen of wetness on his fingers. “Now start at the base and work your way to the tips to coat the feathers.” It takes a few tries and some gentle breathy instruction from Cas but Dean gets the idea and after a few minutes can actually see the progress they are making. Cas’s feathers untwisting and flattening out. Falling into a natural pattern that dean didn’t even know was there. 

By the time he has finished one wing Cas is leaning over on his arms on the bed. He is moaning off and on quietly with his head bowed and eyes shut. “Dude. Are we having kinky angel sex and you just didn’t tell me?” 

“Yes Dean. We are having kinky angel sex and I didn’t tell you. If you are really good I’ll even sleep in the wet spot.” Cas snorts and Dean busts out laughing again. Reaching up halfway through a chuckle to wipe at an itch on his nose. He feels something damp on his face and realizes he forgot his hands were covered in oil. But there is no smell so he shrugs it off and keeps working. By the time he is finished Cas has melted into the bed. They paused at one point for him to lie down before he fell over. Dean can only see half of his face from this angle but he looks peaceful and relaxed. His wings look amazing. They are shiny and though there are many feathers still out of place they look much improved over when they started. 

“I guess this is more than just a one time deal, huh?” Dean is trying to sound casual. But the fact that he keeps petting and stroking the wings, the joints, and occasionally Cas’s back probably give away that he would be open for return visits. 

“It would require several sessions to completely correct the level of neglect, yes. But I don’t want to impose.” The words float up slurred from the pillow. 

“No problem, Cas. I don’t mind. Hey, move over. I am not doing all this work and then let you hog the bed.” Dean leans into Cas’s space wiping his hands on a towel by the bed when Cas jerks up. “What did you do to your face, Dean?” and Dean’s mind is blank until he remembers the oil on his nose. “It’s no big deal man I just had an itch. I’ll wipe it off. Lets go to bed. I’m tired.” 

“Dean, you have to go shower. Now. You can’t sleep like that. Go wash it off.” Cas sounds agitated and defensive and Dean is pissed he just spent all night helping the guy relax to get yelled at. “Cas, what’s your problem? I’m tired. If you don’t like it you go sleep on the couch.” Dean isn’t expecting the slow drag of a hand through his hair down to his neck or the possessive tug that Cas gives him to get him to turn his head and look. 

“Dean, you need to wash the oil off. I was joking before but to leave it on, to mark yourself with it, that is part of kinky angel sex. It means I have a claim on you. That you belong with me. If you were an angel there is a ceremony. But it’s close to marriage. This is a big deal. Not something you want. Not with me. Please, please go wash it off.”   
They stare at each other in the dim room and Cas slowly slides his hand from Dean’s neck dragging his fingers across Dean’s nose where the oil is gently before dropping onto the bed. And if that gesture wasn’t enough to clue Dean in that Cas really didn’t want him to wash it off the single tear sliding out of his eye, quickly blinked away, was. 

“Alright man, I’m going.” Dean stands in the bathroom for a long time with the shower running. Just looking at himself in the mirror. In the end he shuts off the water having never gotten in the shower, takes a deep breath, and head back out into the loft. Cas doesn’t comment on the fact that Dean is still covered in oil and Dean doesn’t comment on the fact that Cas’s face is still wet from the tears he must have shed while Dean was in the bathroom. They sleep. 

The next morning when he wakes up Dean is alone. He slams his way into the bathroom not able to look himself in the eye and by the time he slams himself back out again he skids to halt to find Cas fully dressed in a t-shirt and blue jeans sitting in the bed with a tray, two cups of coffee and a brown bag of something from the coffee shop down the street. “I wanted to make you breakfast to thank you for everything. But I don’t cook. So I cleaned up and went out to get stuff to bring you breakfast in bed. You were already up when I got back.” Cas looks nervous and glorious. His wings stretched out behind him in the morning sun. Dean is struck for the first time that his wings are reddish brown tapering down to gold near the tips. He’s breathless and frozen before Cas holds out his coffee to him and Dean limps to the bed settling down beside his friend to restart his day. 

“Why are you limping?” Dean blushes under the scrutiny. “I kicked something in the bathroom.” He doesn’t look up so he misses the small smile curving around Cas’s lips.   
Their days fall into a pattern. They go to work at the salvage yard and when they come home three nights a week Dean helps Cas through the physical therapy routine leaving them both aching and tired. On those nights he eases the last of the tension from Cas by grooming his wings. Easing out the tension collected there as he smoothes out the loose feathers. They never discuss the fact that Dean goes to sleep without showering. Instead waiting until in the morning but he doesn’t fail to notice that Cas is becoming more protective and possessive of him like there is a claim, a bond he can’t see. Other Angels, when he sees them take steps to give Dean a lot of space. Which is weird. He doesn’t care. Cas’s wing is getting stronger every week and Dean has fallen into a routine that offers security and contentment at every level of his life. He’s never been so happy. 

He has Sam research better products for the care and cleaning of angels. The dish soap has got to go. Sam bitches at first but he always did like a challenge and after Dean assures him that is not even remotely sexual (Because it isn’t, they haven’t even kissed.) then Sam is all aboard and it takes him less than a week to email Dean a list of possibles to try. Dean vetoes the first two on smell alone. Too fruity. The third and sixth ones Cas crosses off out of cost. They buy numbers four and five. After some experimentation they settle on five and Cas sends Sam a thank you email gaining himself a new email buddy. As if his life could get better Dean thinks. His brother and his angel like each other. 

Halfway through scrubbing grease off of the inside of Cas’s wing one night Dean slaps his hand into the water in the kitchen sink “Cas. We got to get a better apartment with a bigger bathroom. This is getting ridiculous. Can we get out of your lease and pool our money?” 

“My lease ended two months ago.” And isn’t that enlightening.

“Where is your stuff?”

“It was a furnished apartment. I don’t have much. What’s not here is being stored at Bobby’s.” 

Dean’s stunned. He looks at Cas and isn’t sure whether to shove him or laugh. And then

“I have my eye on this house down the road from the salvage yard. It has a garden tub and garage. I was thinking maybe you might want to go in with me. I’ve been saving my money. I should have enough for a down payment.” And that is how Dean Winchester ended up a home owner and the impala finally got the respect she deserved.

Things aren’t always great. Cas is moody, prone to periods of melancholy and Dean is an ass when he wants to be. They argue. Sometimes they don’t speak for a day. Dean or Cas will sometimes sleep in Sam’s room as they refer to the guest bedroom. As good as things are Dean feels this slow build of tension over the next month. He senses Cas shoving closer and then pulling away from him. The doctors finally clear Cas to try flying. Dean tries to be encouraging but it really only pisses Cas off until he slams down his soda one night and without another word takes off soaring. Dean is left standing in the dust of their backyard trying to reassure himself that Cas will come back. Of course he does. And hey, the angel can fly. 

It all boils over early one Sunday morning when Dean wakes up curled around Cas in his sleep. Nothing new to either of them. They frequently wake up and go to sleep piled on top of each other. Dean’s hard and realizes he’s been rubbing himself against Cas for God only know how long in his sleep. He is so grateful that Cas is still sleeping. Sliding out of bed to the bathroom. Dean slips into the shower and under the hot water he leans against the wall and strokes himself one hand rubbing over his dick, squeezing and teasing the head. His other hand rubbing his own nipples and around his chest as he tilts his head back whispering “Cas.” He is just getting into a good rhythm when the bathroom door bangs open and the shower curtain gets jerked back. Dean’s horrified and naked. Cas is angry his wings are thrashing and his eyes are intense. Cas just stands there for a minute and Dean steps farther back in the tub thinking crazily for a moment about the odds he could run past Cas and out the door. When Cas finally says “I just want to know one thing. Are you ever planning on kissing me?” At Dean’s less than coherent response of “Uhh.” 

“I am tired of waiting. What is it going to take with you? I move into your apartment, share your bed, consent to your offer of grooming, and buy a house with you. You touch me all the time, sleep curled around me, moan my name in your sleep and while you pleasure yourself. Not to mention that fact that by my culture you have anointed yourself as my mate. What am I doing wrong that keeps you from consummating our relationship?” 

“Cas, um, I don’t really think I can talk about this right now.” Naked here and the water is getting cold.

Cas growls this deep gravelly noise and leans into the tub until his hair gets wet. Then he leans away and yanks the shower curtain off the rod before stalking back out of the bathroom. Dean has never been so turned on in his life. 

Dean jumps out of the shower dries off and runs into the bedroom to throw on some pants. When he comes around the corner into the kitchen he finds Cas staring out the window into the yard. 

“I’ve never been so happy as I am with you. You’re the first best friend I have ever had. I don’t know when I started to want you to be more than that, but I do. I want you. I’m not sure why I haven’t kissed you. It’s like I already do everyday. I haven’t wanted to fuck this up, Cas. I haven’t wanted you to leave or feel like you had to give me something you didn’t want to give. I’m not anything special. Just a guy with a GED who works on cars. But I’m loyal and dedicated, and I love you. I love you. I just love you.” 

Cas turns to him and smiles this blinding smile that Dean has never seen on his face before. He catches Cas’s outstretched hand and allows himself to be pulled close inside Cas’s arms and surrounded by his wings. 

“Mine.” Cas whispers into Dean’s skin.

And maybe he kisses him then. But I couldn’t see. The wings were in the way.


	2. Chapter 2

Having a boyfriend with wings is an odd thing. Boyfriend? Lover? Significant other? Life partner? Mate? 

Oh man. We really got to work on what to call this relationship.

Dean Winchester is not an easy going guy. Sure he puts up a good front as being laid back and unconcerned with the world around him as a whole. But truth be told as far as intimacy goes, he is a basket case. This is why he is as shocked as anyone else that he is currently involved in as solid and dedicated a relationship as he has ever witnessed; with an angel. 

This is really part of the problem. See angels have wings. Things that have wings like to fly. Things that have wings and like to fly sometimes want their boyfriend/lover/significant other/life partner/mates to go flying with them. Which would be great but Dean Winchester is ape shit terrified of flying. He initially thought it involved aircraft but it turns out that it’s the though of being in the air in general that makes him want to scream and wet his pants (in a very manly way of course.) 

This then leads to the following issue. How do you tell your angel that you do NOT want to fly with them? So far Dean has tried a number of defenses:

“I think I feel sick.”

“ Maybe later.”

“I have too much work to do for Bobby.”

“Looks like rain. Probably not a good time.”

“You look tired, how about a backrub?”

“I have a headache.”

“I’m watching Dr. Sexy.”

“Look over there!” and then running away.

This doesn’t even begin to cover the times he has stalled out with blow jobs, hand jobs, and flat out sex. He is running out of options and Cas is either starting to catch on that something is up. Or he has always known this was an issue and he is just letting Dean work his way through it. Dean’s not sure which is scarier for him. Cas is a sneaky son of a bitch. 

Turns out he is a sneaky son of bitch with a plan. Dean knows he is being conned. Cas is way to quiet about their upcoming plans for the weekend. Dean agreed to a road trip with ease. He likes driving with the windows down, music up, and wind in his face. Cas likes to travel and see new places when they get the chance. So that’s their deal. Dean gets to drive and Cas plans the trip. 

“Where are we going?”

“Some place nice.” 

It’s that vague response that drives Dean crazy. But it is hard to get up the conviction to argue about it when Cas is digging his fingers into his back and working the tension out of Dean’s muscles. He makes a disgruntled murmur “mmmmhhhhhhhhhh…” which earns him a chuckle and quick smack on his ass. Dean jerks and gasps turning into a moan when Cas’s hand returns to the offended area stroking his palm firmly over the spot. 

“I thought you were tired” comes an amused voice from behind him. 

“I am. You should do all the work.” 

Dean smiles lazily when he gets the throaty laugh that Cas lets out so rarely. For all of his stoicism Cas is a tremendously focused and tender lover. Dean has never felt worshipped before this relationship but he is starting to understand what it means to be loved. Cas is driven to please Dean and is not satisfied until he is reduced to writhing mass of sensation every time they make love. Dean still blushes when he thinks about their first time after all that waiting and hesitation on his part. 

But that’s not the story we’re telling here. I may get back to that another time.

In any case Dean shouldn’t be surprised that he lost his train of thought about their weekend getaway. He’s only human.

Dean thinks maybe he trusts Cas too much. Because he doesn’t get really alarmed until they are halfway down the road to Cas only knows where. After several failed attempts to find out where they are going Cas finally settles the issue by bring up Dean’s current favorite subject. 

“Sam will be here in 3 weeks.” 

Sammy is going to be coming home for a month this summer. Dean laughed at the hesitant way he asked if it would be ok. Like there would ever not be room for him in Dean’s life. Cas is beaming at the idea and they have spent the last few weekends finishing up Sam’s room and making spaces for him in the rest of the house. Dean’s never seen his brother for more than a week here and there. So he’s looking forward to getting to spend some quality time with his little brother. He’s been worried about Cas and how he will feel seeing Dean’s brother when his brother is gone. 

“Dean” in that voice that says Dean is an idiot. “Sam’s my brother too, and my friend. I miss Gabriel, I always will, but I have a family. You’re my family. I’m not alone.”

Dean grips the steering wheel tighter. He totally does not want to just pull over and drag his angel into the back seat. Totally not. Really. 

“Besides, Sam and I have planned many interesting activities for his time with us. I’m looking forward to them.”

That’s what he gets for letting them become email BFF’s. Seriously between the emails and tweets Dean sometimes jokes Cas is only with him for his brother. He laughs at the blank stare of annoyance he gets from Cas and the bitch face he can HEAR Sam making over the phone. And if Cas holds him a little tighter those nights when he really is feeling a little insecure well then that is okay too. Dean loves them both so much. To be able to have them both in his life without conflict is a testament to not only Cas’s willingness to respect the importance of his brother but of how truly awesome Sam is. Because seriously, a suddenly appearing older brother who wasn’t raised with you, has no family, no education, and now is in a gay relationship with an angel is probably a hard sell to people. But Sam loves Dean. Dean knows that. Sammy is one of the most open and heartfelt people in the world and he has never blinked twice about Cas or anything as long as Dean is happy. 

“So how far now?”

“Another 46 miles and take exit 157.”

“Cas, are you ever going to tell me where we are going?”

“No, Dean.” 

“Dude. You drive me nuts sometimes. You know that, right?”

“The feeling is mutual.”

Turns out they are going nowhere. As in “the middle of…” there is a cabin and as Dean looks around that is just it. Nothing and no one else for miles. They drag their stuff into this tiny two room cabin. Dean keeps waiting for Cas to say something because this is a little rugged for them. If they wanted time alone in a little house they could have stayed at their little house. While dinner is cooking they step out on the porch and Dean has to admit it is a very nice view. 

He turns with his what the fuck look ready. Because seriously, Cas is weird as hell but this is weirder than most times. But before he can start talking Cas beats him to the punch. His voice rough and words stuttering. 

“I asked Bobby if we could come here. I wanted to get you away somewhere private. I love you. You have had such a profound impact on my life. My grace is bound to your soul so tightly that I don’t think I could ever free myself from you if I wanted to. And I don’t before you even start to ask. I brought you here to ask you again to fly with me. I know you don’t want to. I know you’re scared. But, Dean, I need this. I need you to trust me enough for this. It’s important to me. You helped to heal my wing; you help me care for them. I want to share this with you. I want to share all of me with you. Just come inside, eat dinner, and think about it. Please.”

The sun is setting. This long slow slide over the hill behind Cas. Dean sees him lit up in the glow of the fading light, his wings folded and gleaming. “Okay, Cas. Let’s eat.”

“Why is this so important to you?” 

Funny how it is so much easier to talk curled on top of Cas. There’s a fire going and those big beautiful wings spread out along the floor stretched out wide with Cas on his back. Dean leaning over his chest running his fingers through the soft down on the underside of the wings. Tracking over to press near the sensitive area where his wings join his back. Sweat still glistening on them from making love. Cas squirms and re settles Dean’s hands somewhere less sensitive. 

“When I’m flying it’s like everything in the world falls away from me. I’m above it, beyond it. I have this sense of joy that I’ve only ever felt with you. I want you to share that with me. I want to hold your body close to mine and soar.” 

Cas’s fingers tail slowly down the side of Dean’s face past his neck and down his side. Warm fingers rubbing slowly over the curve of his hip in a circular motion. He pauses and Dean knows there is more to it than what he is being told. That this is more personal than a free trip on the angel express. When Cas speaks again his voice is lower, deeper, almost a whisper. 

“Angels mate in flight. We bind ourselves to our lovers with our wings. Through grooming and anointing. A shared flight is part of that process. It’s a how we seal our bonds with our chosen partners. The longer we are together, the more I feel the need to fly with you. The urge gets stronger everyday. I know you are resistant to the idea of such a formal declaration. I was hoping out here in private you might reconsider and be willing to join with me.”

Interspecies dating should be a class taught somewhere. Dean is suddenly ashamed that he missed the importance of this. Thinking that Cas was taking his rejection of flying as a rejection of himself was so painful Dean felt tears prick on the corners of his eyes. Leaning forward so his head is resting under Cas’s chin with their chests pressed together Dean lets his thoughts stumble around in his head for a moment until he can sort at least the first part of this problem out. 

“Cas, I’m scared of flying. Not of flying with you, just FLYING in general. I don’t like having my feet off the ground. You’ve been asking me to do something that scares me to death.” There is a sharp intake of breath from Cas. Dean raised his head and sees those wild blue eyes looking at him in horror. He can’t help himself, he laughs and Cas laughs with him. When they finish they are shaking with mirth.

“Dude, they really do need a Dating for Humans and Angels 101 course that the local community college. This was just stupid.” 

“So not only are you not rejecting my bonding offer…..you had no idea I was making one in the first place. I’m a fool. It just never occurred to me that you wouldn’t know what I was asking you.”

“Seriously Cas, I’m more bonded to you than I have ever been to anyone. If I had any idea that you were asking me to, like, get married I would have totally had a conversation with you about the specifics at least.” And everything squeals to a stop in Dean’s head. Because suddenly his angel boyfriend/lover/significant other/life partner/mate wants to be his husband? 

“Dude are you asking me to marry you?”

“Yes.” Dean expects Cas to blush or look away but he has underestimated him once again and when he looks he finds Cas staring at him with his head tilted to the side face impassive and body relaxed. 

“How high up do we have to go?”

“However high you’re comfortable with. We can start small and ease into it if you want.”

“Are you sure that isn’t against the rules or something. If we only go a foot off the ground does that even count?”

“Dean. There is no rule book for this. I don’t know of any other human/angel bonding. I don’t have anyone to ask and I have never done this before either.”

“So what you are saying here is that you’re winging it?” A slow slide of a smile tracing his lips.

“You are insufferable and have a hideous sense of humor.” 

“Yeah, but you like it so much you’re gonna put a ring on it.”

Dean and Castiel Winchester got married on a Sunday in very intimate ceremony of the angelic kind. There were no witnesses for whom Dean was grateful as he started off his angel wedding clinging to his husband and squealing like a pig at take off. Once in the air though Dean started to understand what Cas meant about being above it all. There was a sense of freedom wrapped in his husband’s arms that he hadn’t really felt outside of driving fast on an empty highway. 

Of course cultural differences still abound as Dean thought Cas meant mating as in the literal sense and almost caused a crash landing trying to worm his hand into Cas’s pants. Turns out his angel forgets to flap when you suck on the side of his neck. Once Cas assured him that it was a symbolic flight not an air orgy they decided to move the festivities lower to ground level and consummated their relationship status change in a clearing near the cabin. 

When they tell the story they leave out the months of miscommunications, Dean squealing like a pig, and the in-flight molestation. They also don’t talk about their incredibly passionate and romantic joining in the clearing that was covered with poison oak. Turns out even angels are allergic and they got it everywhere. 

Let’s just say it was a hell of a honeymoon.


	3. Chapter 3

“If you move that one more time I will throw it out the window.”  
The TV remote makes a little screeching sound as Dean puts it back where it was the last time he repositioned it.   
“Dude, I can’t help it. I just want it to look nice for when Sammy gets here.”  
“Dean, Sam is not going to care where the TV remote sits. Besides it’s true place of residence is in your hand not on the table anyway.”  
Dean bristles. He knows Cas is teasing him. It’s not a new thing, just something that Dean has started to notice more over time. He used to think his husband didn’t understand the references Dean made during their talks early on. Back when they were just friends with an endless untold life full of possibility stretching in front of them. Turns out that Cas makes and effort to show a sense of humor after he’s comfortable around you. Angels lead very long lives and for Cas to get comfortable can take a while.   
Dean tries not to think about that particular difference. Cas will live long past when he does, even if he is lucky enough to have very long life. Dean’s still not come to terms with that part of loving someone and being loved. That sometimes you have to leave them, even if you don’t want to. The thought does little to lift Dean’s mood. He’s just plain bitchy when he is nervous. He turns his head to bark something rude at Cas when the tip of one of Cas’s wings slides into his ear dripping wet. And holy God that is so gross.   
“Damn it Cas! You know I hate that!”   
The water glass he had on the coffee table goes flying off in the tussle that follows. You would think he would learn. Cas is always using those wings for things that annoy the hell out of Dean. In the ensuing running to get paper towels and glaring at his husband who will not stop laughing even though he is helping to clean up, Dean almost misses the doorbell.   
“Oh SHIT! Of course he gets here now.”   
“Take a deep breath. It’s just your brother.”  
But Dean knows Sammy is not just anything. Sammy is the whole of Dean’s family. The last link to a different life. He’s important. And Dean needs this month of him being here to work because he needs to believe that he can blend Sam and Cas together and get one family unit. If he can’t…well that just can’t happen.  
“OPEN THE DOOR YOU JERK.”  
Cas sighs as Dean jerks out of his thoughts. Realizing that he must have just stopped moving when he heard the doorbell. Cas brushes past him toward the banging door rubbing his back with first his hand and then a wing on the way by. He opens the door and looks out and then up at Dean’s little brother.   
“You are gigantic.”   
Totally deadpan, as though this is something that Sam should know but might be unaware of. And cue the patented tilt of the head as though Cas is struggling to understand why Sam is so much taller than he obviously thought he should be.   
“Yeah, um, well your wings are huge.”  
“Yes they are.”   
This is going horribly. Cas won’t even let Sam in the house. Dean’s anxiety crests and jumps up to intervene, rushing toward the door, when he hears the snickering.   
“You sons of bitches planned this didn’t you?” And he would be mad but the sight of his brother hugging his husband hello and giving him a big slap on the back is worth more than gold to Dean right now so he lets it go.   
“Dean, man, Cas and I have been talking to each other for over a year. Are you seriously that worried we won’t get along?”  
Ok. So Sam has a point. Cas and Sam’s epic story of asexual, platonic, love for one another has played out in voicemails, emails, tweets, and the occasional actually letter when Sam is really really bored in class. But they have never occupied the same space. The last time Dean went to see Sam; Cas had to cover for him at the salvage yard. Bobby had been sorry about it but business is business.   
Plus it had given Dean a whole three days to try to choke out to his brother in person that he was kind of, sort of, totally in love with his best friend. Oh yeah and just in case Sam hadn’t noticed, his best friend has a penis. And don’t forget the wings. The whole conversation was made that much more awkward when Sam stopped laughing long enough to ask Dean “So how is it? Being with an angel?” and Dean had to admit that he didn’t know because he is totally not telling Sam about the one night Anna stand. (He wants his brother to think he has some class.) And he and Cas hadn’t moved past kissing and heavy petting to the main event yet.   
That didn’t happen until he got home. Three days away from Dean had given Cas a lot of time to think and plan. He had walked right into an ambush and, well, this story isn’t about that. Seriously guys, Sam is right there.   
“Where do I drop my stuff? Just point me to a corner or something. I don’t need much space.”  
Sam starts to chuckle almost immediately because it turns out that Dean and Cas now have the head tilt of death down to a science. Maybe people are right. The longer you are with someone the more of their habits you pick up.  
“Sam, don’t be ridiculous. You have your own room.”   
It only takes about an hour for Sam to settle in. He unpacks and dinner time finds him draped over the couch arms and legs dangling everywhere discussing with Cas liberal verses conservative policies on Angel species profiling; which only makes Dean happy as hell that he has no plans to move to Arizona any time in his life span.   
A week goes by and Sam has read every book in the house worth reading, cleaned anything that wasn’t nailed down, and toured all the interesting (and not so interesting) tourist destination in a 50 mile radius. He is twitchy and grouchy. The bitch face almost permanent on his face and his weekly phone call home to his parents doesn’t make it any better. Dean hears a couple of words involving something about him coming home to them. But the explosion from Sam of “You leave Cas out of this. That is none of your business.” Is what really makes him curious about what his brother has been hiding.   
They don’t talk about it. When Cas comes home the next day he drops keys to the office into Sam’s lap and says “Bobby wants you there at 7 sharp to open the office. We have an early pick up. Don’t leave Chuck and Becky alone in the copier room.”   
Sam holds up the keys and beams. Cas goes to work the next day with wings so straight, perfect, and gleaming that you would swear they were new if you missed the scar on the inside of his right one. Dean’s hands ache for two days from all the work it took to get them there. But getting his brother a job was enough incentive for Dean to put in the extra effort. Seriously his husband is awesome.   
Two weeks in and Cas and Sam are finishing up some yard work when Dean gets home. Coming over to kiss him, Cas suddenly stops and when Dean looks he sees Sam’s hand on Cas’s right wing. He’s digging some leaves out of Cas’s feathers and trying to smooth them back into some semblance of order.   
Cas has this look on his face that Dean can’t understand and then it softens into a small tight grin and his shoulders drop. He accepts Sam’s grooming without comment and Dean’s chest tightens with something so strange and ugly that he turns to go back into the house.   
“I’ll start dinner.”   
Cas doesn’t bring it up and over the next few days there is more contact between Sam and Cas than before. Sam will shove Cas teasingly and Cas will flick water at him with his wings and bop him on the head when Sam isn’t looking. Dean will find Sam poking and prodding at Cas’s wings at random times. Dean comes home twice that week to find them on the couch together Cas sitting up on the end with Sam’s legs stretched out and his feet slung across Cas’s lap. He doesn’t understand it and it’s driving him crazy.   
By the start of week three when Cas slides into bed with Dean at night Dean rolls as far over to the other side of the bed as he can. Staring at the wall like it holds the answers to his problems. He knows it’s stupid but he can’t help the creeping feeling of jealously that spreads up from his gut. It just serves to make him more upset that he is petty enough to be upset when them getting along is what he really wanted. But Dean feels left out. Like there is this whole subtext that he is missing between his brother and husband. Something he should understand but doesn’t. And truth be told Dean has never been good with change.   
He doesn’t hear the footsteps while he is under the truck at the salvage yard the next day. So he really can’t blame Sam that he bashes his head on the undercarriage when Sam grabs his leg and yanks him out from under the truck as hard as he can.   
“You are one dumb fuck. You know that Dean?”  
Dean has never seen Sammy mad. Not at him. So the full weight of a very angry brother pins Dean to the ground more than anything else.   
“What the hell is wrong with you? Are you going to screw up the best thing in your life because you are dumb enough to think your brother has the hots for your husband? Seriously dude?”  
Oh, Dean wasn’t sure Sam had noticed the attitude. Or another, more frightening thought crosses his mind. Sam and Cas may have been talking. Dean doesn’t refuse sex nor the chance to groom his husband. He had backed out of both this week. Cas had to be concerned.   
“I do not think you have the hots for Cas.”  
“Then what is your problem? You barely speak to me and you are shoving Cas away so hard it’s like you want him to leave or something.”  
There is a huge tug of guilt.   
“You keep touching him. I don’t like it.”  
“So what? you’re an asshole to both of us because you don’t share well? Dean, you are such a jerk.”  
And Dean is left in the dust on his back with his brother stalking off. He looks down at his chest and sees the book Sam slammed down on it before he turned to go. Angel Familial Structure and Hierarchy. Dean sighs. He never did like research.   
He’s even more embarrassed when he finds out that not only is there really a class about human and angel relationships or something like that in school; but that Sam has an A in it.   
He gets to chapter three by dinner Bonding and Grooming. And okay, Dean really is an ass. He can deal with it. It’s not like it’s a surprise or anything.   
Grooming plays an important role in defining relationship roles for Angels in family structure. While defining family hierarchy the process of grooming and the acceptance of said action help to bond family units. When relationships are familial yet not intimate (in the case of brother’s perhaps) grooming is exchanged. Indicating that these two members are on equal ground in the relationship. This is surface touching only. More intimate grooming and cleaning is reserved for mates and within the parent child relationship.   
What the book doesn’t go into is what you do in response if the person grooming you doesn’t have wings. Dean is guessing that Cas improvised with the almost cuddling. So basically Dean is an ass and his brother and husband have spent this visit happily reinforcing to each other their equal level of importance in Dean’s life.   
Everyone is happily secure and comfortable with their new family dynamic except Dean; who was too stupid to realize what was going on.   
He goes to Sam first because he’s chicken and Sam is easier to deal with than Cas.  
“Jerk.”  
“Bitch.”  
“Keep the book. You are obviously going to need it.”  
He rolls back out of Sam’s room grinning like an idiot. He keeps the book too because a little light reading never hurt anyone.   
He finds Cas in their bedroom. Sitting on the side of the bed trying to restructure some of his neglected feathers. They only missed a couple of grooming opportunities but something about Cas’s feathers invite chaos. He looks frustrated and terribly sad. Dean is not surprised when Cas jumps when he slides down onto the bed behind him and slides his fingers around the base of his wings. Dean rubs his fingers up and down along the wing joints scratching at the glands near the base. Cas whimpers dropping his hands to the edge of the bed, gripping the quilt there in both hands.   
When his touch isn’t rejected Dean leans his head down to press kisses up Cas’s spine, between his wings. He kisses up the side of Cas’s neck and stops to inhale his husbands scent.   
“I’m sorry, Cas. I didn’t understand what was going on with Sam and I acted like a dumb ass. I didn’t understand why he was touching you and I guess I just don’t know how to share.”   
There is a chuckle from Cas who leans his head up and stares at the ceiling. “You want Sam and me to like one another. But not like each other too much. I don’t think I will ever understand you. It’s all so complicated. How do you define your boundaries and form bonds with each other if you never touch?”  
“We touch, Cas. We just don’t have these.” And Dean drags his hands up the sides of Cas’s wings ruffling some of his feathers the wrong way, making Cas twitch and moan.  
“I forget sometimes that we are so different. I reach out with my wings expecting yours to be there. Sometimes in my mind I can see what you would look like with them. In my dreams sometimes I know what it is like to touch them. It would be so much easier if you and I were the same.”   
There is a chill down Dean’s spine. A feeling of rejection that Dean has felt before but never with Cas. He drops his hands and closes his eyes against the threat of tears. When it comes to matters of the heart Dean has always been the one to cut ties first. Better to be the one doing the hurting than have to show someone else how much he can be hurt. He tries to find the energy to be angry, to lash out, to joke it off. But it’s just not there. He can’t bring himself to go there tonight.   
“I’m sorry if I’m not enough for you.” And he is. So sorry that being with him is denying Cas something that he seems to so fundamentally need. He goes to slide off the bed. Thinking that he should go, leave, sleep on the couch, something. He doesn’t expect Cas’s hand on his arm or the strength behind the shove that knocks him flat on his back on the bed. Cas holds him in place with ease. He’s way stronger than Dean but that has never been a concern. Cas wouldn’t hurt him.   
“Mine.” And it occurs to Dean that maybe he’s not such a good judge of what Cas fundamentally needs. Because Cas doesn’t look like he is letting Dean go any time soon.   
“You are ignorant, obnoxious, irritating, and half the time I have no idea what is going on with you. But you are my MATE. I didn’t choose you lightly or without considering the consequences of binding myself to a human soul. Our relationship is complicated but well worth it. I am fulfilled and loved in a way I never understood before you. So if you think that I am just going to let you act like you aren’t everything to me then you need to check yourself.”  
Dean feels the ache in his chest that has been building for the last two weeks ease. There’s no look of regret in his husbands eyes, nothing in his gaze that makes Dean feel like he wants him to be anything but what he already is. Dean relaxes, and just maybe, being good enough is something you just have to decide you are for yourself sometimes. After all, no one else in his life but him seems to think he isn’t worth it.   
“You mean, before I wreck myself?”  
If he rolled his eyes any harder Dean is pretty sure Cas’s left one would fall right out of his head and roll away under the bed. It’s the last thought he has before his mouth is otherwise occupied and Cas has yanked his shirt up and is trying to pull his pants off one handed. When Cas squirms down his body to slide Dean’s dick into his mouth Dean lets out a moan that he knows is too loud right before he hears the banging on the wall.  
“DUDE. I already went blind walking in on you two in the kitchen. I do NOT want to be deaf too. STOP IT!”  
Samuel Cock Block Winchester. That should be his name. Dean is sure of it.   
In the middle of week four Dean starts trying to get Sam to plan his next trip back to visit, or for he and Cas to come to see him. He is not comfortable with the lack of response from his brother. Sam is being a little vague. Well ok. A lot vague and Dean is worried that maybe he and Sammy aren’t as okay as he though they were. When he hears Sam slam the phone down for the third time on his parents Dean decides enough is enough.  
“Sam, what is up with your mom and dad?”  
Sam lets out this long sigh and his shoulders slump.   
“Mom and dad are good people. They love me and they were so happy when you found me. They really wanted me to have contact with my birth family.”  
“But?”  
Sam huffs out this breath like he is disgusted to even have to bring this up “But, they aren’t so sold on Cas.”  
“Oh, so their not homophobes, they are just speciesists?”  
“Dean, first of all, I don’t think that is a real word. Secondly, their both.”  
“Oh.”  
“Yeah.”  
“So what now?” Because Dean is grateful for his space in Sam’s life. But to ask his brother to go against the people who raised him, loved him, took care of him. That is something Dean is not willing to risk. He loves Sam too much.   
“So their mad. I hope they get over it. I’m pretty sure they will, eventually. I’ll keep trying. Until then I’m going back to school a month from now. Bobby says he will hold my job until Christmas for me to come back on the holiday. Cas says I can stay here.”   
“Oh. Sounds good. Umm, What?”  
Sam smiles this huge grin that Dean can’t help but smile back at. “Yeah, I’m moving in. That was what they were just so upset about. I told them I wasn’t come home because I was already home here, with you and Cas.”   
“Cas already knows all of this doesn’t he?”  
“Yeah. We worked it out last week when you were being a jackass.”  
Dean walks back into the house with a smile on his face.   
He is still smiling the next morning when Cas wakes up with his wings covered in glitter and Sam has his hand glued to the side of his face.   
Seriously, there’s only but so much bonding a guy can take.


	4. Chapter 4

Sam’s text book has seen better days. The binding is frayed off and the pages are warped. It looks like someone used it to mop up spilled coffee. It’s irritating, really, because he knows he told Dean he could hold on to it, but hell, that thing is a mess. 

Sam picks it up off the table by the corner because God only knows what is going to fall out of it. Upon closer examination he starts thinking maybe Dean isn’t to blame for the condition of his book. Yeah, Sam’s pretty sure he needs to revise his assumptions of damage to include Cas as well. Half the pages of the book are covered in tiny red writing and red lines through whole paragraphs. He skims some of it and realizes that his brother-in-law must have been making some corrections, which makes sense. 

Who better to correct a book about angels and their culture than an angel himself? 

Though from the looks of it the researcher must have just made up half of the stuff. Sam sighs; he is going to have re-read this book now. The professor at college who uses it for class is going to be pissed. 

The funny thing is that the whole last chapter of the book is missing. It’s been ripped out, all of the pages removed. Sam skims his fingers down the index in the front for the listing of what that chapter was about and it’s totally blacked out. Oh boy, looks like Sam needs to pick up an extra shift or two at the salvage yard. He remembers this chapter. It was about the bond formed between Angels and their mates with their grace.

“Good morning”

The gravel deep voice behind him should be startling but Sam figured he was close by. 

“Cas, when are you going to tell him?”

“Tell him what?”

“Don’t be Dean with me. I know what you’re doing. He is going to want to know what happened to the last chapter of this book. Dean is going to be pissed when he finds out you removed it. Just give it back, man. He has to find out some time.”

“No, he doesn’t.” There is a finality there that is laughable. Sam knows Dean. If he wants to find something out there is nothing that is going to stop him. Dean plays dumb so that he can fly under the radar. But he’s not stupid or uneducated. 

“Dude, seriously, was the chapter totally wrong or something? Is that why you tore it out?”

“No.” There is a flicker of irritation over Cas’s face. “It was the only part of the book that was totally right.” 

“So you bound your grace to my brother’s soul and it is permanent. I know Dean has commitment problems but Cas, he adores you. Just go ahead and tell him he is stuck with you for life and get on with it. He’ll probably be happy. You know he has all those issues with abandonment.” 

“That’s not what I’m concerned about. Dean is going to react badly when he realizes how permanent this is. Sam, the bond is irrefutable. I will live out my life at Dean’s side. When his time here is over, mine will be too.”

It’s like the air vacuums out of the room in that moment. Angels live a really long time. Sam hasn’t asked but he is pretty certain that Cas is already older than he and Dean put together and still considered young by his culture. Dean’s 32. He’s not middle aged or anything but still.

“You die when he dies? Is that what you’re telling me.”

There is a smile playing at the edge of Cas’s mouth. Sam is shocked by it. He’s having a conversation in a kitchen on a Tuesday about his brother and husband going out in a blaze of glory together. This is unreal, Sam is FREAKED, and Cas is SMILING. 

“Dude you look happy about it!”

“Why wouldn’t I be? There would be no further reason for me to exist in this realm when he is gone. I belong with him, where he goes I follow. Imagine how it might be for me Sam. To be certain that I will never have to be without him even for a minute. It doesn’t frighten me. Angels don’t view death like humans do. It gives me comfort to know we will be together.”

Ok. Yeah, he can sort of wrap his head around that a little bit. 

“That is NOT going to comfort Dean.” 

“No it’s not; which why we aren’t going to tell him.”

Oh shit. 

There is hilarity to living with his brother and watching his oddly adorable relationship with Cas play out. When Sam gave Dean the book he really just wanted to rub it in Dean’s face that he was being insensitive. Sam never expected that Dean would read past chapter three. It’s actually fun for the first ten chapters or so. Dean reads them, he has questions, and it sparks debates over dinner with the three of them about cultural differences and species mingling. Sam’s thrilled by it, he loves philosophical discussions. 

Then Dean gets to Chapter 13. Courting in Angel Hierarchy. It’s all down hill from there. Sam sits in the living room with his IPOD on max volume trying to drown out the noise coming out of his brother’s mouth when he realizes that by Angel standards Cas is way too good for him. So good in fact that Dean would not have even been allowed to court Cas in the first place. Assuming that a human would even have been allowed to attempt that anyway. 

Cas doesn’t help this little freak out along by listening intently to Deans concerns and then bursting into laughter right in his face. When Dean storms out, his jaw clenched, and hands shaking, Sam looks for Cas who has collapsed onto the floor with tears rolling down his face from mirth. 

Why did I want to live here?

They get over it. Hell, they always do. Sam’s not sure if Dean can feel the tug on his soul toward Castiel’s grace, at least not consciously. But his behavior speaks to a need to be near his husband and to make things right when there is conflict. So here Dean is different than any other relationship in his life except for with Sam. He will apologize, and if required grovel, in order for he and Cas to be on even ground. 

Dean starts acting nuts around Chapter 14. The Process of Courting. He starts standing way out of Cas’s personal space bubble and not making direct eye contact. He tries not to touch him too much. Their speech is very formal. All of this being the exact opposite of what they usually do. Sometimes Sam thinks they are literally joined at the hip. 

Then the strange rocks and baubles start showing up all around the house. Cas inspects them with an air of innocence about him. No one says anything. Because what do you say? Sam has tried to mentally sound out this conversation with Dean in his head. All of the options end up with Dean putting hair remover in his shampoo. He’s just not willing to go through that again, thank you.

It’s when they get home from work one night and see Dean in the back yard practicing some really horrible dance, that Sam pins Cas down in the hallway and demands answers. 

“What the hell is going on with you two?”

“Dean regrets that he did not follow the customs of my culture during our courtship. He asked permission to court me again formally to make up for it. I told him repeatedly that this was not necessary but he insisted.”

“So that is what all this weird shit is about? He is trying to date you?” 

“Formally, yes.”

Sam knows he has to ask. It’s too good to let go.

“What’s the deal with the dancing?”

Cas sighs. Sam can see redness in his cheeks. He fascinated by it because he has never seen Cas blush.

“Dean and I are having difficulty with a particular part of the courtship.”

“The flight of intent?” Sam has read about this part. The formal moment when the angel being courted has to respond publicly to the pursuer. If accepted then they share a flight together, sort of like an aerial dance. It sounds nuts but in class they had a video of it and it’s actually very romantic and beautiful to watch. But then both the people on that video had wings and Dean does not. 

He looks like he is stumbling around the backyard drunk. 

“I will try to stop him again, Sam. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

“Oh, no. I don’t want you to stop him.”

“You don’t?”

“No way man. This is too good. Just tell me where to set up the camera.”

Sam is suddenly totally certain of what his thesis is going to be about. 

My life ROCKS!

If there was any dancing Sam missed it. Damn Cas and his protective streak. That would have ended the prank war for all time and Sam would have come out the winner. Things settle back to normal and they fade into a period of companionship for two weeks. Then it all comes unhinged. 

Sam walks into the house and finds Dean with a brand spanking new copy of the book in his hands. He takes one look at Sam and with absolute authority says 

“Go to your room.” 

It never even occurs to Sam to argue or to do something else like leave. He expects yelling. It never comes. Sam only catches bits of the conversation that follows.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Please don’t be mad.”

“What else are you hiding?”

“So sorry. Please just don’t…”

There is murmuring, they sound closer together, and Sam lets out the breath he has been holding. 

“Can you feel me? Can I feel you?”

And Sam wants to know the answer to those questions. The nature of the bond and the intimacy between his brother and his husband drives Sam nuts. He wants to be able to understand what it is like to feel linked to someone so completely. Part of it is Sam’s nature. Another part is a need to be accepted, to be precious enough to someone else to never be given away. 

Dean opens the door to his room and Sam jerks back trying to act like he wasn’t just pressed up against it. His brother’s eyes are red and puffy but Dean smiles at Sam. 

“Dinner’s in 20 minutes. Get your shit out of the living room.” 

Well, he’s not going to get any answers from Dean. 

Sam’s just going to have to ask Cas later. He will ply him with chocolate and Cas will spill his guts. It’s a ritual they have. 

Sam loads his stuff back into the car for his trip back to school. He’ll go to his parent’s house for Thanksgiving assuming they are speaking then. But will be back home here at Dean’s for the holiday break. Cas and Dean have plans to come up in October. Their weekly phone call is scheduled and he’s looking forward to challenging his professors on their ideas about species intermingling and cultural complications. 

“Did you get everything?” 

“Dude if you ask me that one more time.”

“Call me when you get there. Let me know you’re safe.”

“Ok MOM.”

“Bitch.”

“Jerk.”

There is hugging and Sam feels relieved that he is not leaving Dean on his own this time when he leaves. Cas lifts Sam up off the ground when it’s his turn. Laughing as Sam squeals and tries to twist out of his grasp. In retaliation Sam grabs both Cas’s wings and yanks on them hard. It has no effect but Cas does put him down. Before he lets him go he whispers in Sam’s ear.

“Call him or he will worry.” 

As he is driving off Sam looks into the review mirror to see Cas wrap his arms and wings around Dean dragging him in for a hug. Dean ducks his head pressing it into Cas’s throat. He sees Dean smile and return the hug. Sam smiles to himself leaning over to turn up the radio. 

He can hear Cas laughing in the background ten minutes later when Dean calls his cell. Turns out that water up over the door trick worked and with Cas’s help at making sure Dean went in the house first he got the whole bucket right on the head. 

He wonders what the response will be when Cas realizes that there is pink hair dye in his wing cleaner.


	5. Chapter 5

You would think anyone who ends up with an angel working at a salvage yard would have fascinating story to go along with it. But really, the truth of the matter is that on a Monday morning, while working in his office, Bobby Singer hired an angel as an auto mechanic because the guy had answered the ad he left in the paper.  
Bobby was hoping for a mechanic/office manager because he really had to fire Becky. She and Chuck were a mess waiting to happen and he did not want that break up on company time. Sadly though, for Bobby, Castiel’s people skills could be summed up in one brief exchange.  
“How are your people skills? I’m looking for someone to work the front desk part time.”  
“People are…….fine.”  
And so Castiel shows up for work the next day with no aspirations of office managering.  
Come to think of it he hadn’t had any aspirations for anything out the job but a paycheck. He hadn’t known then that Dean Winchester took every other Monday off.   
The only thing Bobby had asked, in his deceptively gruff tone, was   
“I don’t need to worry about anyone showing up here looking for you do I?”   
It was an understandable question from Castiel’s perspective. Angels are not auto mechanics at salvage yards. It was also laughable.   
“No. No one is ever going to come looking for me.”   
Castiel had felt Dean coming before he had been assigned to show him around. Something bright and sharp about his being radiating from across the yard. When Castiel did look he was surprised by the fluctuations in Dean Winchester’s soul.   
All humans have an aura that Angels can see. There is a tremendous misconception that angels can read minds. It’s totally false but, they do little to correct this error. Gabriel used to purposefully stare at people just for the fun of it. Making them uncomfortable until they would sweat, twitch, and flee. They never had any idea what they were really thinking but it gave them both a laugh. Castiel misses his brother, so badly.  
Dean’s soul is sharp and clear, intense. Castiel is drawn towards it immediately. There is power in this human and drive. Shadows pass through and around Dean’s spirit as Dean comes toward him. Castiel has no idea why, but there is something painful inside this man. His grace stretches out toward Dean during their first exchange and Castiel is pleased by Dean’s response.   
Though the initial encounter is somewhat uncomfortable by the end of the day Castiel is reassured that there is potential for him and Dean to work well together. Dean’s soul accepts the gentle press of Castiel’s grace and settles to something that resembles peace. Even though he knows well that humans have no conscious knowledge of this interaction; it makes Castiel smile to himself, on the way back to his tiny apartment, to think that he may have found a friend.   
He was temped to watch Dean squirm even further at lunch the next week when he struggled to ask for Castiel’s phone number. It was, he supposes, cute. He gives in quickly, as doing so offers an opportunity to spend more time with this fascinating man. They work well together. Bobby has entrusted Dean and Castiel with a number of interesting job tasks this week. By far the most intriguing being a repo job in the middle of the night involving a very expensive car, a very naked woman, and very stupid man with a knife. Angels are strong and Dean is a fast talker who can rig a car to a tow truck quicker than Castiel thought was humanly possible.   
When they get back to the yard Bobby is waiting, in his baseball hat and bathrobe, so are the police. After all the paperwork is filled out and the reports filed all Bobby says is “Next time leave less marks on the guy. Idjits.”   
Dean then informs Castiel loudly that “It’s pancake time.” 

“Please Dean. Please. It hurts. It HURTS.”

Castiel thinks of truck axels with mix of distain and gratitude for the rest of his life. He’s never felt pain like that in his existence. He has lived 66 years by the human calendar and is still considered a youth in his culture. But had it not been for that accident he may never have gotten close enough to Dean to be sure that Dean was his mate.   
Cas, When did he start to think of himself by that name? remembers little of the first few days after the accident. The pain from his wing is excruciating. The medication does little but dull his senses. It’s understandable, the doctors had never treated an angel before. There was no way of knowing what the drugs would do to him. Cas wakes up intermittently in Dean’s bed, his grace coiled tightly around himself. He has horrible nightmares about his brother and then about Dean, about being alone and crippled for the rest of his life.   
There are moments when he thinks it might have been preferable to have bled out under that axel than to suffer like this. But Dean’s scent on his sheets and the hesitant, careful way his soul stretches toward Cas’s grace bring him through.   
By the time the pain begins to fade, Cas is very well aware that he is in trouble. His grace carries a constant stamp of Dean’s expressive soul on it. His focus narrowed to just his friend and no one else. Cas has never experienced imprinting before. He never thought he would.   
Imprinting, he was always told, was the first step in the mating process, after formal courting, assuming the suitor was accepted. Then the angels would retreat to themselves until their grace’s had fully accepted one another. This imprinting assured that both partners were equally committed to the rest of the bonding process. This is important, because in angel culture there is no such thing as divorce. Once you’re bonded, that’s it forever. Can you imagine living out the rest of your days soul bound to your ex?   
Let’s all take a moment to contemplate that and shudder.   
3,   
2,   
1   
We all done? Good, moving on.  
Oh Father, what have I done?   
There is no way that Cas is going to let any strange human touch his wings. The physical therapy is painful and humiliating. He flat out refuses to go back. That would have been the end of the discussion too, if it weren’t for the incessant pull on his grace by Dean’s worried soul. That and the puppy dog eyes. Damn the puppy dog eyes.   
He can’t refuse Dean’s offer to help. Cas wants to be well again. He wants to fly. It’s awkward. He can feel Dean’s fear and attraction filtering through. But it hurts so damn bad that Cas barely has time to contemplate the possibilities of that before he regrets ever agreeing to this.   
He gets better. He goes back to his apartment. He can’t just live with Dean for the rest of his life. They have no formal agreement. Cas is certain Dean has no idea that his best friend has imprinted on him for potential mating. He has no claim on Dean. But so help him he wants one. Cas lasts half a night in his apartment before the draw to be close to Dean becomes uncomfortable. He misses his friend and the loneliness he has felt since he lost Gabriel seems so much more encompassing now that he has spent so much time with another soul. He’s grateful that Dean lets him in without too many questions. How do you tell someone that you want to be near them without sounding like some horrible brat pack movie they showed in the 1980’s?   
When Dean joins him in the bed it’s all Cas can do to not molest him right then. But humans have such weird customs and ideas about romance. Cas doesn’t understand any of it. He thinks he should follow Dean’s lead. He can feel Dean’s interest, his attraction. Certainly Dean will create a path for Cas to follow, give him some clues on romancing his potential mate. It takes Cas until they buy a house together to figure out that Dean is CLUELESS about this. In fact, if it hadn’t been for Sam flat out telling him that Cas had to make the first move or he was going to spend the rest of his life sexually frustrated he still would be wondering why Dean wasn’t kissing him.   
Cas is endlessly grateful for Sam. Intelligent, caring, creative, compassionate, sometimes cock blocking, Sam. Bless him. 

“Seriously man, are you molting or something?”  

There is no way I am having this discussion. But he is. Cas feels a wave of self disgust role over him. His wings have never been what angels would consider to be attractive. They’re a shade too big, they never stay in place, and no amount of grooming has ever helped the feathers to align correctly. Cas is aware of his short comings in this area. But the strained way he now has to hold his right wing and the ugly gash running down the center of the inside of it only serve to highlight what would have already been considered ugly. What was once unattractive is now hideous.   
He’s ashamed even as he is yelling. Dean’s soul responds to his harsh words by balling up closer to his center and turning a sickening shade of yellowish green. It only lasts for a moment before it slams back out against Cas’s grace buffering him with the heat and sharpness of Dean’s frustration. Cas’s grace quivers under the onslaught. The urge to flee from this interaction is strong. Dean has never treated Cas with anything but warmth and Cas is afraid that he is about to be thrown out of Dean’s home and his life.   
If that were to happen a broken wing would be the least of his problems. A break during the process of imprinting wouldn’t kill an angel. But it would be enough to make Cas want to die at this point. His wings drop and he grabs the edge of the coffee table for support. Please don’t let this be over. I need this. I want you.   
But Dean is offering to groom him. Not telling him to leave. The shivers he sees in Dean’s soul aren’t disgust but anxiety about being refused. Cas knows he is losing this battle. Imprinting is one thing. It’s a process that can be stopped by either party if the bonding doesn’t continue well. But to do this, to allow Dean to touch him this way, there will be no going back from it. No one has ever groomed his wings but his parents or his brothers.   
Cas knows that Dean has no idea what he is asking. Even though he has had one brief interaction with an angel prior to Cas it did not involve intimacy like this. He doesn’t dwell on the hot rush of possessiveness and jealousy that come with that thought. He doesn’t know this Anna. But he wants to rip her head right off.   
He says yes to Dean’s offer. Of course he does. He’s in love.   
He thinks if he just keeps talking maybe they won’t get around to the touching. Maybe this was a bad idea.   
“There are numerous kinds of cleaning agents on the market for these purposes. They have different attributes but the cores of them are the same. They need to be able to strip off not only the grime from the daily usage of the wings and feathers; but the natural oil used to keep the feathers aligned in the first place.” Oh please oh please don’t ask where the oil comes from. “Some of the cleaners can be very expensive. They have different scents. But it really doesn’t matter. You have to find something you can live with because whatever it is you are going to be able to smell it after it’s applied and if you think it smells too strong it can be very distracting. Most of the scented cleaners are for women anyway.” I don’t even think he is listening to me. I can’t do this. I can’t do this. “So anyway, all we have is dish soap and that should be fine. My wings haven’t been groomed well in a long time and that should help with the grease stains.” Well done. Now he is going to think I’m dirty. That’s it. I am shutting my mouth.  
Cas isn’t looking when Dean first touches his wing. Too afraid his eyes will pour out the feelings he is not sure are returned. At the first gentle squeeze of Dean’s hands, the first hesitant brush of affection coming through his soul, Cas knows he made the right choice tonight. Come what may in the future, he will never regret this night of intimacy with Dean.   
He can’t help but chuckle and the spike of horror and the squeak Dean makes when he accidentally removes the first feather. It’s too funny. Bless him though, Dean keeps going and doesn’t falter again when it continues to occur. The right wing is awful. It’s itchy, achy, and sometimes down right painful. Dean tries so hard to be gentle the worry pouring off his soul is palpable. It’s just when Cas thinks he is going to have to pull away, that he can stand no more, that Dean starts humming. The worry shifting into comfort and Cas focuses all of himself on the sound of Dean’s voice and warmth of his soul. He’s so lost in the moment and the feeling that he wraps himself around his friend before he really thinks about it. Breathing in Dean’s scent and allowing his strength to surround and support Cas. Don’t fuck this up. Father, please don’t let me fuck this up.   
Cas brushes through the oiling portion of the event as fast has be can. It has to seem just absolutely bizarre to a human and gross. He doesn’t want to see disgust on Dean’s face. Cas has never really considered himself a lucky individual. Tonight proves he might have been right in his assumption. Dean looks into the bedroom area and then back at Cas. Dean is anything but stupid. It feels to Cas like all the blood in his body has rushed to his face. 

“So you’re self lubricating?”

When Dean rubs his hands over the oil gland for the first time Cas seriously contemplates that he might orgasm in his pants. It has never been sexual, never felt like this. When he thinks about it later he thinks it must be because of the imprinting. But Cas isn’t thinking about much other than the feeling of being taken care of and a low burn of desire coming from both of them. He knows he is moaning, he can’t help it. When Dean asks him about the kinky angel sex his first thought is YES, PLEASE. But he manages to control himself. He is ready to fall asleep wrapped in a ball around Dean by the time it is over. When he offers to help him again Cas bubbles with happiness only to turn and face Dean, his face covered with a streak of the oil from Cas’s gland.   
The response is immediate. The hind brain portion of Cas’s head surges to the forefront and demands that Cas claim what has been marked as his. There is an undercurrent of mine mine mine mine. Dean simply has to wash that off. There is no other way. They have skipped too many steps in the processes, Dean has no clue what is going on, and Cas is not ready, he’s not ready to complete this. To bind himself totally to a human with such an abbreviated lifespan. What if Dean changes his mind?  
When he hears the bathroom door open he tries to wipe away the tears. He knows that Dean doesn’t mean it as rejection, he knows that he only washed it off because he was told to do so. But Cas’s grace rolls and tosses at the thought that his potential is removing evidence of his claim. Cas is shell-shocked into silence when Dean returns to the bed in the same state he left it. He doesn’t speak and neither does Dean but his grace rushes toward Dean’s soul and is welcomed completely.   
Cas stares at the kitchen utensils with dread. Making breakfast seemed to be an appropriate way to thank Dean. He had read in a book on human culture that breakfast in bed was an appropriate custom during wooing. Cas has no idea how to make breakfast. It’s not that he doesn’t eat. He loves to eat. He just can’t cook. Last time he tried he lit not just the kitchen but the living room on fire in the place he and Gabriel were sharing. Burned some of the feathers off of Gabriel’s wings in the process of putting it out, too. He is pretty sure that Gabriel hosed him down with the fire extinguisher just to be mean. It had taken a week to get all of that stuff out of his feathers.   
Off the coffee shop I go then.   
By the end of the next month there isn’t an angel is a fifty mile radius that would even risk bumping into Dean at the grocery store. Between the oil and the continued joining of Cas’s grace to his soul Dean’s whole being might as well be a lit up sign that says PROPERTY OF CASTIEL in neon flashing lights. Cas tries not to enjoy it. He really does. A bonus being that even though humans can’t see what angels see they are obviously picking up on something. No one approaches Dean anymore. Which is great as far as Cas is concerned. Not that Dean ever took them up on their offers. Still, the less competition the better.   
Cas will swear to the end of his life that the biggest bonus about being with Dean is that Dean comes with a side of Sam. Sam is bright and delightful. He is studying angels as part of his graduate program and examining the way that these two cultures are intermingling. Cas is sure that he is a fascinating science experiment on the one hand for Sam. But true to Dean’s description, Sam is warm, welcoming, and kind. Cas enjoys their interactions a great deal. He doesn’t miss the way Dean’s soul swells with happiness every time he finds out that Cas and Sam are conversing. 

“My lease ended two months ago.”

Getting Dean to buy the house with him was easy. Moving them into one bedroom was actually Dean’s idea. Sleeping together every night is wonderful. But Cas needs sex. He needs it, he wants it, and he doesn’t understand why Dean won’t just give it to him. As the tension continues to grow Cas goes through periods of withdrawing. He tries intermittently to gain some distance within this growing bond. Dean is an ass half of the time. Looking back he thinks it might have been because Dean could feel something happening but was unable to pinpoint what was wrong. Finally being able to fly again is wonderful. But all he wants is Dean.   
He finally breaks down to Sam one night when Dean is still at work. Sam has some understanding of bonding from school and though he is kind enough to not directly ask Cas about it, it’s pretty clear Sam can tell what is going on. He is clear that Dean is not going to make a path for Cas to follow. Not because he doesn’t want to, but because he has no idea how to do this either. Sam encourages Cas to make the first move.   
Cas is pretty sure that Sam meant something other than pinning his naked would be lover down in the shower and yelling at him. But you work with what you’ve got. He tore off the shower curtain just for show. It worked too, Cas felt the spike of lust across their bond clearly. By the time Dean joined him in the kitchen Cas was sure things were going to work out.   
They began a slow process of intimacy. Kissing and touching one another, finding what each other liked. Cas had been concerned about involving his wings in their physical relationship. Turns out that Dean didn’t have any such issues. Once he found out that most of Cas’s really erogenous zones involved his wings and specifically near his oil glands Dean rolled forward like it was something he had worked with his whole life. As irritating as his lover could be when he wanted Dean was never anything but completely available when it came to making love.   
As sweet and encompassing as the physical act could be, Cas is feeling more and more like there was something he is reaching for and just not obtaining. It’s so frustrating. He can feel his grace pushing and rolling against Dean’s soul as though it is searching for something that it never finds. Cas is starting to think that this is it for them. That though imprinted Cas will never know the completion of this bond. Maybe human souls just can not accomplish what was necessary for the mating to be complete. It’s something he had never considered during the process. What if he spends the rest of his life searching for something that is just not there?   
He gets his answer when he least expects it. Trying to move past his worry and be happy with what he can have. When Dean returns from visiting Sam, Cas offers himself to Dean totally. They have never done this before. Pretty much everything else mind you. But he can feel Dean’s excitement at the thought of actually being inside Cas. It is slow and careful and wonderful. As Dean slides into Cas’s body he feels his grace surge up and around Dean’s soul. Cas sobs with frustration. They just can’t get any closer and it is not enough, it’s never going to be enough. He hears Dean asking him to open his eyes whispering   
“I love you. Look at me, look at me baby.”   
When he does he feels something in Dean’s soul part and open. Cas pours his grace into that opening with everything he has, completing their bond, claiming Dean as his mate, and binding his life to his lovers. He orgasms without ever being touched and blacks out. It takes him a month to talk Dean into making love with him that way again. Having your lover pass out in the middle of sex can be pretty traumatizing. 

“I have a turkey in the dryer.” 

If Dean gives him one more excuse for not flying with him Cas thinks he will scream and tear out his own feathers. He just doesn’t get it. For all purposes they are a completely bonded pair. His wonderful, frustrating, often ignorant and annoying lover will simply not consent to the flight that would allow their mated status to be publicly claimed. Cas thought initially that he was just being difficult as, lets face it, that is the way of Dean Winchester. But as time progresses it seems more like refusal not avoidance. Time to switch to plan B. 

“Dude. You drive me nuts sometimes. You know that, right?”

Cas thinks of himself as pretty smart. As far as angels go he is resourceful, intelligent, and frankly an opportunist. If he wasn’t he would have never left the fold of his family to begin with and certainly would not have managed to make a life for himself among humans. That’s why it is so embarrassing when he realizes that Dean has no clue what he is asking him for. Why should he? Humans go to Vegas when they want to get married. They buy rings and pick out pretty clothing. They invite 500 people to watch them pronounce their love to one another. Half of those people they probably don’t even like. Then, three years later, they get divorced, and do it all over again with someone else. In his worst moments he thinks that for humans everything is disposable, even your soul, if the price is right.   
Dean’s immediate acceptance of his proposal, once voiced, is comforting. His mate’s soul shines with the idea surging forward toward Cas’s grace and wrapping around him the best it can. The flight is brief, but it is enough for Cas. He feels accomplished and contented until halfway through the ride home. When the itching starts it is unbearable. He thinks, perhaps, it is the cold aggressive stance he maintains that keeps the urgent care staff from just laughing in their faces. There is not enough calamine in the world to end this itching. Sadly for Cas though, it won’t be the last time his wings are stained pink. 

“You are gigantic.” 

Cas has been looking forward to meeting Sam in person for a long while. This most important part of his mate’s life. They are already good friends even before the visit so sharing space with his brother in law is no hardship. They quickly fall into a pattern of affectionate banter and gentle teasing. Often ganging up on Dean and watching the spectacular fall out. The prank war is something Cas struggles to understand. There is nothing like this in his culture. In fact, the idea of torturing your loved ones and publicly embarrassing them to show your affection would be something just not tolerated. But his boys love it. So Cas pays attention. He learns the rules of the game.   
Sam’s soul is warm and layered. Where Dean’s is sharp and quickly changing, Sam is more fluid. There is a gentle movement from one emotion to the next. Sam wears his insecurities in his soul though they do not show on his face. He is a man who needs someone to love him, to accept him. Sam needs a mate. It pains Cas that he knows no one to bond him to. Human or angel alike, Sam will make a strong mate for someone.   
Bobby is thrilled to give Sam the job at the salvage yard. He had finally seen enough of Becky. Literally, and let her go. Chuck was fine with it. Everyone thought he looked a little relieved actually. The girl was a little clingy. Sam’s soul alight with relief when he handed over the keys. Dean is thrilled. Sam’s family; you take care of what’s yours. Dean’s gratitude is boundless and Cas’s wings have not looked this good in years. Scars and all, Dean caught him preening in the bathroom the next day but was kind enough not to tease.   
The first touch of Sam’s hand on his wing is unexpected. Cas is still not sure there was even a leaf in there to be dug out. For a second he struggled with how to tell Sam his touch was unwelcome, but then he notices the hesitance in his soul and the determination. Sam is making a point, not an overture. He had forgotten how much of his culture Sam understood. But how do you groom someone who doesn’t have wings?  
Over the next week he improvises where he can. Sam is patient and doesn’t comment even when Cas realizes later that some of what he attempts would have been considered inappropriate by other peoples standards. He doesn’t correct Sam on his wing handling though he goes between poking and petting with no consistency. They work it out. Sam’s soul glows happily as he feels Cas’s acceptance and Cas’s grace surges with a brotherly affection for the first time since he lost Gabriel.   
Time with Sam helps him heal many an old wound he had forgotten he carried.  
Dean is acting like an ass. On the first day of week three when Sam finds him in the kitchen sullenly nursing a cup of coffee alone, Cas is feeling dejected and pathetic. It must show. Sam simply says “I’ll fix it.” and storms out of the house.   
He really needs to never underestimate Sam. That is one scary man when he wants to be. 

“I’m sorry if I’m not enough for you.” 

When Dean comes to speak to him that night Cas is relieved to feel the touch of his mate on his wings. Dean’s soul is leaking regret and something akin to shame. Cas wishes so badly that Dean could feel the presence of his grace. If he was able to then he would never doubt Cas’s intentions or interest. There will never be another for Cas. His world now begins and ends with Dean. And perhaps that is the problem. Dean floundering for some idea of Cas’s dedication and Cas thinking that he should already have the knowledge. When he pins Dean down to the bed he tries his best to get his point across. Dean responds with relief. Then humor. He can be so frustrating.   
When Sam starts pounding on the wall Cas starts thinking about the prank war again. As much as he loves Sam, he has needs.   
Dean is glowing with happiness when they wake up the day after his talk with Sam. The prospect of his brother lightening his mood enough to pull a prank not just on Sam but to include Cas as well. As bad as getting the glitter out is, and it takes a horrifically long time, it is nothing compared to the raw patch of skin the glue leaves behind on Sam’s face.   
Though Cas has to admit that it is quite funny.   
This book is wrong wrong wong. It’s irritating, in fact, how just slightly off the information is. Like Gabriel told this poor human this stuff. His brother had a knack for straight faced lying where so much of it was the truth that you were willing to believe the weird parts. Just because he looked so earnest. In any case, this book is a mess. Cas takes it on himself to correct the mistakes. If Sam is really going to pursue a career in angel/human politics and society it means he is going to have to interact with angels.   
Then he gets to the last chapter and he gives up. Dean must never read this. He tears the whole thing out and thinks about burning the whole book. Of course Sam notices. Cas is shocked when Sam agrees to not tell Dean about the mating bond. But there is something in Sam’s soul in that moment. An ache like Sam feels like he is missing something. Cas worries about Sam. Someone needs to love him.   
He should have lied when Dean asked him about his background. He didn’t expect the violent reaction from his mate to the news that Cas’s space in the angel social class network had once been quite high. His parents are well off, he had a good education. Dean would not have been considered an appropriate partner. But then Dean is human so he would never have been considered at all. That information doesn’t seem to help his mate’s distress. Sam later said it was probably like pouring gasoline on a fire. Dean is so angry about this tiny thing that doesn’t matter at all that Cas finally just starts laughing at the insanity of it and once he starts he just can’t stop. Dean stomps off in a rage, but the make up sex is awesome.   
Cas is unable to dissuade him from the formal courting. It’s a ridiculous gesture being that they are already married. But it warms Cas up inside to see his mate so willing to stretch his sometimes ridged boundaries. Dean works out most of it on his own. He is mindful of Cas’s personal space, avoids direct staring, though there are some difficulties with Dean trying to do everything for him.   
“Dean, I am not the woman in this relationship!”   
“I’m not saying you are. But you’re the person being courted so I’m supposed to be doing this stuff for you.”  
It makes sense even if Cas is pretty sure Dean is enjoying forcing Cas into the role a female angel would occupy. He knows Cas hates it.   
The flight of intent is god-awful mess. After two attempts at it on ground level neither of them can stop laughing long enough to get through it to part two. Cas decides to skip it all together. Grabbing his mate close to him, Cas takes to the air; Dean a relaxed, warm weight against his body. His hands stroking up and down Cas’s back during flight.   
Two weeks later he can feel the weight of Dean’s anguish and the hum of Sam’s anxiety before he opens the door to their home. He finds his husband sitting quietly at the kitchen table a new copy of the damned book by his side. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”  
“Please don’t be mad. I wasn’t certain what you would think. I didn’t want you to be upset or to feel that you had limited me in any way. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. It’s what I want.”  
“What else are you hiding?”  
“Nothing. I’m not hiding anything. I didn’t mean to hide this I just didn’t know what to do, what to say to make you accept this. I was scared. Please, Dean.”  
“This whole time. This whole time it was more than what I can understand. You can see my soul? You can feel my soul? I’m bonded to you and I can’t even tell? I don’t even know it? How is that fair? How can you be okay with this?”  
“So sorry. Please just don’t leave. Please, I can’t be without you, Dean. I can’t.” I need you. I belong with you.   
Dean’s soul is so still. Flat, like there is nothing going on there. Cas panics. He’s never been more afraid in his life. Loosing Dean is not an option, not something he can contemplate. He starts to feel cold all over. The brunt of the feeling hits him when he has his eyes closed. Dean coming across the room staring at him with all the concentration he has, hands clenched, muscles tight. But the surge of love and affection battering against his grace is more than he usually feels. It is a deliberate action from his mate. For the first time, Cas feels Dean reach for him with his soul. He didn’t think humans could do that. Cas reaches out and wraps his arms around Dean, shaken.   
“Can you feel me? Can I feel you?”  
“I can feel you. I don’t know if you can feel me.”   
“Try it. I want you to try it.”  
He pushes back against Dean’s soul. Pressing and shoving harder than he has ever attempted before. There is a flash of light at one point skittering across his mate soul. Dean smiles, arms squeezing Cas tightly, as he whispers “There you are. I’ve got you now.”   
Mine.   
Cas contemplates his bright pink wings with a smile. Dean’s phone call to Sam in the background indicating this is temporary. He goes to work with his head held high. Confronted by cat calls and whistles. His response is only   
“What? I think it brings out my eyes.”  
Prank wars are fun he decides. Dean is suspicious and he should be. Cas has been working on his plan for two months. He treated it like he treats all things important to him; with lots of care and detailed planning.   
Dean is the first to get hit. It took him a month to convince Bobby to help. With Chuck as their wing man (so to speak) they manage to distract Dean long enough to get the impala towed away only to have Dean think she was stolen. Three days of worrying about the condition of his car follows. When Bobby says they found it he almost can’t keep a straight face on the way to the salvage yard. Once in the garage it’s even worse. Bobby must have dug out the worst looking wreck of a 1967 impala he could find and then beat the hell out of it. Dean comes close to tears before they have Chuck drive out in his baby ensuring everything is okay. Bobby and Chuck flee. Dean just stares at Cas open mouthed and wild eyed for a full minute before he asks   
“Dude, what are you going to do to Sam?”   
The phone call comes a week later around mid-semester exams. Sam won’t even talk to Cas. He just yells at Dean   
“Tell Cas he wins.”  
“Cas, what did you do?”   
“I corrected Sam’s text books on angel/human relationships.”  
“Then why is he so mad?”  
“Well I might have gotten a few things wrong along the way. Embellished a bit here and there. You know, to make the topic more interesting.”  
“So you sent my brother back to school with a made up text book.”  
“Pretty much.”  
“Baby, I love you. You’re the king.”  
It’s good to be king.


	6. Chapter 6

Everything had been going great for them. Dean and Cas had come to terms with the whole bonding thing and after repeated conversations about the future and what it might mean they gave up and settled into a easy routine. Even if it was a little weird now that Sam was gone back to school and the house was empty. Cas went through a period they would refer to later as Sam withdrawal. It turns out that angels have pretty communal lifestyles. It’s rare for families to go very far from one another. So to have Sam all the way back at school instead of one room down the hall was hard. Dean passed the time between bouts of grumpy husband practicing trying to commune with Cas’s grace.   
It was tricky and exhausting. Sometimes nothing happened and Dean would flop back on the bed in disgust with himself. Stupid useless soul can’t even work right. But when it worked, even if for just a few moments, Cas lit up like Christmas time and Dean would be able to feel it like there was actually light there. There was so much love. It’s one thing to have someone say it to you, a whole different thing to be able to feel it wrapping around your being. 

So yeah, things were pretty awesome. Until the Devil showed up.

Ok, so he’s not really the Devil. Cas assures Dean that Lucifer is a fairly common name in angelic society. But the guy is rigid, aloof, smarmy, and just plain weird. Removed, Dean guesses, like nothing really touches him. That and if Dean had ever thought Cas’s wings looked bad, wow, this guy looked like no one had given a damn enough about him to groom his wings in like two thousand years or something. He thinks that they might have been a sleek grey, maybe, back when they were taken care of, but now they are chalky, torn, and seem damaged somehow. Dean’s not asking about it. The Devils wings are his own problem. 

That and Bobby is pissed. Turns out that when Cas told Bobby no one would ever come looking for him, he had been wrong. Not that he knows this Lucifer guy. He showed up looking for Cas because he had heard a rumor that there was an angel working at a human salvage yard. He didn’t even know Cas’s name. Now Bobby is afraid he is running some kind of daycare center for lost and lonely angels. Dean tried telling him that Bobby did not have to hire the Devil. But Cas had worked out so well he figured he might as well give him a shot. 

Lucifer knows nothing about cars. He stares at them like they are foreign, distasteful objects, with no purpose. It makes Dean want to SCREAM; the level of disrespect alone that he showed the impala by dropping his soda onto her hood during lunch one day. For a minute there Dean had thought he was going to need some medication to survive just working with the guy. 

Then Cas brings him home. 

“What is he doing here?”

“He needs a place to stay. I thought he could use Sam’s room.”

“He is NOT sleeping in SAMMY’S room. No way!”

So for now, the Devil is sleeping on his sofa. 

Cas said it was either him, or Dean, sleeping out there and Dean knows the couch is just not that comfortable. 

For his part, at least, weirdo angelic Satan doesn’t complain. 

He’s a hell of a receptionist too. In person, the guy is a mess but he gives great phone. By the end of the second week he has handled all of Bobby’s outstanding payments, restructured the schedule to accommodate Jo, who just had a baby, and bodily removed an angry trucker, who wanted something that was just not possible, from the property single handedly without breaking a sweat. Though Dean is pretty sure the trucker, who was about ten foot eleven and weighed in at nine hundred pounds, wet his pants while he was bring dragged off the lot. Whether he likes him or not, Dean is not above giving the Devil his due. 

Sam is a ball of excitement over the phone when he finds out. He tries to change his plans to go to his parents over Thanksgiving. Dean’s not having any of it. Sam’s not coming home until Dean is good and sure this guy is on the level. Not that Dean is really sure how he’s going to find that out. Sam’s pissed that the new house boy is sleeping on the sofa; telling Dean and then Cas, when Dean refuses to listen, to put the guy in his room until the Christmas holiday and they will work it out from there. 

So Cas makes room, cleaning up Sam’s stuff, and Lucifer starts sleeping in Sam’s room. His reaction to the offer of getting off the couch is even weird. He creeps into Sam’s room like he is waiting for someone to jump out at him and spends a long time just picking up Sam’s stuff and staring at it.  
“Why is he doing that?”

“Doing what, Dean?”

“Manhandling all of Sam’s stuff.”

“He’s not manhandling it. He’s just getting a feel for Sam’s presence from his belongings.”

“So you’re saying he can see Sam’s soul from his left over, forgotten, dirty socks?”

“Dean, be less of an ass, please. You have reached my limit for the day.”

Cas and his freaky new angel friend get along fine. The guy doesn’t talk much, at least not when Dean is around. Hell, he barely even makes eye contact with Dean. But he settles in and stays out of the way. It starts to bother Dean after the first month that he seems almost constantly sad. After three failed attempts at getting the guy to join him in conversation about anything Dean goes to the encyclopedia Cas-tanica. 

“He hates me doesn’t he?”

“Dean, you’re being foolish.”

“He won’t even look at me, much less talk to me.” There is this surge of anger in Dean. “It’s because we’re mated, isn’t it? The dickhead looks down on us because you picked a human for mate!”

He feels Cas’s grace brush against his soul wrapping him up in warmth. Dean relaxes against his husband. It is so hard to stay mad when Cas does this. He closes his eyes and pushes outward stretching until he feels the gentle pressure of Cas’s grace solidify into a solid bond with his soul. It’s not something Dean can do for long. Not yet anyway, but he works at it. The benefits of feeling their connection far outweigh the effort to get there. When he pulls back into his body he drowsily opens his eyes, smiling contentedly at his mate. 

Cas reaches over and slides his hands up under Dean’s shirt to rub down his side and over the small of his back as Dean rolls onto his stomach and turns his head toward him.   
“He doesn’t want to offend me, Dean. That’s why he is so distant with you. He is in our home, which makes me the dominate angel. He doesn’t want to risk expulsion from here by upsetting me or you.” 

“So he’s avoiding me out of respect?”

“Something like that. There are no human/angel pairings that I know of. I’m sure he is fascinated by our bond. But he is also completely not sure how to treat you. You don’t exactly follow angel protocol.”

“Oh. So where do we go from here?” 

“I’ll talk to him.” 

Dean wants to ask about what the talk will entail but Cas has rolled him over and Dean finds himself totally distracted from that course of questioning by experiencing all the other wonderful things Cas does with his mouth. 

Over the course of the next few days there are numerous hushed conversations that take place between the two angels in Dean’s home. By the third time he walks into a room and both parties stop talking to just stare at him, Dean has had enough.

“Let’s go get some pie. I’m hungry.” Cas is sliding off the couch before Dean is finished speaking and Dean takes a breath. “You coming, Luc?” 

Dean doesn’t miss the bright flash of pleasure that shines in both their eyes. 

Turns out, the Devil prefers apple pie. Forbidden fruit and all; Dean should have known.  
It’s six in the morning when Dean has his first honest to god conversation with his new housemate. He is all but crawling into the kitchen to start the coffee when he realizes that no only is the coffee ready, cups poured and all, but that he is not alone in the kitchen. 

“I wanted to thank you for your hospitality. I understand that this is not a preferable situation for you.”

Wow, he is formal. Dean’s not sure they even speak the same language.

“Dude, it’s cool. It’s just going to get a lot more cramped around here when Sam comes home from school.”

“I know that you would prefer that I not stay in his room. I can find other arraignments if that would be preferable to you.”

Dean wants to say yes please get out of my house. But he hasn’t missed the connection Cas is developing with this other angel. They are building something between them. Something that Dean hopes will become something like family. Cas won’t like it if Luc leaves. His mate deserves to have a brother too. 

“It’s fine. You don’t need to leave. But you will have to sleep on the couch again. It’ll only be temporary. Sam only has three weeks off and then he has to go back.”   
There is a pause and he sees Lucifer’s hands tighten on the coffee cup, his head bowed, before he looks back up at Dean. When he does Dean would swear there is actually a little bit of life in those eyes. More than he has seen since he has met this angel. 

“Thank you again. You are being very kind.”

“Man, there is nothing kind about me. I’m an asshole.” And Dean chuckles at the look of horror that crosses Luc’s face before the mask he wears cracks a little and he chuckles in return. 

“I’m going to groom him.”

Dean’s head hits the bottom of a beat up Ford hard the next day in the salvage yard. 

There is no way Cas just said that.

“The hell you will, excuse me?”

“Dean, we have been through this and you read the book yourself. It’s not a sex act. He is in need of grooming and we are the closest thing to family he has.”

“So you’re telling me there is no greater context to this cleaning than less dirty wings?” Oh hell, he is NOT thinking about this. No way is this gonna happen. Cas is pausing which Dean translates into yes there is more to this and you aren’t going to like it. But you will go along with it cuz you love me and I know it. 

“It’s an offer to become a member of our family unit. To no longer be a guest but to have a home with us.”

Yeah, Dean knew he wasn’t going to like it. 

Turns out neither did Lucifer. He blushes, jumps up from the table, gathers his wings in his hands and presses himself up against the nearest wall as soon as Cas brings it up. Not exactly the reaction Dean was expecting. But even though Dean knows it is just a weird ass angel thing it still sounds like a solid offer for a threesome to his own ears, so maybe something go lost in the translation. 

“I would like for you to at least consider our offer.” Is all that Cas gets out before Luc is gone. And Dean means like out of the house and up in the air gone. He comes back a day later and Dean isn’t even sure he landed in all that time. Luc limps back into the kitchen dragging his left wing along the ground behind him. When he sees them he looks away at the floor and whispers gruffly “I’m not ready, not yet.” But he doesn’t move out. Dean holds Cas as tight as he can that night while Cas has nightmares and calls out Gabriel’s name again and again. 

Dean has been keeping Sam appraised of all the super duper angel capers going on at home. Sam has a good Thanksgiving with his parents. Right up until they tell him to come home for Christmas and Sam tells them he already has plans. After that it must have gone down hill. Sam is back at school before the break is over, hanging with his crazy ass roommate, Ash. That guy is just nuts, a genius, but nuts. Sam’s going to drive in from school in a month so Dean needs to figure out what is going on with the two bird brains before then. 

It was the gum that pushed him over the edge. 

Chuck has a bad habit of chewing gum non-stop. He says it helps his anxiety. No big deal until he left some on the armrest of the chair in the office and it got embedded in Luc’s feathers. When they all ride in from work that night Luc takes to the bathroom for over two hours. He comes out, looking disgusted, drops to the floor in the living room and says to the armchair “I assume your offer is still good?” Which Dean guesses is as close to please, God, help me as they are ever going to get. 

It takes almost all night to get the shit out even with both of them working at it. Dean’s aware there is a whole level of communication going on between Cas and Luc that he can’t hear and wouldn’t understand. He tries not to jerk when Luc reaches up to groom some of Cas’s right wing in return. He guesses it gives him something to do while he is sitting there. It is tentative and halting. Like the guy hasn’t been shown this sort of kindness in forever. He turns to Dean when he’s reached all of Cas’s wing that he can and flounders. 

“I don’t know what to do for you.”

Dean just blinks at him. 

When the seconds tick by and Dean doesn’t say anything Luc looks over at Cas, who looks back and Dean, and gives him a grace filled slap up the back of his head. 

“It’s okay.” Dean stutters out “You don’t owe me anything.”

“That’s not true. I owe you everything.” 

Maybe Cas is right and he’s not the Devil after all. 

Lucifer’s wings are still a mess when they are done. He slides off the bedroom to oil them as best he can on his own. 

Cas and Dean clean up and Dean spends the early hours of the morning grooming and oiling his mates wings until they shine and then trying not to gasp too loud as Cas rolls him over and slides deep inside him. He can’t hide the relief in his soul when Cas leans down and whispers “Mine, mine, mine.” into his ear.

Dean was prepared for the next day to be extra weird. But it’s just a regular old day. Luc asks on the way to work about possible ways to pay Chuck back for his inappropriate gum placement, leading to a lively discussion on the joys of pranking. Which, much to Dean and Cas’s surprise, Luc seems to love the idea of. Chuck is in for some serious shit.

Over the course of the next two weeks Dean learns that Luc has more personality than he gave him credit for. He’s intelligent, articulate, imaginative, has a wicked sense of humor when he’s alone with them. Add a few more people though and he wilts. 

“They aren’t family.”

“So they’re beneath you?”

“No, I just don’t trust them.”

“Dude you’ve got to give people a chance some time.”

“Dean, I’ve tried that before. It didn’t go well for me.”

Sometimes Dean thinks he is never going to get a straight answer to anything ever again. It’s worth it though, Cas hasn’t had a nightmare in weeks.

Sam comes home from school just like they planned. It’s an awkward transition. He and Lucifer greet each other kindly but Luc is distant and Sam thinks he doesn’t like him.   
The house feels way too small. 

Dean has to give his brother credit, he doesn’t give up. When Dean finds Sam the next morning he is in the back yard waving the morning paper around with Luc standing against a tree just behind him. Dean would think he wasn’t interested in anything Sam was saying if it weren’t for the slow smile that spreads across his face when Sam turns away. Cas wraps his arms around Dean and looks out at both of them from over Dean’s shoulder. 

“They’re well matched don’t you think?”

And it hits Dean. What he has been missing here. 

“Cas! You are NOT going to set my brother up with the Devil.”

“Sorry baby, but I’m pretty sure I already did.”


	7. Chapter 7

Part 7

Becky shows up at work and tells Chuck that she’s pregnant. One panic attack later, when he is sitting on the porch at Bobby’s breathing into a paper bag and gasping for his inhaler, she smiles and walks away after laughing in his face and telling him “The Devil made me do it.”  
Chuck never leaves his gum anywhere again, ever. Lucifer waits until they get home that night to ask if he did it right. Sam’s afraid to tell him yes because he doesn’t want to be the next person on that list. It took him a week of frantic phone calls and emails to discover that Cas had made certain his professors knew it was a joke and that his thesis wasn’t in jeopardy. He’s not sure he can go through that again.   
He’s not sold on the new guy yet. Cas has a warm air about it him, a soft undertone that has always drawn Sam in and made him feel comfortable. Luc isn’t like that. He watches Sam all the time, sometimes he doesn’t even look away when Sam turns around and stares right back at him. He’s distant and treats Sam a little too carefully. Like Sam’s going to crack at any given second.   
He messed up his room too. Well, not really, everything is still exactly where Sam left it last summer. That’s just weird. Who lives in a room for over a month and doesn’t move anything?  
Dean seems to take it all in stride. Sam’s thinking maybe Dean’s tolerance level for weird ass shit is way higher than his. He watches them from the window as Cas and Dean wash the impala. Dean trying to slosh Cas with soapy water and Cas doing a delicate dance to try and keep his wings dry. It’s cold out there but the sun is shining. Dean misses the smirk on Cas’s face, but Sam catches it, laughing as Cas turns the hose on Dean and sprays a stripe of freezing water right up the front of him all the way to his face. The chase is on then, Cas running around the back yard laughing as Dean charges after him dripping wet, dragging the bucket. He manages to trip Cas long enough to pour the whole bucket of soapy water over him. Cas stands there, soapy and dripping, looking for all the world like a kicked puppy, until Dean cracks and wraps his arms around him in a hug. Cas pulls him close and unfurls his wings as far as they will go, flapping them wildly. He covers every square inch of Dean in the same sudsy mess he’s wearing and the both burst out laughing and collapse into the grass.   
“They are disgustingly sweet, aren’t they?”  
Sam turns and sees Lucifer also watching what is turning into an epic cage match of wrestling in the back yard.   
“Yeah. It’s gross. But I’ve never seen Dean look so happy.”  
“His soul is very…..fulfilled.”  
“Must be nice.”  
“I wouldn’t know.” And Luc is wandering back into the living room, his head buried in a book of Sam’s from school.   
Sam turns back to the window, looking at his brother flat on his back out in the winter sun. He says to himself “Yeah, me neither.”   
Sam doesn’t turn around so he misses the way Lucifer looks up from his book and stares at him.   
The weather turns to shit after that. Sam is forced into doing his Christmas shopping sloshing through grey days and inclement weather. He and Dean have a five dollar gift limit from way back when they first were getting to know one another. Dean is easy to shop for. He’s going to love whatever as long as all of them are together to celebrate. Sam tries not to think about how he wishes he had someone to be that happy with. The hardest part, besides the weather, is trolling the mall with a standoffish angel. Luc does not like the mall, not that Sam does either. But there is a bookshop in the back that has a book Cas wants and Sam won dibs on who got to get him that as a gift. Luc tagged along to help him haul home the decorations and groceries.   
So of course, because Sam has no luck at all, his piece of shit car breaks down five blocks from the house. This leaves them both trudging home arms loaded with stuff, when it starts to rain. Sam shakes his head at the first few drops. I have seriously pissed someone off somewhere. It’s cold, he’s cranky, and now wet. It takes him a minute to when he can still see the rain he’s not getting wet. Sam looks up and sees a grey wing spread out over the top of his head. Sam turns to Lucifer only to find him wrapping his other wing around the bags he is carrying. He doesn’t look at Sam, just keeping his eyes plastered down the street. Sam opens his mouth to say; well he doesn’t know what to say. So he shuts it again and walks faster.   
Luc is soaked and chilled by the time they get home. Sam leaves him next to the front door and brings back every towel he can find in the house. He finds Luc struggling out of his coat and trying to kick off his shoes. Sam throws him a towel and turns up the heat in the house. On the way by the kitchen he stops to get some coffee and finds the note.  
Had to go to work tonight, Bobby needed some help. We’ll be back later. Don’t wait up.  
D & C  
“Luc, the guys are out for the night with Bobby. We are on our own for dinner.” Sam rounds the corner back into the front entryway and stops dead. Luc is still dripping water everywhere, but he has managed to take off everything but his pants and is rubbing a towel through his hair. His wings are spread out and dragging the ground and when he looks up at Sam, with his rumpled hair and narrow eyes, Sam feels a blast of attraction he wasn’t expecting. The guy is hot.   
As soon as he feels it, he knows Lucifer does too. Luc’s eyes widen, his breath hitches, and his lips part. Sam is torn between running away and finding out how easily Luc would open up for Sam to kiss him the way he wants to. Sam drops the coffee cup, stumbling backwards into the kitchen stuttering something about a dishtowel.   
He’s not lucky enough to be ignorant about this. He knows that angels can see, for lack of a better word, the souls of humans. So even though Sam isn’t certain what exactly Luc saw, he knows he saw something that exposed what Sam was feeling. It’s an uneven playing field. He and Luc are not what Sam would classify as close. So the question he has to ask himself is Do I want to be?  
It takes him about five minutes to decide that the answer is yes. Now it’s just a matter of how to accomplish it. He cleans up the coffee while he tries to make a game plan. Luc is sitting the middle of the living room floor surrounded by wet towels as he combs out the feathers on his left wing the best he can. Sam hands him another cup of coffee and sits down on the floor across from him. He takes a deep breath.   
“Can I help you with that?” He’s only here for a few weeks. Maybe directness is required here. Lucifer hesitantly extends his wing and Sam thinks this might be easier than he thought.  
He and Luc had talk themselves to sleep on the sofa together. It’s a tight fit. But Sam’s not ready to move this to the bedroom. Sam’s not sure when Dean and Cas got home. He finds them lounging in their room Cas’s head pillowed on top of Dean’s sleeping chest.   
“You two looked cozy out there.” Stupid angel brother in laws.  
“Thank you captain obvious.” But there is no heat there. Sam knows that Cas only wants the best for him.   
“Cas, what’s the protocol on this? Where do I go from here?”  
“You groomed him.” It’s a statement, not a question. Cas is a smart guy.  
“A little, yeah.” Sam’s trying to ignore the blush that is coming up on his face. Cas grins and reaches out a wing to ruffle his hair.   
“It’s up to him now, Sam. Follow his lead.”  
“And get out of our room. Trying to sleep here.” Dean’s voice is groggy but his smile is open and relaxed. He reaches out and squeezes Sam’s arm tightly before letting go and rolling over closer to Cas. Sam hears them talking in hushed tones through the door later. Cas explaining the details of the imprinting and bonding process from the angel side to Dean. There’s some laughter and pauses in the conversation that Sam is sure equals kissing. He catches one really clear statement from Dean.   
“You’re sure he will take care of Sam, right?”  
Sam loves his brother, so much. Even in the center of the happiest time of his life, Dean is reaching out and trying to make sure Sam is happy too. He doesn’t know how he got so lucky.   
Dean got him gay porn for Christmas.   
Maybe I need to revise my take on lucky when it comes to Dean.   
Cas found Sam a vintage copy of a book he needs for his thesis that is out of print. Sam got Cas that book he wanted. Cas gives Dean a very small key. Dean looks at him with eyes full of questions but Sam doesn’t get any answers about that one.   
There is a story in there somewhere, he’s sure.   
Dean gives Luc a headband with devil horns on it. To everyone’s shock he puts them on and wears them happily for the rest of the day.   
“Dude, you don’t have to wear those. He meant it as a joke.”  
Luc slides the metal headband off and turns it over in his hands slowly.   
“Your brother made this for me Sam. It might be a joke. But that doesn’t make it insignificant.”  
The work on the band is delicate. The horns are precise. Sam didn’t know Dean could do something like this. Lucifer slides the band over Sam’s head and settles it gently. Sam stops breathing as he slides in for their first kiss.   
Right as their lips touch Dean yells “PUDDING” from right behind Luc in the doorway. Sam squeals and tries to climb over Lucifer to kill his brother. They end up in a pile on the floor full of hands slapping and wings smashing against each other with Cas trying to defend Dean from the irritated opposition. The christmas tree gets knocked over in the process and Dean declares it “Best Christmas EVER.”  
The day comes to close with Dean and Cas, a little tipsy, slow dancing in the hallway, while Dean sings Christmas carols softly into his husbands ear. There’s a comforting feeling of love and a sense of family settled in over their little house and Sam’s chest aches with the thought of going back to school and leaving this all behind.   
Luc slides the box across the couch to him without comment. When he opens it he sees a single grey feather in the box. Sam knows it’s one of Luc’s, but this feather isn’t damaged. It didn’t fall out on its own. He looks up and Cas and Dean have stopped dancing. They’re staring back at Sam, Dean’s look is serious, Cas’s face glossed over in delight.   
“You pulled this out?”  
“Yes.” The whispered response from his left side.  
“This had to have hurt. Why would you hurt yourself for me?”  
“It was unpleasant. But I didn’t do it for you. I did it for your family.”  
Sam sees Dean cock his head at Cas who turns to look at him.   
“What is that?” Dean asks.   
“Sam knows what it is.” Cas is certain, and Sam does know. A public gift of a forcibly removed feather is a statement of intent. Lucifer is asking to court him. Formally, he would need permission from Sam’s family. Said family being Dean and Cas.   
He turns to angel sitting next to him.   
“Shouldn’t you have given this to them?”  
“In my culture, yes. But you’re not an angel and I would never presume to proceed with this unless I had your consent.”  
It’s a nice balance of their two needs. Luc gets the acknowledgement that this is acceptable from his family and Sam gets to say he accepts it as well.  
“What do you want me to say, Sammy?”   
Sam doesn’t look at Dean when he answers. He is secure enough to know his brother will back his play, no matter what. He keeps his eyes on Luc’s face.  
“Tell him yes you idiot.”  
There is an unofficial indoctrination into the family; a tradition that must be maintained. Dean is going to prank the Devil. Sam knows it, Cas knows it, hell even Lucifer knows it. Over the next week leading up to New Years Luc endures a gauntlet of abuse from Dean.   
Itching powder in his underwear.  
Spackle in his toothpaste.  
Sam doesn’t even want to know what Dean put in his wing cleaner.  
Dean ate all of Lucifer’s favorite food in the house. Even the stuff he hated so that every time Luc goes to find something it’s gone.  
He covers Luc’s hand with shaving cream and then tickles his nose while he sleeps until he smashes himself in the face with it.  
Luc never says a word, he never gets angry, never flinches. Sam’s impressed. When they get out of the car to go into Bobby’s New Year’s Bash he even holds the door of the car open for Dean to get out. Then he trips him, head first, into the mud. While Dean is sputtering and scraping crap out of his eyes, Luc leans down and says “I love you too.”   
Sam and Cas look at each other and smile.   
This just keeps getting better.


	8. Chapter 8

Part 8

It’s a communal effort to get Sam headed back to school and no one really has their heart in it. Cas bids him a warm farewell and promises that the corrections he made to his books this time are legit. Dean shoves the last of his bags into the trunk and grunts at him that they will see him before spring break. They head back to the house as Sam and Luc say their goodbyes. When he drives off Sam will notice the box of tissues in the front seat. He’ll need them.   
Dean doesn’t say anything when Luc plops down on the sofa beside him. He just hands him a beer and ignores the fact that Luc is sitting a little too close. When he shifts lower on the couch and presses the side of his head into Dean’s shoulder Dean shoots his eyes over to Cas. He gets a shrug and raised eyebrows for his troubles.   
“I’m being inappropriate, aren’t I?”  
The muffled question comes from somewhere down the side of Dean’s arm.  
“Yeah, dude, a little.”  
Luc sighs but he doesn’t move. Neither does Dean. Cas brings them pie.   
The first couple of days are rough but not impossible. Sam calls more often, sometimes he even talks to Dean. Though it bothers Dean to be shoved into the back seat he’s happy that Sam now has even more reasons to come home. Luc and Sammy stay in pretty constant communication. Sometimes Dean is banging on the wall between their bedrooms at night when Luc gets what has to be his ten thousandth text message at four in the morning.   
Cas says they haven’t started the bonding process. The whole damn thing seems overly complicated to Dean but in his defense he was unaware of what was going for most of the time it was happening to him.   
“So they’re what? BFF’s?”  
“No, they’re courting. It’s like the first few dates for humans before they decide to only see each other.”  
“WAIT wait. So that means Luc gets to see other people?”  
Nobody’s cheating on my little brother.   
“Dean, he has no intention of seeing anyone else. But yes, at this stage either party could choose to see someone else.”  
“I don’t get it.”  
“Clearly.”  
Cas can be a real ass sometimes. It’s one of the things Dean loves about him.   
“Dean, imprinting is intimate. If they had started the process and then Sam had left for school it would have been very painful for Luc. This way, he misses Sam but he doesn’t feel so broken. I would have never been able to let you go.”  
Ok. That he can understand. Dean reaches over and slides his fingers under the split in Cas’s shirt, where his wings come through, brushing his knuckles under the wing and stroking across the gland hidden there. Cas stops doing the dishes. Hell, he almost stops breathing. His wings stretch out to give Dean more room. Dean slides in closer and wraps his arms around Cas pulling him close enough for Cas to rest his head on Dean’s shoulder, warm breath puffing out against Dean’s neck. He slides his other hand around and into the left wing tugging on some of the feathers. Cas moans, shifts his feet, and clings to Dean. He works his hands over Cas’s wings tugging and stroking, finally settling at the base, where they join his back, and attacks the glands on either side in earnest. Cas keens into his neck, his knees go weak and Dean almost drops him when Cas bites down right above the collar of his t-shirt.   
Dean never gets tired of this; being able to make his husband fall apart inside the circle of his arms. Cas grinds down against his hip and Dean can feel his fingers getting wet from the oil the glands are producing.  
“I love you so much baby. You feel so good right now.” Cas is groaning and sucking on his neck so hard that Dean knows he is going to have a hickey the size of an egg when he’s done. He thinks a few more minutes of this and he can take Cas apart right here in the kitchen with all of their clothes still on. Dean shoves his hips forward to give Cas something to rub against and is sliding one damp hand down into the waistband of the back of Cas’s pants when they hear the front door open and shut.   
Fuck.   
“If you stop, I will drown you in the dishwater. I swear it on all I hold holy.”   
Dean doesn’t move. Cas huffs out a breath of frustration into his collarbone. Dean absolutely does NOT squeak when Cas just picks him up with a growled out “Hang on and don’t stop.” And carries him off the bedroom.   
The dishes are finished before they are. Luc just turns the TV up real loud.   
Dean thinks that Cas might tell him what the key is for sometime before next Christmas. It’s driving him crazy. He wears it on a chain around his neck and has spent hours trying to puzzle out what such a little key could open. He’s having no luck. In fact it’s what he is pondering the day he runs into Anna at the coffee shop.   
They have lunch. It’s weird but what in his life isn’t. Anna, it turns out, is working in social services. It’s a topic Dean knows a bit about being that he grew up in foster care. He questions if some of the screening for foster parents has improved over the years. Some of the homes he stayed in were just to the left of hell itself. She mentions that she’s having car trouble and he tells her to bring it by the salvage yard. Dean doesn’t think another thing of it. Why would he? He has Cas.   
He introduces them when she drops off the car. Cas hears her name, takes one look at her, and shatters the coffee cup he is holding with his bare hand. For a second Dean thinks someone is shooting at them.   
Lucifer growls to Dean “Get her out of here.” As he bodily drags Cas off. Dean turns to Anna totally lost. But he can tell by the pleasantly fake look on her face that he has just totally fucked up.  
The ride home is painful. Cas stalks in the front door, heads to the bedroom, and slams the door shut. Dean is left standing in the living room staring at Lucifer.   
“What were you thinking?”  
“I don’t get it. What is the big deal? We had lunch. She needed her car looked at. It was one stupid weekend, a lifetime ago.”   
“Dean, angels don’t have casual sex.”  
“Anna apparently does. She had it with me and I woke up in a fucking ditch.”  
“Damn it! We are not talking about her, you idiot. We are talking about how your stupid ass basically cheated on your mate today!”   
Luc is yelling, it gives Dean some perspective for how much over his head he is at this point. Luc doesn’t yell.   
“I did not. I had lunch with her in public and offered to have someone fix her car. I would never, ever, do anything to hurt Cas.” His voice is dark his hands clenched. In desperation Dean tries to reach out to his husband’s soul. It crushes him more than he has words for when he feels Cas retreat from him across their bond.   
Maybe it was something he shouldn’t have tried. Cas is back out of the bedroom in a flash. He throws a bag at Dean feet and tells him  
“Get out. You can’t stay here, and give me back my key.”  
His voice sounds flat and dead. Dean wants to scream and pull his own skin off. They stare at each other. Luc disappears somewhere else in the house.   
“Cas…”  
“GET OUT! Get out or I will put you out.”   
Dean sobs before he can stop himself but manages to choke back the tears. He picks up the bag and turns to go. “I’m going to stay at Bobby’s. I’m sorry. I don’t understand, but I am sorry. I love you and hell no; I am not giving you back that key.”  
Bobby doesn’t ask him any questions. He doesn’t comment about how loudly Dean sobs that night either. Cas doesn’t come to work the next day.  
Or the day after that.  
Or the day after that.   
Luc explains to him in explicit detail several facts.  
1\. You don’t have lunches with people you slept with. Even if it is one time and like six years ago. You don’t have to care. Cas cares.  
2\. Anna should never have approached him anyway as he is clearly mated. Yes, she could tell, everyone can tell.  
3\. Angels don’t really think rationally when it comes to their mates. Cas is hurt, but he has spent enough time around humans to understand that Dean is a clueless, fuck up of an idiot, that doesn’t mean any harm about anything.   
4\. It doesn’t matter that what Dean did was not a big deal by human standards; his husband is not human.  
5\. He suggests Dean grovel in a way that he has never done before.   
6\. Just in case he missed it the first three times; Dean is an ignorant, insensitive, asshole who doesn’t deserve Cas and better never do this again if he wants to live.   
Got it.  
He spends a moment thinking that this is ridiculous. He didn’t do anything wrong as far as humans go. He wants to be angry, something, to not feel so hurt. One phone call to Sam takes the wind right out of his sails.   
“Dean, you can be indignant and alone, or you can acknowledge that Cas is from a different culture and apologize. If you pick door number two you might get to sleep in bed with your husband tonight.”  
His little brother, the genius.   
He gives Luc a ride home that night. When they get to the house Dean turns to him and says “Go inside and pack a bag. I left you directions in the back seat. Sam knows you’re coming. Don’t come home until Monday and have a good time with my brother.”  
For a moment there is a stunned silence to his right.  
“You want me to take the impala?”  
“It doesn’t matter. Nothing matters but Cas.”  
Though…  
“If you fuck her up. I will kill you.”  
Lucifer is back out of the house and driving down the road in five minutes.   
Dean finds Cas sitting on the sofa. When he looks up he sees exhaustion and regret.   
“So I guess I wasn’t the only one who got a talking to by Luc, huh?”  
“His advice was unwanted but not incorrect.” Cas doesn’t get up so Dean slides himself slowly down onto the other side of the couch.  
“Dean, I’m sorry.”  
Do what?  
“Do what?”  
“I over reacted, I know your cultural rules about sex and previous relationships is significantly more flexible than mine. I reacted poorly, embarrassed myself, alienated you, and angered your brother. Please forgive me. If I was angry at anyone it should have been Anna. She clearly knew what she was doing would cause issue.”  
“I’m sorry too baby. We need to talk about what is and is not ok. I don’t want to have this happen again.”  
Dean reaches out with his soul and Cas’s response is overwhelming. Dean feels everything Cas has pour into him and wrap around him and when he comes back to his senses he finds himself with an armful of angel with tears running down his cheeks.   
They spend the night working out the details; wrapped up in each others arms. Dean is to run screaming from all his exes. Not that there are that many really. No really, I swear. Cas agrees to stop rubbing Sam’s back. Even though he doesn’t mean anything by it, it makes Dean uncomfortable. He’ll get Luc to do it instead.   
“Cas, why would she want to mess with us in the first place? If Anna could see our bond, why get in the middle of it?”  
“I don’t know. I’m sure it doesn’t matter though, Anna won’t bother us again.”  
That’s weird.  
“Why not?”  
“Let’s just say we weren’t the only people Lucifer had a talk with.”  
Well okay then. Dean thinks. I wonder if the police will find a body.   
When Dean wakes up three weeks later there is a trunk in the middle of their bedroom. He looks at the latch on it and knows what the key is for. Cas is nowhere to be found. He opens it. Inside are papers and photos, little mementos, notes, letters, and feathers. He sorts it out chronologically and comes to realize that what he is looking at is Cas’s life. Everything that was ever important to Cas is in this box.   
Dean spends the day pouring through family albums, cards, and hand written letters from his parents. He finds Gabriel’s diary and can’t help but regret the loss of someone who loved Cas so clearly and so well. He wishes he had the chance to meet him. Dean tears up when he finds the t-shirt he used to wrap Cas’s wing the day of the accident. He had always wondered what had happened to that shirt. There are pictures of him and Sammy, Bobby, Luc. Some Dean didn’t even remember them being taken. Sketches of their house, of them.   
He smiles when Cas joins him in the middle of their bedroom floor.   
“You gave me your life for Christmas. That was what the key was to.”  
Cas smiles and whispers before he kisses him   
“That’s not true. You gave me back my life a long time ago.”


	9. Chapter 9

Part 9

Anna is….young. Irritatingly so. That much is clear prior to their conversation. The office secretary stumbles all over herself when he asks if Anna is available to meet with him. Lucifer is well aware of the impression he makes. His wild grey wings and narrow eyes. Even Angels are intimidated by him on first glance. Lucifer knows his grace is tarnished; it’s off putting to his own kind. Cas being the noticeable exception to this rule. He is clearly there for a purpose, not a social call. Yet when Anna comes to remove him from the lobby of the social services building she is all smiles and warm feelings.   
Far from being comforted; it makes him want to choke her for her ignorance.   
“I question your intentions related to my family.”  
It’s not a question. It’s a demand for information. Anna blinks.  
“I didn’t mean to cause any difficulties. Dean and I have been acquainted previously and when I saw him again I thought it would be nice to catch up.”  
“Little girl, explain to me the nature of your acquaintance with Dean Winchester by describing in detail the stitching on the impala’s back seat.”   
She flinches then; her grace recoils.   
“I didn’t know Dean had told anyone about that.”  
He doesn’t respond. He doesn’t have to. The look on his face says it all.  
“There is a child. We had heard there was a mated human and angel pair. We wanted to see if the rumor was true. When the information came back that it involved Dean, my grace exposed to my superiors that I knew him in some way. I couldn’t tell them how. It would have ruined my career. They decided I should approach him. I didn’t think an angel’s grace could cement with a human’s soul. I underestimated the connection I saw in Dean’s soul. I also didn’t expect that his mate would be male.”   
“So you created a shit storm to cover your own ass.”  
She opens her mouth, and then she shuts it. Lucifer sighs. There is at least a sense of relief that she had not come to purposely hurt his newly found brothers.   
“What does this have to do with a child?”  
“We have a boy in social services custody. I can’t say much in order to protect his confidentiality, but he is a halfling. His parents are long dead and he has spent much of his life raised by human foster families.”  
This is interesting.   
“And this halfling has what to do with my family?”  
“He is fading in his current home. We believe he requires the care of angels to help him strengthen his grace. He wants to learn more about the other side of his culture.”  
“So place him with a mated pair and be done with it.”  
“We haven’t been successful in locating an appropriate placement that meets his needs.”  
Bullshit.   
“Nobody wants him do they? So you were hoping to find a human/angel pair to place him with. That was what this was all about? You were scoping them out to see if the bond was true so you could try to get them to adopt a kid?”  
“Correct.”  
“If your agency wants to have a chance in all of Hell to see that happen you better tell them to send someone else to negotiate. If you come near my family again, I will rip your wings right off your back.”  
Lucifer waits until he is halfway home before he starts laughing.   
This is going to hysterical.   
The night Dean tells him to get out Luc is conflicted. He wants to be present in case he is needed while Dean and his mate resubmit to their bond. The last few days have been taxing, between alternately caring for and yelling at a distraught, and clearly overreacting Castiel. He hesitates in the driver’s seat before he pulls off. But the call of his potential is too strong and Luc’s grace, battered though it is, is already stretching out to Sam across the distance. He rolls the windows down when he hits the highway and stretches out his wings as well as he can. Luc turns the radio up; bless Dean for having some kind of taste when it comes to music. Once he is settled he presses the gas pedal to the floor with his foot and blasts into the night.   
Sam doesn’t comment on how fast he drove to get there. Luc doesn’t mention that Sam was waiting by the window when he pulled up an hour and fifteen minutes faster than it was supposed to take him.   
They stare at each other across the living room of Sam’s tiny apartment. Luc gathers his grace close to himself and it coils and screams to reach Sam. He wants so badly to allow that connection. To fall into the need to imprint on this strong, kind soul he sees across from him. But he and Sam need to talk. Luc has things he needs to tell Sam before they can go any further. He’s hoping that there will still be an opportunity to continue this bonding when he is done. But if not then better to end it before it is truly started.   
The loss of potential so close to the final mating would not be something Lucifer thinks he can survive again.   
Sam disrupts his thoughts with kisses.   
I’m sorry, where was I?   
They get a text after a very late dinner that is just a picture of four feet tangled up together and a smiley face in the text box.   
“I suppose we should be grateful they just took a picture of their naked feet and not the naked rest of them.”  
Sam chuckles from his place against Luc’s chest.  
“Seriously dude. When it comes to Dean and Cas we should totally count our blessings.”  
Luc certainly hopes that’s true and he drifts off to sleep in Sam’s bed running his fingers through Sam’s hair over and over.   
He wakes up to the sound of a can opening. When he looks up there is an odd looking man sitting on a stool next to the bed with a beer in his hand.   
“SAMMY, the grey falcon rises.”   
And then he’s gone. What the crap?  
Sam’s smile when he gets out of the bathroom is shining. “I see you met Ash, my weird ass roommate.”  
“Indeed.”  
Sam’s soul is warm, gentle, comfortable. It produces a feeling of safety and familiarity that coupled with his size and physical presence is quite intense. It’s not something Luc is used to having. They spend most of the day traveling around town. Luc gets to see the parts of Sam’s life away from home. It’s something he takes pleasure in. Sam is comfortable here, he shines. It’s a new perspective for someone who has only known him when he is with Dean. The absence of Sam’s brother impacts his spirit immensely. Sam is at the same time more confident and more exposed. Luc feels an intense need to shelter the raw sides of his soul.   
They settle on Sam’s bed that night; staring at the ceiling, Luc tracing the contours of Sam’s fingertips, up the side of his forearm. Sam plucking lazily at the feathers on his wings. If it wasn’t for the conversation Luc knows he has put off long enough he would be blissful. As it is, the thought of talking about this with Sam makes him want to vomit. His grace tosses and rolls with distress.   
“Whatever it is; you might as well just tell me.”  
Luc chokes on his own laughter in response. He forgets sometimes that though they were not raised together, Sam is very much Dean’s sibling. They can both be very blunt and they don’t miss much.  
“What do you want to know?”   
“Dude, whatever it is that you want to tell me. You have been driving me nuts all day. That and if it’s not part of the story; I want to know what happened to your wing.”  
Luc didn’t think Sam had noticed. Not with the generally decrepit condition his wings were always in. Cas and Dean helped with grooming when he could no longer stand it. But it was not something he accepted often. Their familial relationship is still so new in so many ways.   
“My left wing was badly broken and did not heal properly.”  
He should have known it wasn’t going to be that simple.  
“I thought angels had healers for that.”  
“We do. They refused to help me.”  
“Why would they refuse to help you? What happened?”   
Luc can feel the tenseness about Sam’s soul. There is a current of anger sparking across it.  
“A very long time ago, I loved someone. We were imprinted and had begun the bonding process. There was an accident. Just a stupid accident and he died. We had not finalized the mating or I would not be here today. But it was so close. I felt his life snuff out and I waited for the end but it never came. They said I was unresponsive for a week. Even after that I had lost the will to go on. One night I left the home of my family and I flew as high as I could stand it. Then I……fell.”  
There is a stillness he did not expect in Sam. The hand in his feathers clenches slowly the releases.   
“You stopped flying.”  
“I wanted so badly to die. I was lucky, looking back on it. The crash didn’t do more damage than it did. But it mutilated my wing.”  
“Why wouldn’t they help you? How could they leave you like that?”  
“Suicide is a sin, Sam. One of the worst things you can do in my culture. They thought me to be tainted and were afraid of touching their grace to mine. I healed on my own over time.”  
“Is that why you’re alone now?”  
“Yes, my family would not accept me back. When I was well enough to walk I left the hospital and never returned.”   
“Cas knows doesn’t he? That’s why he took you in so fast.”  
“Cas can see the taint on my grace. The mark of my failed attempt. But he has never judged me. I think perhaps he has been to a place where he wished for death. Your brother’s mate is very kind.”  
They don’t speak any more that night. Sam’s soul rolling as he tries to process this new information. Lucifer falls asleep to gentle kisses placed on his damaged wing.   
The next day over breakfast Sam is engaged with his weekly phone call to Dean. Explaining to Dean in explicit detail all the bodywork the impala is going to need after Luc’s weekend getaway. Luc has to shove his wings over his head and bite into his own hand to stifle the laughter. He can hear Dean shrieking and Cas chuckling in the background. In retaliation Dean sends them both a text message containing full frontal nudity. Both he and Sam consider that they may be partially blinded for the rest of their lives.   
He kisses Sam goodbye and Sam hands him an envelope.  
“Read this when you get home. I’ll see you in a few weeks.”  
The drive back is tedious. The envelope sits like a stone in his lap.  
Dean and Cas are cleaning when he gets home. Or rather, Cas is cleaning and Dean is trying to distract him with sex. It’s a game they play often. Dean usually wins but it doesn’t seem like Cas minds. Both Cas’s grace and Dean’s soul shine when they see him. It’s good to be welcomed home, a feeling he never thought he would have again. Dean makes him lunch, or rather tries to, Luc has learned quickly the only being in this house that can cook is him. He eats the sandwich quickly and excuses himself to his room.  
The letter is long and achingly sweet. Not at all what he had expected. Sam must have written his thoughts down after he had fallen sleep last night. There are questions, many questions. Luc had expected that; but no rejection, no request to stop. Sam makes his intentions to come home, and his expectation that Luc be there waiting, clear at the end of his note. He can’t wipe the dopy look off his face for three days. Dean throws sausages at him over dinner and rolls his eyes.   
On the scale of dickheadedness there is a special place reserved for Zachariah. Lucifer regrets ever telling Anna to stay away. Her superior is so much worse to deal with. He is disgusted by Dean and Cas’s union. He is appalled by Lucifer’s grace. Halfway through the explanation of why he is even there it’s clear that though they are presenting the case of this child, he is hoping that Dean and Cas will refuse. Luc can’t help but grin broadly when the ignorant, old, asshole says something out of the way to Castiel and Dean Winchester, human being, bodily put him out on his behind.   
A week goes by. Luc waits for what they all know is coming. Dean grew up bounced from foster home to foster home; never settled, sometimes abused and neglected. He is not going to forget that there is a child out there that needs a home. When Dean slides the card off of the refrigerator and goes to call Zachariah back Luc turns to Cas who raises his wings in a shrug as if to say what are you going to do?   
He and Cas discuss it over lunch at the coffee shop later. Cas and Dean had never discussed the concept of children. After all, there was no way it was going to happen naturally. But knowing there is a Halfling out there. They both felt like they needed all the information.   
All the information my ass.   
The glowing hope in his new brother’s grace tells Luc all he needs to know.   
They end up bundled together in Bobby’s garage over Sam’s break from school. It’s the angel way of doing things. Decisions that impact the whole family involve the whole family. Bobby grumbles but doesn’t refuse. Something about “not being the grandpa here.”  
Zachariah comes with information and backup. Luc doesn’t comment. He looks over at the other members of his family piled in the garage and thinks that if he were faced with Dean, Cas, Sam, himself, Bobby, Chuck, Ellen, Jo, and Becky he would have brought help too.   
The boys name is Jesse. He’s nine years old. His parents are dead. There are no relatives on either side willing to accept him; he’s bounced from one foster family to another for most of his life. The most recent placement coming after a trip to a group home. He is sullen, angry, and despondent. They have pictures and Luc can tell it takes everything Cas has not to fly to wherever he is right now and bring him home.   
When the presentation is over Zachariah and his minions leave one parting comment that makes things endlessly more complicated. Jesse is unwilling to come alone. He is a package deal. The only constant he has found in his life is the presence of an older human boy named Adam; and Adam’s list of negative behaviors makes Dean’s juvenile record look like a birthday card. It’s both of them or nothing. Zachariah leaves smug. Luc bursts out laughing as soon as they get in the car. He turns to his family, all of them grinning. Bobby stands and looks around before saying  
“Looks like you bunch of idjits are going to need a bigger house.”  
Luc finds Dean and Cas pouring over home magazines later that evening. Doing the math and frowning. They sigh and sit back, worry creasing Cas’s forehead.   
“There is no way we can afford this.”   
Dean looks away but Luc can see the grief in his soul. It’s Sam who speaks up from the doorway.   
“I’m going to move home.”   
That is unexpected.  
The response, in unison, from all of them   
“What about school?”  
“I’m done. When the semester ends all I have left is my thesis. I can work on it here and work at Bobby’s. That will bring in some extra money. I want to help and, I want to be here, with you.” He is speaking to all of them but his eyes never leave Luc’s face.   
Dean has his mouth hanging open.   
“Dude, Sammy, your parents are going to be so pissed.”  
“My parents haven’t talked to me since I didn’t come home for Christmas.”   
Luc is going to have to try to work on that later. Sam is hurt; his soul shivers when he says it. Family is not something so easily thrown away.   
They do some recalculations and are a bit better off by the end. But it’s still achingly tight. Luc takes a deep breath; he isn’t sure how this information will be received.   
“You know the house behind us is abandoned, correct?”  
No shocker there; it has been as long as they lived here. The backyard is split between the two properties but they have always just taken care of and used the whole thing.   
“It’s a three bedroom. We could make use of that after we clean it up.”  
“Good idea.” Dean is suspicious. “But we can’t afford to buy a house and fix it up. Then what happens to you and Sam?”  
“You won’t have to buy it. I already own it. I bought it when Sam was coming home from school. But after we met; I just never moved out.”   
Luc has enough sense to be embarrassed by the admission. He had fallen in love with this family and had not wanted to leave even just across the yard.   
“You, Cas, and the children can live there and Sam and I can stay here.”  
There is a question in the statement. He shifts his eyes to Sam.   
“Sounds like a plan to me.” Sam’s smile is warm; Luc feels himself relaxing.   
Dean and Cas are struck dumb, it seems, by the information.  
Sam sits on the floor in the circle of his arms and leans back to whisper in his ear.  
“Babe, how did you afford to buy that house? You have been paying rent here for months.”  
In between hesitant kisses to Sam’s ear he whispers  
“I told you I left my family behind. I didn’t tell you I left my money.”  
Sam snorts and Cas laughs out loud; angel hearing, being what it is, he knows Cas heard him. Dean is left on the sofa totally lost  
“What? What did I miss? Damn you guys!”


	10. Chapter 10

Part 10

“Shoot me now.”  
Dean is whispering to him during class again. It is distracting and irritating. Cas keeps his eyes focused on the presenter and casually picks up his foot bringing it down with force on top of Dean’s.   
Dean knows better than to yell.   
It’s not that Cas doesn’t agree.  
Father, these classes are tedious.   
But they are required for foster parenting, and if they are required Cas is determined to be a good student.   
Not that there is anyone in class to impress. Their family was so large that they were kind enough to allow them to have a private instructor. So Sam, Dean, Cas, Luc, Bobby, Ellen, Jo, and Chuck have been sitting every Thursday night for nine weeks in class together learning about parenting kids. Ellen and Bobby both agree that they could have skipped it; after all they say their kids turned out fine. Ellen has a leg to stand on as Jo is delightful. Bobby can only take credit for Dean and Chuck. Cas is overly fond of Dean so he is willing to give him the benefit of the doubt there. Chuck on the other hand is a neurotic basket case with no motivation and even less goals.   
Cas is smart enough to just thank Bobby for being willing to come.   
Ruby, the instructor, is an angel with as much personality as a bagel. No cream cheese either. The more time Cas spends with humans the more he thinks of his own kind as bland, bland, bland. He hears the sigh off to the right and when he turns Lucifer is staring at him with one eyebrow raised. Cas can almost hear him thinking  
“Shoot me now.”  
Cas wonders if Dean and his newly found brother notice how much alike they are at times. He makes a note to himself to never bring this up.   
Even Sam, who so loves education, is listing slightly in his chair.   
It must be break time soon.   
The last several months have been a flurry of activity for the family. They have cleaned up the house that backs up to them. Dean and Cas have moved there as they continue the renovations. The house was a mess and it took some major restructuring to get it up to code. He can still feel the uncomfortable grit of sawdust in his wings. But neither him nor Lucifer were willing to have trash bags taped over them to keep it out.   
You have to have some pride.   
Sam finished out the semester and after a brief trip to his parents, Lucifer in tow, to get his belongings he moved into the house with Luc and has been alternating his time between the garage, his thesis, and construction projects. He is tireless and Cas will forever be grateful for that.   
Lucifer has fully imprinted on Sam. There is a joy in his grace that takes Cas’s breath away. Luc is very subdued angel. To see his emotions so clearly through his grace speaks volumes of not only his attachment to Sam but to the family as a whole. Cas has a brother again. It’s wonderful. Now if they could just get to the point where Sam fully grooms Luc’s wings. Their physical intimacy is slow moving. Lucifer has so much shame regarding his damaged wing and though Lucifer is unaware of the truth of it; Cas knows Sam has never been with a man before, much less an angel. He is very nervous.  
It’s an issue Dean likes to harass him about frequently.   
Dean can be such an ass.   
Ruby calls for a break and Dean slips out to bring Cas back a diet soda and chocolate. He’s rethinking the Dean is an ass comment. The whispered filthy promises of what Dean is going to do to him tonight at home, after class, is enough to make certain that he is back in Cas’s good graces.   
Dean is good to his word and Cas collapses sweaty and blissed out onto Deans chest. They curl together for a few moments before he knows he needs to slide off. Dean ruffling his feathers the wrong direction and making him shiver.   
“We go to meet the boys this weekend.”  
“Are you still worrying about that?”  
Dean can be exasperating but he is also sensitive. Cas knows that Dean is concerned neither boy will want to make this transition. Cas is more worried for Dean should there be a rejection now. He has his heart set on being able to be a father to these two lost souls that he has only ever seen in pictures. Surely the world is not so cruel as to give him the opportunity and then take it away.   
“Baby, what if they hate us?”  
“What if they don’t? Dean you are going to drive us both insane with this. Let’s just drive out there Saturday and see what happens.”  
How he makes it through Friday Cas will never know. Dean’s soul is a ball of tightly wound energy and worry. Bobby walks Dean over to Cas at the end of the day  
“Take this home with you and don’t bring it back until it’s normal again.”  
It’s going to be a very long drive.   
Sam and Luc join them for dinner that night. Mostly to give Cas something else to talk about than “What if they don’t like us.”  
Luc gives a rather drawn out explanation of the ethics of species intermingling. He’s mostly just talking to try and relieve the tension. Dean’s not in the mood for a debate and blurts out   
“So, how’s the mating going?”  
Lucifer throws mashed potatoes into his hair and Sam chokes on his pork chop.   
“You really are unbearable, you know that?”  
“Cas tells me that daily, but he doesn’t leave.”  
“You’re lucky to have us you know that.”  
That’s a bit bluntly honest coming from Lucifer. He and Dean have an agreement where much of the time they act as though they merely tolerate each other for the sake of their partners. But everyone knows this isn’t true. He and Dean are as tightly bonded as siblings get and care for each other a great deal. Lucifer is just as nervous as Dean about the children and his hesitance to allow Sam to oil his wings is a bit of a sore spot.   
Dean smiles from across the table.  
“Yeah man, I know. I’m one of the luckiest guys in the world.”  
Aren’t we all.   
Their first meeting with their children felt like all four of them were getting ready to be led off the guillotine. Cas is slightly nauseous by the time they get there. Jesse jerks to a standing position the minute they open the door. Adam doesn’t budge, nor does he look away from the window he is staring out of. But Cas can see the coiling of his soul both away from Dean and himself and toward Jesse. Jesse’s grace tracking back to his for comfort. Zachariah was not wrong. These two are bonded. They must be placed together.   
Jesse is intrigued by Cas. His smaller black wings curling up and then down to match Cas’s as they move. Cas cautiously extends his grace as an invitation and is pleasantly surprised that Jesse reaches back. When their graces touch Cas can feel his anxiety and allows Jesse to feel some of his own; he also includes his excitement and affection. Jesse reaches past that and his grace prods at the bond Dean and Cas share. Cas allows the examination. Clearly this is important for Jesse. When he feels the child begin to pull his grace away Cas tentatively touches the bond that Jesse shares with Adam. An acknowledgement of the importance this bond must have for him. Jesse’s eyes widen, his wings flutter, and Adam for the first time turns fully to the room. He has a huge black eye.  
“What’s the other guy look like?”  
Dean’s gruff voice behind Cas is startling since no one has spoken up to this point.  
“He got a luck shot off.”  
Dean smiles.   
“I had a few people land one on me before. I’ll show you how to block it if you want.”  
“Dude, aren’t you supposed to like tell me fighting is wrong or something?”  
“Okay. Fighting is wrong. Now you want me to show you how to block it or not?”  
“Totally.”  
Dean and Adam wander off outside. Dean’s soul is shining with confidence. Adam’s wary but hopeful.   
The minute they are gone Jesse starts talking. He doesn’t stop for twenty minutes. Cas gets an overview that Jesse has grown up in foster care and that all he knows about his family is in a trunk in his room. He met Adam years ago and in their lives of being bounced from place to place he has become the only thing Jesse feels he can count on. Cas realizes halfway through the talk that Jesse is not concerned that they will not take him. Jesse is concerned they won’t want Adam. Cas tries not to laugh in the child’s face. Clearly Adam is right up Dean’s alley.   
He also comes to understand that Jesse knows little about angel culture, or lifestyle.   
“Do you want to go flying with me?”  
It’s a simple request. Something Cas thought he would enjoy as clearly Jesse has not had a significant amount of angelic interaction.   
“I can’t.”  
“Why not? Do they not allow it?”  
“No, I just don’t know how.”  
Cas feels his face go white. His grace stretches to surround Jesse’s without thought.   
“You don’t know how?”  
“No, they never taught me.”  
“That’s it.”  
Cas is standing and rolling out of the room before Jesse knows what is going on. He follows the larger angel down the hallway and outside where Cas yells at Dean  
“Get ready. We’re leaving.”  
Cas feels the excruciating response from Jesse and the angry blast from Adam.   
He stops.  
“I mean everyone. Both of you, get your stuff, we are leaving now.”  
Maybe I over-reacted.  
“Baby, did you have to cuss that lady out? It’s not her fault. She’s human and the kid didn’t come with a manual or anything.”  
“I was merely trying to express the importance of flying for an angelic child.”  
“Dude! You threatened to staple her hand to the desk. You went Uncle Buck on her.”  
It doesn’t matter. His reaction and Lucifer’s subsequent phone call to Zachariah which included copious amounts of cussing and name calling ensured that even though Jesse and Adam weren’t on the way home with them right then; they would be there in two weeks.   
Just enough time for the papers to process.  
The boys had heard most of the ensuing chaos after Cas’s outburst. Jesse had actually hugged Cas and Dean when they went to leave. Adam had given them both a handshake and what seemed to be an actual smile.   
We’re going to be a family.  
Cas tries to remember that feeling of excitement when Jesse lights the couch on fire and Adam steals the car a month later.   
Dean handles things remarkably well. He simply puts the fire out and cautions Jesse about rockets being outdoor toys unless you are at Sam’s house. He tells Adam if he wants to go to the movies he can ask for a ride; as long as his chores are done and his grades are okay they will be happy to take him. They boys look shocked. Cas is sure he does too.  
He hears Dean telling the story to Bobby the next day at work. When he gets done laughing at Dean Bobby reminds him of when he stole the tow-truck and drove it Vegas when he was 17. Dean stumbles over a very humble apology and then makes Bobby swear to never tell the boys.  
Cas thinks Bobby had his finger crossed.   
The mechanics of flying are difficult and supposedly instinctual. Jesse doesn’t have the instinct it seems. They try numerous methods for encouragement. Nothing works. Lucifer calls everyone he can think of and some of his connections tell him that it is just too late for the child to learn. Jesse could be grounded with useless wings for the rest of his life. Cas breaks down in tears. He remembers not being able to fly and the possibility that the gift was lost to him forever. He can’t imagine his child being unable to soar when he has two healthy wings.   
Lucifer reacts badly to his outburst. His grace darkens with concern. Cas watches as he approaches Jesse.  
“Do you want to fly?”  
“God, yes.”  
“Come with me.”  
They go the roof and Cas follows. He has no idea what Luc could try that he has not already attempted. They walk to edge.  
“Look over there.” Lucifer angles his hand to a point out and up on the horizon.   
Then he pushes Jesse off the roof.  
Cas screams in a way that he will swear later is manly.   
Turns out the kid can fly.


	11. Chapter 11

Part 11

The people in this house are nuts.  
More appropriately the people in both houses and the Salvage Yard are nuts. But this crazy make up of angels and humans seems to work for them. Adam is not used to having a home; a sense of security. Hell, he’s been living with Dean and Cas for two months now and he just unpacked the duffel he has been hiding under the bed. He’s still holding onto the food he stole from the pantry though, just in case Jesse needs it.   
That’s his only friend in the whole world. He’s not going to let the kid go hungry.   
Adam’s just starting to think the smiles on the faces of these weird ass family members are real and not just built up because they want something from him. Well they do want something from him; they want decent grades and respect for curfew, they want dishes done when it’s his turn, and appropriate language. They want him to not fight, unless it’s a last resort. They want honesty. That’s the really hard one.   
Dean even got him what he calls an internship at the salvage yard. Right now it’s just running errands and refilling the coffee pot but he knows all the parts of an engine. Cas is really patient with him. Luc is learning too so they get to work together. But he suspects Luc just joined in so that he had some competition.   
He’s starting to forgive that guy for throwing Jesse off the roof.   
Scared the hell out of the kid; but he loves flying. Jesse’s young, he should be able to be happy any way that he can. Being here makes him happy. Being here makes Jesse feel safe and loved. That’s important for Adam. He needs to make sure he doesn’t mess this up for the kid.   
Please God, just don’t let me fuck this up.   
“Dude, your foster parents are faggots.”  
“Dude, my foster parent’s aren’t even the same species. If you’re going to be a dick at least get what you bitching about right. What’s the bigger issue here?”  
It usually shuts them up. Adam can take it. Kids have been ragging him about Jesse since the day he pulled him out of the tree they had strung him up in. Adam’s used to being different. He could care less if they like him so long as they leave him and Jesse alone.  
“Do you think they are going to keep us?”  
Jesse is flopped on his bed next to him like he starts out every night. Dean and Cas have never commented on the fact that he doesn’t move to his own room until like 3 in the morning.   
“I don’t know. They say they want to. Is that cool with you?”  
“Yeah. I like it here. I hope we can stay.”   
Jesse’s wings are always his tell. They flutter and spread out when he is comfortable or thinking about something nice. Adam has laughed at him a few times since they moved here watching him unconsciously mimic the wing actions of Cas and Luc. He rolls his back to Jesse; squeezing him between Adam and the wall; away from the door. Adam is well aware that by now Jesse is a little stronger than he is. It’s been a long time since he won a wrestling match. Old habits die hard.   
Cas and Dean are pretty awesome. They really love each other. Jesse says it’s because they’re mated but Adam can’t see all that angel crap. They really like each other though and that is especially awesome. If anybody had ever told him he would be having the best year of his life so far living with pair of married gay dudes and their gayish brother and his angel boyfriend across the yard he would have hit someone. But it’s pretty awesome. Though Adam is still not sure what the crap is going on with Luc and Sam. Jesse says they’re together but not married yet.   
They look at each other like they’re having a long distance relationship.   
Adam knows they share the same room. Hell, the house is only a two bedroom house and the other room is Sam’s office. But they don’t touch like Dean and Cas, those two guys can’t keep there hands off each other half the time. Adam’s never seen a couple be so close. They aren’t just together all the time; they want to be together all the time.   
Jesse loves it. They roll him around on the ground tickling him, nudge him with their elbows, put him in a head lock, and ruffle his hair. They start grooming his wings after the first month goes by. Adam tries not to feel jealous or left out. It’s not like they don’t try to include him. Cas threw his arm around him about three weeks ago and tried to tug him into the family huddle on the floor. He jerked back, he just couldn’t help it. Adam can’t be that close to them; too much bad stuff has happened with people touching him before. He just can’t bring himself to allow it. But he wants to. He wants to so badly.   
Cas doesn’t try again and even though Adam is pretty sure he is not offended by his rejection; he’s not sure how to even begin to make this better.   
“You can trust them you know? I could tell if you couldn’t”  
He knows Jesse is right. Jesse can see people a lot clearer than Adam can. It’s been really useful in their placements together. If they ever got around someone that freaked Jesse out; Adam just acted out until they were removed. It was risky but it kept all the focus on him and off the kid. He’d taken a few beatings but he had worse before.   
“I know man. But it’s not the same for me as it is for you.”  
“Why?”  
“Jesse, they only took me because they wanted you and we’re a package deal. They don’t really want me. I’m excess baggage.”  
“That’s not true, Adam.”  
He should have known that wouldn’t be the end of it. Jesse starts a campaign to prove Adam’s worth and importance to the family. Adam gets the front seat in the car, Adam get seconds first at meals, Adam gets to the pick the movie, if one of the grown ups is going ANYWHERE Adam gets to go with them. He swears the kid would rip the wings off his own back if it would let Adam go flying with Luc and Cas instead of him.   
It’s driving him crazy.   
“Stop it, Jesse.”  
“Why? You like it, I know you do. It makes you feel good. You stop it. Just let them be nice to you. Why do you have to make it so hard? I just want us to be happy.”  
“I’m not making this hard. It’s just how it is!”  
“No it’s not. It’s just how you are. They’re not the problem Adam. You’re the problem.”  
Ouch.   
It hurts. Jesse cut him close to home. Adam’s never been good with being happy. When you like something or when something is important to you then people can hurt you by taking it away. It’s not safe to like people either. They leave, they abandon you. So Adam does what he knows to do. He’s just trying to prove a point to the kid. It’s better this way anyway. If he ruins it then he doesn’t have to wait around for them to decide they don’t want him. He can just rush the process along.   
Adam does what he knows to do. He fucks it all up.   
He starts fights, skips school, dodges the Salvage yard. He’s rude and standoffish. He stops doing his chores. Nothing seems to have the desired effect. They still offer for him to join them. They still treat him like he is wanted and not a problem.   
It just makes him mad.   
I can’t take this.   
He pushes Jesse away. That’s the hardest part. He loves that kid like he really was his brother but he can’t risk them thinking that Jesse is part of the problem. Jesse can have a life here, with this family, even after Adam is gone.   
They never wanted me anyway.   
It comes to a head when he gets caught shoplifting an Ipod from one of the shops downtown. But the guy doesn’t call the cops like he was expecting. He calls Bobby; who sends Dean.   
The ride back to the Salvage Yard is quiet. Dean isn’t acting like Adam thinks he should. There’s no yelling, no shoving, no finger pointing. Confused and frankly frightened he follows Dean into the garage. It’s suspiciously empty for three o’clock on a Wednesday. Adam knows they have cars to work on. But there is nobody around.   
“You know, the serpentine belt connects the alternator, power steering pump, water pump, A/C compressor, and the air pump in an engine.”  
Dean is leaned over with his arms resting on the front of a truck. The hood’s up. Adam wanders over to look inside with him.  
“Yeah, so?”  
“So those parts are connected; they work off a central item. If the belt is not there then they can’t run.”  
“This isn’t about a car, man.”  
“No, it’s not. But that belt is like our family. It’s what keeps us all running together. We may do different things but we’re all part of the same unit. The same engine. When one part isn’t working right then nothing works right.”  
“So you’re saying I broke your belt?”  
“No Adam. I’m saying you are a part of this family. But you’re broken. And you being broken is fucking this up. So I just need to know; do you want to be broken? Or do you want to try and run with the rest of us?”  
Adam feels it coming. He’s so angry, has been so angry for a long ass time. His hands clench on the truck but Dean doesn’t move.  
“I don’t know how to do this.”  
“Kid, neither do we but we’re willing to give it a shot.”  
“You’re not supposed to be like this. Why don’t you just do it? What the hell is going on?”  
Dean looks shocked.  
“Do what, Adam?”  
“Yell at me, hit me, hurt me. SOMETHING!”  
He’s pushing at Dean, shoving at him and backing him up across the garage. Somewhere in his head Adam knows this is only happening because Dean’s allowing it. He wouldn’t be able to move him if he didn’t want to be moved.   
“I’m not going to hurt you kid.”  
“Yes you are. Everyone does. You don’t want me, you just wanted Jesse. You’re going to find out, you’re going to find out how fucked up I am and then you’re not going to want me anymore.”  
“Adam that is not how this is going to go.”  
He doesn’t think before he swings and Adam watches with a sick fascination as his fist hits Dean square in the mouth. He could have blocked it. Blood trickles out from the cut on Dean’s lip. It’s like time stops. Adam can hear wheezing, almost gasping, in the background, and this keening noise that he has heard on the Discovery Channel that small animal make when they are hurt. He doesn’t put two and two together enough to realize that he’s make the noise. That it’s him that’s in distress.   
Dean just stands there and it occurs to Adam oddly that Dean is getting taller. But he’s not, Adam finds himself curling up on the floor of the garage.   
“Please, please, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. I’m so sorry. I’ll do anything. Please. Just don’t send Jesse away. He needs to stay here. I’ll go. You can send me back to the group home. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.”  
He feels the tears burning his eyes and has gripped the sides of his legs so hard his fingers are turning white. But he doesn’t fight back or jerk away when Dean sits down on the ground beside him and drags him into his arms. Adam sobs out what feels like a lifetime of grief and fear into Dean’s shirt. When he calms down enough for the world to make a little bit of sense again, he’s wrung out. But he doesn’t want to move. Moving means that Dean is going to tell him to go. Hell, he was yelling so bad they probably already called Zachariah on him.   
“Adam, look up.”  
Dean’s voice is shaky and when Adam looks his face is wet too. He spans the room and to his horror Cas, Sam, Luc, Bobby, Chuck, and Jo are standing there. He goes to run. Dean clamping down on him as soon as he starts moving.   
“Adam, this is your family. Look around. We’re all messed up, we’ve all made mistakes, Hell kid, most of us aren’t even blood related. It doesn’t matter. You’re part of this. A member of this family. Whatever you need to happen for you to believe it then we’ll get it done. You’re not going anywhere. Not without us.”  
A month later Adam stares into the bathroom mirror whispering so quietly to himself “Hi, I’m Adam Winchester. Adam Winchester, that’s me.” The courthouse is huge. Adam turns around during the ceremony that makes him and Jesse permanent Winchester’s and sees the whole family standing up with them. Maybe some people think it’s dumb to want to be adopted when you’re 16. He doesn’t care. Adam doesn’t care what anyone thinks of him unless they’re part of his family.   
Rolling down the steps of the courthouse, Dean (pop) is swinging Jesse around in a circle by his arms. The kid is squealing. Adam jumps onto Cas’s (dad’s) back.   
“Fly me home?”  
It’s not something he has ever asked before. Cas has been so careful with him. But this is his dad now. He won’t hurt him. Adam can trust this.   
The smile he gets back in response to his question is megawatt. He’s excited; he’s never flown before, even on an airplane.   
He grabs hold and his father shoots them up into the air.  
Yeah, Adam remembers now why he hates riding in the backseat.   
Motion sickness.   
He misses the wings when he pukes. Mostly.  
Later that night while Dean is helping Cas clean his wings he hears Cas mutter.  
“Parenthood is a gift.”  
Dean responds   
“A gift of gastrointestinal distress?”  
“Shut up Dean.”


	12. Chapter 12

Part 12

“I think it’s tar.”  
“Oh holy hell.”  
Sam hates to be the bearer of bad news here. But something sticky, gross, and black has managed to grip onto the back of Lucifer’s left wing. He’s trying to be diplomatic as he assesses the damage; ignoring how upon hearing the news Lucifer frantically flails out his leg to kick Cas repeatedly in the shins.   
“This is all your fault.”  
“My fault? How is this my fault? Dean was the one who convinced you to get up under the truck.”  
Sam has to admit that Cas is making a pretty good amount of sense there. Especially since he was picking up the boys from school when the incident happened.   
“You never should have mated with him in the first place.”  
Ok. That’s going too far.   
This is his brother they are talking about. Lucifer yelps as Sam tugs, probably a little too hard, on the mass of feathers and yuck.   
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. My apologies. This is just very unpleasant.”  
Cas’s face is priceless. It’s a mixture of righteous indignation and brotherly support. Sam can tell they are having another kind of conversation that he can’t see. But he knows his; ummm…partner, well enough to know that though he is acting angry Lucifer is really embarrassed. Anything that draws attention to his wings, especially the poor damaged left one is difficult for Luc.   
Cas can tell too. Every time someone walks by the doorway to the back office he spreads his wings out to obscure the man he has come to call his brother from view. As Sam tries to remove as much of the goop as he can he doesn’t miss Lucifer finally, tiredly, lean forward and rest his head against Cas’s shoulder. Cas’s hands coming up to ruffle the hair on the back of his head. Some of the tension seeps out of the Luc’s wings and Cas gives Sam an encouraging nod from over Luc’s shoulder.   
It takes four hours to remove the mess. By the time they are done they have doused Lucifer’s wing with every type of chemical they could think of to remove the crud without removing his feathers. The wing is tattered, the skin around the area swollen and red. Luc dented the metal desk he was sitting on by gripping it too hard and his eyes are wet. Cas having to restrain him at one point around hour three when he gave up and just demanded they rip all of the damaged feathers out. They’re all exhausted.   
Ellen had taken the kids home for Dean and Cas a little bit ago. By the text message report dinner had been served and the homework was done. They were playing Wii and Jesse was handing Adam his ass on guitar hero. Sam laughs at that. They won’t even let Lucifer play that game anymore. No one can beat him. He should have been a rock star.  
He and Dean are locking up for the night when he catches a bit of Cas’s conversation with Lucifer out by the car.   
“You need your wings cleaned and thoroughly oiled tonight.”  
“Your point? I’m certain you must have one.”  
There is a thud and a hiss of pain. Cas has a low threshold for bullshit on a good day and Sam can tell he is tired.   
“My point, you gigantic asshole, is that you need to let Sam help you.”  
“I can do it myself.”  
Sam’s heart clenches. He loves Lucifer. More than he thought he could love someone. He’s also pretty sure that the feeling is mutual. But the wings are an issue. Luc is very protective of his wings and though Sam can groom him and has several times, the full monty has never been accomplished. He won’t let Sam oil his wings. There has never been a direct answer as to why.  
“Enough. I’m tired of it. You’re being a childish idiot and it is starting to impact everyone. Let him take care of you. Get over yourself, give in, and claim your mate before someone else does.”  
It’s an empty threat. Sam’s not going anywhere but it spurs a response from Lucifer that Sam wasn’t expecting.  
“My wings are hideous. What if he’s disgusted? Cas, I don’t want to be alone anymore. I would rather not be bonded than risk his rejection.”  
Sam is stunned.   
I’m so stupid.  
All this waiting and it’s over THAT?  
“Dude, you’re going to have to deal with that, like, tonight.”  
Dean’s standing right behind him. Of course his brother heard it too. But Dean’s face is serious. Sometimes with all their abusive banter it’s easy to forget that Dean really cares about Luc.   
“Suggestions?”  
Dean’s slow grin is both reassuring and disturbing.  
“Well, there’s his way; which will take until you’re forty, or there’s our way.”  
Sam smiles back.  
Our way is pretty blunt.   
He maybe could have planned his attack better. But frankly he didn’t have a lot of time to think about it. It’s a short car ride home from the Salvage Yard and Sam’s brain is already moving past the need to convince Lucifer to let him do this to the actual doing this part of the evening. He’s excited and aroused. Lucifer keeps looking at him like he is wondering what the hell is wrong. Sam knows the mix of emotions that must be projecting through his soul are likely confusing.   
He gives up trying to ease into the subject halfway through dinner.  
“When we’re done eating I’m going to help you with your wings.”  
He hears the audible swallow Luc makes. Sam’s shocked he manages to get the forkful of food he had just put in his mouth down without choking. His eyes are wide and his body tenses.   
“Sam…”  
“I’m really sorry. But this is not open for debate.”   
He can see Luc struggling with what to do next. They have butted heads before and they’re pretty evenly matched. Both so very certain that they’re right. Sam doesn’t want to loose the possibility of this evening. He reaches across the table and touches Luc’s face.  
“Please baby, I want this. I want you, so much. Let me.”  
Lucifer doesn’t respond but he closes his eyes and tips his head into Sam’s hand.   
Sam has no memory of the rest of dinner.  
There is no way they are going to fit in the shower together. They’ve tried that already. Boy have they tried. But Sam is a sasquatch and Lucifer’s wingspan is way larger than Cas’s. It’s frustratingly hopeless. They settle in the living room on a blanket of towels, hair still wet from their respective showers, Luc’s wings still damp, both of them having just dragged on pajama pants. Luc sits facing the sofa and he presses his head into the seat of it as Sam drags some of the towels through his wings. There is an occasional hiss of discomfort as Sam reaches the area inflamed by the day’s events.  
There’s nothing else they can do until his wings dry out. Sam spends the time rubbing and massaging Lucifer’s tense muscles up and down his back and around his neck. When he feels the tension start to ease he presses in closer and rests his head between Lucifer’s wings.  
“Talk to me.”  
“About what?”  
“Tell me a story. Something about you I don’t know yet.”  
Lucifer has lived a very long time. Where Cas is considered a youth Lucifer is creeping up to middle age by angel standards. He’s been around. This is a game they play a lot. Sam fascinated by his lover’s history. Stories that predate cell phones, Ipods, video games. Luc launches into a tale about Woodstock. Or of him trying to get to Woodstock but never making it because this bus full of hippies he ran into ended up on a three week bender of hallucinogens and he woke up in Hong Kong with no idea how he got there.   
“And man, were my wings tired.”  
Sam shoves him laughing.   
“Jerk.”  
They chuckle together.   
“Sam, I’m not sure how to do this. If you do this I don’t think I’ll be able to keep myself from finishing the bond. If you’re not sure…I need you to be sure.”  
“This isn’t about your wings at all is it? This is about before. About Uriel.”  
Lucifer’s first potential, Uriel died long before Sam was ever born. An accident that nearly robbed Sam of this chance for happiness. Sam’s heart aches at how decades later the scars are still so fresh for Lucifer.   
“I don’t want to be left behind again.”  
He can hear the grief in Lucifer’s voice.   
“Then let me do this. Let’s finish this process. That way, wherever we go, we’ll do it together.”  
I want to belong to you.   
He projects the thought with his soul as hard as he can. Lucifer’s body shifts in front of him. His wings lifting to flutter up and then fan backwards touching Sam’s sides.   
“Do we need to have long drawn out discussion on how to do this?”  
Sam laughs  
“No, I’ve done some research.”  
“You didn’t ask Dean or Cas did you? I don’t want to think about them doing this. It’s just gross.”  
Sam ignores him in favor of sliding his hands up under Lucifer’s wings on his back. He slides his fingers along the joint until he finds the glands. They are already weeping.  
“I thought I had to press on them.”  
Sam hesitates, he has the technical aspects of this down but this wasn’t a part of his research.  
“It’s ok. That happens. I’m just…excited.”  
He sees the blush crawl up Lucifer’s neck and can feel his own face turn red. His fingers go numb for a second and he has to think about Aunt Ethel’s 1000 year old cat, Petunia and her one eye to keep from just exploding right then.  
You think you’re excited.  
Sam wets his fingers with the oil; listening intently to Lucifer’s ragged breathing. He works his way slowly from the base up the inside and then the back of Lucifer’s right wing. Luc’s wings are a mess. Feathers displaced from lack of care and it takes Sam three passes until he gets the form completely back in place on just that one side. His arms ache from the effort but it’s worth it. His wings aren’t grey; they’re silver, a smokey deep silver that Sam watches shine as the light catches his feathers. They’re beautiful.   
By the time Sam is halfway through the back side of Lucifer’s left wing he is twitching and moaning into the couch. The skin is almost raw from them trying to peel that crap off and Sam is relieved when he is finished with that part. He slides Lucifer around and distracts him with lazy kisses until his muscles relax and his wings drop. Sam finishes grooming the inside of Luc’s wing while straddling his lap. It’s distracting but so hot. He’s trying not to grind himself into Lucifer’s stomach, well, too much. But he’s been hard forever and it feels so good.  
I don’t think there is a drop of blood left anywhere else in my body. It’s all gone to my dick.  
“Ok. I’m finished.”  
The shaky response comes from around his collarbone.   
“Do you want to go wash your hands?”  
“Is that a trick question?”  
Because seriously, hell no, he does NOT want to go wash his hands; he wants to get laid like RIGHT NOW with a side order of mated for life, please.   
“Sam, I’m not like Castiel. I can’t let you mark yourself as mine and then wait around for a year to make you my mate. If you don’t go wash it off I’m going to have to take you. Tonight. Now.”  
Sam shoves Lucifer back against the side of the coach dragging his hands along the oil on his back as he goes. He doesn’t say anything; he just reaches up and drags his own hand down the side of his neck, across his chest, and over his stomach. Trailing the oil the whole way. Sam’s hoping to make a point here. How much clearer does he need to get?  
Yeah, that about does it.  
Lucifer is on him in a hot second. Sam hears the growl and has enough time to grab Lucifer’s shoulders before there is a giant flap of his wings and Luc is carrying Sam back to the bedroom.   
It’s horrible, embarrassing, and, holy fuck, hot as crap!  
“I’m way too old to be mating on the floor.”  
It’s all happening so fast. They’re naked, hands everywhere Luc’s pulling his hair and Sam is pretty sure he tore some feathers out of Luc’s wings. This is happening, right now. Everything feels so good and Oh My God this is awesome; until they get to the actual “You wanna put that where?” part of the event. Because Sam is a brave, open-minded guy. But he has never actually made it to this part before with another dude. In their time together they have covered pretty much everything but this and as much as he loves Lucifer he does not want his first time for that to be played on fast forward. He jerks at the first touch and everything slams to a halt. Luc is looking at him wild eyed and frantic melting into shock and then concern.  
“You’ve never done this before?”  
“Yeah, um, we covered that prior.”  
“I thought you meant with an angel.”  
“No….I meant with a DUDE.”  
“Oh. I can’t do this.”  
“WHAT THE FUCK?”  
Sam is exploding off the bed before he can think about it and rummaging around on the floor for his lost pants. The whole while yelling  
“Dude, you are such an asshole, I can’t believe I’m going to go through all of this to get here and then you back the fuck out. Screw you, dickhead. I’m sorry I’m not overly experienced with this sort of thing but damn I love you and I want to marry you and you’re going to tell me no because I don’t meet with your standards for expertise or something. Kiss my ass. What do you mean you can’t do this?”  
He’s panting. Lucifer is wide eyed crouching on the bed.   
“I mean I’m not calm enough to take care of you for your first time. You’re going to have to do me.”  
Oh.  
“Oh.”  
OH!  
“Sometime tonight please. I’m aging here.”  
Things go a lot smoother after that. They have to stop several times as Lucifer keeps snickering off an on. He sooths Sam’s raw nerves with kisses and many a whispered “I love you” Sam’s nervous, his hands shaking and suddenly this it, you know, this isn’t just about sex this about forever and belonging and never getting left behind again for either of them; this is huge.   
“Look at me baby.”   
Sam can feel it before it happens. This pressure sliding up under his skin and into his heart. He’s so focused on it he misses the moment Lucifer actually falls apart beneath him. Too caught up in the light and heat and love pouring into his soul. He leans down and whispers “Mine” into his mate’s ear as the world falls away and gets remade anew for both of them.   
It’s the banging that wakes him.   
“DUDE, get up; it’s time for lunch! Lazy bitch.”  
Sam’s going to kill Dean. The man has no respect.   
“JERK!”   
And where the hell is my husband?  
The last thing Sam expects this morning of all mornings is to wake up alone.   
He finds Lucifer up on the roof of Cas and Dean’s house. The late morning sun making his hair look golden and shiny his wings stretched out and gleaming in a way that Sam has never seen them before.   
“I can see your halo.”  
“Don’t go Beyonce on me.”  
Sam feels the tug on his soul. He pushes outward and smiles when his mates grace pushes back into him.  
“How are you doing that?”  
“I don’t know. Why are we on the roof?”  
“I was waiting.”  
“Waiting for what, babe?”  
“Waiting for you. Come fly with me.”  
“Luc? Really?”  
“Sam, you’re already my mate. The flight is symbolic. I just want to show you off.”  
“So I’m a trophy husband then?”  
“Absolutely. When we get back you can rub it in Dean’s face that you’ve been able to sense our bond since its inception. He’ll probably cry.”  
Sam chuckles as he is pulled close and lifted up.   
Dean’s gonna be so pissed!


	13. Chapter 13

Part 13

I am so pissed off.   
Dean’s trying not to think too hard about it. He really is trying. He doesn’t want to give Sam and Lucifer the satisfaction of actually showing them how mad he is that Sam got the full monty from day one with being bonded. It took Dean like a freakin YEAR to figure out what that weird, tingly, feeling was that kept happening. So he’s stewing; and plotting his revenge. The worst part being that he’s just not sure if Cas feels disappointed. I mean they kind of rub it in their faces with all their little touches and happy noises. It’s sickening. But how do you ask your husband if he’s sorry he got the dumb Winchester without sounding like you need a hug?  
“Dean, you’re being ridiculous.”  
Cas takes the coffee cup out of his hand and puts it on the table. He drags Dean until he is flopped on his back on the couch and then slides down on top of him. As Cas burrows his head up under Dean’s chin, Dean slides his fingers through the feathers on the backside of both of Cas’s wings. There is a contented noise from his husband. Dean feels the knot in this chest loosen.  
“I can feel you wallowing from the backyard.”   
Dean snorts. But he pushes his soul outward seeking Cas’s grace and is rewarded by warmth and affection sliding around him.   
“You don’t regret this do you?”  
Cas grabs his nipple and twists hard.  
“Only on the days when you act like an idiot.”  
“So everyday huh?”  
“Except Thursdays. You’re pretty good on Thursdays.”  
Dean laughs, Cas holds him tighter and Dean can feel Cas wrap his grace more tightly around them both; his wings making a cocoon around their bodies.   
“I have a life, a family, a home, children, brothers, and a mate. What part of this do you think I could possibly regret? All the things I have here; I have because of you.”  
Dean doesn’t have the words to respond to that right now. He tugs on Cas’s always messy hair until big, blue eyes appear in front of him. Then he kisses Cas. It’s slow and wet and hot. The next time Cas reaches for his nipple Dean doesn’t complain. He forgets about why he was grouchy in the first place.  
Jesse and Adam come home from school in a flurry of book bags and requests for food. They eat so much Dean had to get a second fridge put in the garage to hold the food they needed. It’s pretty awesome. He’s always glad when he gets a random day off from the Salvage Yard during the week. Though truth be told he can’t be anything but grateful to Bobby. The grumpy old guy not only took him and then Chuck in when they were kids but then Cas, Lucifer, Sam, and their kids. Even though he complains he’s not running a halfway house or a daycare center it’s always Bobby that makes sure the back office is empty in time for the kids to do their homework. Bobby that leaves the simple oil changes for Adam to practice on in the afternoons. Bobby that makes extra sandwiches at lunch and holds them for the boys to have after school.   
Just don’t call him Grandpa.  
Dean still has the bruises from where he slipped up one day and said it to Bobby’s face. Adam, being the genius manipulator that he is, calls Bobby “Pops” a derivative of the name he uses for Dean. Ellen told them in private that Bobby loves it. So it stuck even if only the kids are able to actually say it without getting their asses kicked. Adam’s 16 now. Dean’s been teaching him how to drive and they have been fixing up a beat up old pick up truck for him to have once he gets his license. He grades are good, his attitude is getting better. There is still a lot of push and pull with him. Bobby reminds Dean when he is worn out and frustrated that he acted the same way when he was kid. Some times Dean can actually see Adam fight against a lifetime of instinct to run or act out. More and more often Adam is winning those internal battles and Dean is so proud of him.   
“Leah Morgan likes Adam.”  
Jesse imparts this information as though it is gospel.   
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah. She asked him out on a date.”  
Now that is interesting information.  
“Did you say yes?”  
Adam sitting at the kitchen table, choking down a hot pocket, looks at Dean like he has lost his mind.  
“No. Why would I?”  
“Well a girl asks you out if you like her you say yes. So you don’t like her?”  
“I don’t like anybody like that, pop. I’m just not interested.”  
Dean has been a 16 year old boy before and if it moved in a way slightly human he was interested. Hell at 16 sometimes you’re interested even if it’s not moving; you just can’t help it. But Adam is not. In fact, he’s never mentioned being interested in anyone, human, angel, male, female, period. It’s weird. Talking to Cas about it is out of the question. The guy has a maternal instinct that puts mother bears to shame. If Dean blurts out he thinks something might be off with one of the kids Cas’ll have them drug in for a cat scan ASAP. He bites the bullet and on a drive to pick up a broken down Hummer he just asks the kid.  
“I don’t know. It just seems so complicated.”  
“What does?”  
“All of it. Flirting, dating, sex. I just don’t want to deal with it. The kids I go to school with are stupid. One day they like someone and the next day they don’t. I can’t take it. I would rather just come home.”  
“So it’s not that you aren’t interested.”  
“Oh I’m interested; just not interested enough to put up with the bullshit. And can we please never talk about this again?”  
“Absolutely.”   
Jesse is another matter all together. At ten years old he makes Dean think of what Sam must have been like when he was that age. After living with them for so long he finally goes to sleep in his own room and if he needs something he asks them instead of Adam. Cas is bursting with excitement one day when he gets home from helping Sam overhaul a police cruiser.  
“Can you feel it?”  
Dean is overwhelmed with the amount of pressure Cas’s grace is shoving at him all at once. But there is a part in there that he has never felt before.   
“What is that?”  
Cas just beams. “What do you think it is?”  
Dean takes a deep breath and pushes his soul outward to touch this new thing. When he connects there is a happy pulse in response and he hears Jesse tell Adam “Pop’s home.”  
“Jesse?”  
Turns out that angelic children share a soul bond with their parents. When Jesse had read about it in one of the books Sam had given him on angels he had wanted to try it. It had taken weeks of attempts and some help from Luc but they had finally made it work. If Dean thought Cas was proud; the kid looked like someone had lit him up from the inside out.   
Jesse’s joy is quickly followed by Adam’s depression and withdrawal. Dean waits it out. It’s so hard. Everything in him wants to just shake the kid until he tells him what’s wrong. Adam’s come a long way though. Dean has faith in him. It all pays off a week later when Adam slides up beside him on the back porch one night and staring out into the back yard whispers “You told me I could tell you anything right?”  
“Of course you can.”  
There is a long silence and Dean is afraid to look, to move, anything that might make Adam run. He can see his son’s hands twist and grip on the porch railing.   
“I’m left out. I want to be able to feel it too.”  
“The bond?”  
Adam slumps against Dean’s side and he feels more than sees when Adam nods his head. Dean wraps his arm around Adam and pulls him close. He wasn’t expecting the kid to be so honest. Abandonment is Adam’s biggest issue. Jesse’s birth parents died. Adam’s mother is out there somewhere. She just didn’t want him more than she wanted her drugs.   
“It’s not fair. I’m part of this family too. I want all of the parts that come with it. I don’t want to be left out.”  
“We’ll fix it, Adam. We’ll find a way.”  
My brother in law is awesome.   
Lucifer is an observant little shit. When they all sit down together to discuss the problem of “how are we going to do this”; he just gets up from the table walks into Sam’s office and comes back out with a dusty old ass book. He plops it into the center of the kitchen table and everyone looks at him with matching faces of what the fuck?   
“Page 78 has the answer. When we started working with Jesse I thought Adam might also want to participate. I called some people I know and they lead me to this text. It’s going to take a lot of work but my contact says it’s accomplishable.”  
Cas has to wait in line to hug him for it. Dean’s up from his chair and has his arms thrown around Luc before anyone can react. There is wing flapping and Dean is about to jerk away and apologize before he feels his brother’s husband hug him back. Cas squeezes in with them as well and Dean holds his arm out when Sam gets up yelling “NO WAY DUDE” but it looks like it is group hug time; Sam and his long ass arms wrapping around all three of them. Dean’s groaning and Lucifer is laughing his ass off.   
Dean almost feels bad about hosing down their kitchen floor with cooking spray during his lunch break the next day. Almost. Until he hears the yelling all the way across the yard later that night and gets to the kitchen window in enough time to watch them try to get up on the slick floor and fall.   
And fall again.  
And fall again.  
And fall again.  
Oh that’s never going to get old.   
It is a process. Adam and Jesse already have a link so the first step is getting these two hyperactive, over-sensitive, boys to try and feel out each other. They try everything they can think of to set up a soothing environment for them to practice in. Nothing happens. Actually nothing happens at all until one afternoon they get into a fight over which video game to watch and it turns into a wrestling match. Adam is older and bigger but Jesse is stronger. It quickly turns ugly and Dean stands quietly hidden in the kitchen as Adam is chased up the steps to his room by an enraged Jesse. Adam locks him out and Jesse hits the door so hard it falls out of the wall, frame and all, and lands in the middle of Adams room.   
Dean can feel the blast of terror coming from Jesse’s grace. He hears Jesse yelling at Adam.  
“Get up, get up, you have to help me fix this! Our dad’s are gonna kill us both!”  
Adam’s not responding and Dean can only assume he is frozen in shock. Having your younger brother kick the door in on you is probably pretty freaky. Dean feels Jesse punch out with his grace toward Adam. It must have made an impact because as he backs out of the house he hears Adam scrambling to help Jesse get the door back into the wall. Years later Adam will tell Dean it felt like a bitch slap to the soul.   
They don’t ever have to try to link up again. It’s easy after that. Cas goes next and finds that he can access Adam’s link with Jesse and use that to find his way. It goes smoothly and Dean can see the tenseness leave Adam’s shoulders. Dean’s the one that feels left out now. Adam and Dean are both lacking the one component they need to make this work. Both of them are human; they are all soul and no grace. No way to make a direct link. They can just feel echoes of each other through the rest of their family.   
They’re having a driving lesson one day when Dean gets that maybe you can be the teacher and the student at the same time.  
“You and I don’t need the bond, you know.”  
Out of the blue from the driver’s seat. Dean looks over at his son white knuckling the steering wheel.   
“We don’t?”  
“Nope.”  
“And why is that?”  
“If you were going to let me go, you would have done it that day in the garage when I hit you. It’s nice to get to feel Jesse and dad, to get that extra sense of support and stuff. But I don’t need that with you. You’re not going to give up on me. You’re my father and I get it now. You love me; and I love you too.”  
Dean looks over and finds Adam looking back. He’s overcome with emotion for a moment.   
My son just told me he loved me for the first time.  
They’re both so distracted they miss that the light is red; rear ending the car in front of them that had stopped. When the driver gets out they both let our identical moans of distress.  
It’s Zachariah’s car.   
Lucifer laughs until he is hysterical and has to give the phone to Cas to find out where to send the tow truck. Dean gets a lecture on driving safely from his husband while he waits for the ride. Sam comes to get them and snickers off and on the whole way back to the Salvage Yard. Dean overhears him telling Lucifer “Baby, this was way better than what we had planned.”  
Crap. Now I gotta deal with that too.   
Later that night as Cas comes to bed he turns to Dean and smiles as Dean finishes the story.  
“Then he told me he loved me.”  
“So you let him rear end a car?”  
“I was distracted. We were having a moment.”  
“Next time you want to have a moment with our children have them PULL OVER.”  
“Yes sir.”  
“Adam is going to turn into a very good man.”  
Cas is distracting as hell when he wants to be; trailing the tips of his wings over Dean’s bare chest and stomach; along the waistband of his pants.   
“What makes you so sure of that?”  
“Our son is a lot like you, Dean. And you are the best man I have ever known.” He means it too. Dean can tell, he can feel it in his touch; in the press of his grace.   
“I love you babe.”  
“I love you too. Now less talking and more action here okay?”  
Dean laughs. It’s good to be wanted.


	14. Chapter 14

Part 14

He stands in front of the bathroom mirror and spreads first one wing and then the other. It’s been several decades since he has seen them look this good. Since before he knew what it was like to have your heart die and then keep on beating. 

Since before the fall. 

Since before he walked away from everyone that he once thought loved him.   
Since before he happened upon a Salvage Yard, made a new family, became a Winchester, felt his heart live again. 

Since before Sam.

Sam.

Lucifer decides that life is an odd thing. Something so full of unexplainable events that even after a hundred years he is hopeless to grasp, sometimes, the direction he is going in. But today he knows where his path leads. He’s going to give his new mate his wedding present. He’s going to give Sam back the other half of his family; and he’s going with backup. 

“Oh, this is going to be a blast.” Dean slides into the driver’s seat of the impala and gives him a tired smile. 

Sam’s finally finished his thesis. He’s defended it with ease and has been approved for graduation. Lucifer will be damned if his parents are going to miss it. Family is important, having lost one already, Lucifer is well aware how painful it can be. Sam doesn’t speak about the pain Lucifer can see in his soul but it’s clear that what he wants is reconciliation with his adopted family. If that’s even at all possible.

“What if they won’t open the door?” Dean questions. 

“They’ll open the door.” Luc looks out the window. He’s unconcerned by this train of thought. 

“What if they won’t let us in?” Dean’s voice drops an octave. His soul shifts in discomfort. 

“They’ll let us in.” 

“What if they call the police?”

“They’ll probably call the police. I left bail money with Bobby.” Lucifer is certain it was a necessary thing to do; Cas will be frantic and Sam would refuse to bail them out. 

“Ok. So long as we have a plan.” Dean sits back and hits the radio. Apparently the though of possible jail time settles his nerves. 

Dean’s a worthy mate for Castiel. He’s direct, loyal, and dedicated tirelessly to his family. Lucifer admires his bravado as well as his well protected, sensitive, disposition. Dean is a softy. But it’s hard to tell that if you’re not family so he’s great back up for this kind of thing. There’s no one Lucifer would rather have at his back. Cas wanted to come but just in case everything goes to hell they needed someone to take care of the kids and keep Sam from freaking out. Luc’s hoping to have this over and done with before Sam even knows what hit him. 

“Can I help you?” Sam’s mother is much like Lucifer remembers her from when they picked up his stuff last year. She’s shocked but able to keep up an appropriate facade. 

“We’re here to speak to you about Sam.” Lucifer feels the panic that shoots through her soul. Her eyes widen and tear up.

“Did something happen to my Sammy?”

“No, no! I just wanted to give you something and talk.” He can feel her relax a bit and to his and Dean’s shock she invites them in. 

“What is this all about?” Sam’s father’s voice is stern and Lucifer has to count backward from ten to get himself under control; bad enough, but he can sense Dean’s whole being jerk in response to the authoritative tone of his voice.

Maybe I should have brought Castiel.

“We just wanted to give you this and ask you to please consider attending.”

The envelope carries an invitation to Sam’s graduation as well as a celebration afterwards in honor of their mating. There is utter silence as they read.

“You and Sam are married?”

“Yes. I’m very lucky. You’re son is phenomenal.”

A picture falls out of the envelope and Lucifer turns to look at Dean with a question in his eyes. He didn’t know that was there. It’s from when the boys' adoption was finalized. All of them piled together at the courthouse, the whole family. He and Sam are in the back Sam looking at him instead of the camera with a warm smile on his face. Dean leans forward and starts naming off the people in the picture. 

Sam’s mother points to Adam and Jesse. “These are your sons?”

“Yes. This was taken the day they we finalized their adoption.”

“You adopted them.” Lucifer can sense the shifting in her soul as she looks at the pictures. 

“Yeah, like you adopted Sam.”

Lucifer will never understand how Dean Winchester, blunt, crude, loud, irritating, Dean Winchester knew the perfect thing to say. But it works; Sam’s mother’s eyes fill with tears and she brokenly chokes out, “I miss my son.” 

Dean slides his hand over to hold hers as he says, so kindly “He never went anywhere you weren’t welcome to follow.” 

And suddenly, I have in-laws.

“That was sweet. Will you hold me?”  
“Shut UP dude, just get in the car.”

It’s a good enough thank you between their family. Sam is going to be so pleased. 

The tension that creeped between them is gone now that the mating is finished. He'd been too self-absorbed to notice that his own fears of rejection were driving a wedge between himself and his potential. His mate is tenacious and he will be forever grateful that Sam wasn't willing to let him go. Luc feels like the hole in his grace is healed over. The passion in Sam’s soul was so strong that when the mating bond was forming it was not his grace that reached out first but Sam’s soul that reached for him. Lucifer revels in the feel of his mate’s soul tangling with his grace. It’s a rare evening that they take to themselves. 

Both of them enjoy the activity and hilarity that is now in place at Dean and Cas’s home with the boys finally starting to settle in. Children are a gift; in angelic society they are rare as angels live such a long time. Humans reproduce wildly and without care; angels may mate and never have offspring, or if they do it is usually carefully planned. Lucifer is slightly envious. He doubts he and Sam will ever have the opportunity that was dropped in Dean and Cas’s lap. 

Sam is sprawled out naked on their bed, half on top of Lucifer. His face tucked in next to Luc’s shoulder and an arm and leg thrown casually over his mate. Sam is dozing in and out of sleep, while Lucifer slides his fingers through Sam’s hair over and over again. The lazy affection and sweet arousal that travels across their bond makes him smile. Sam may be sleepy, but he’s not uninterested. One slow drag of his hand down Sam’s back with the added scratch of his nails included on the way back up has Sam leaning up on his elbow and squirming for kisses. 

“I love you.”

Sam’s happy hum into his mouth is answer enough for now and Lucifer forgets that he was planning to letting Sam know about his parents when he feels the sensitive feathers on the inside of his left wing being twisted and tugged in his mates hand. 

He really should have been more proactive. Cas shoots him an evil glare the next day from the underside of a Ford Explorer when Sam starts yelling, “What do you mean you invited my parents?”

 

“I thought you would be happy.”

“So you and Dean go behind my back and drive to my parent’s house; that I haven’t spoken to in like nine months, and invite them to my graduation and our party without telling me and then I have to hear about it from CAS? What about this is supposed to make me happy? Or were you going for a heart attack?”

Sam has a flair for drama. All Winchesters do it seems. 

Lucifer sees Dean duck and cover. He’s going to have to get that little bastard later for running out on him. Sam’s hands are shaking and his soul is rolling with fear and desperation. 

“Do you want me to tell them not to come?”

“What? No.”

“You’re upset; I thought it would make you happy. I’m sorry. I thought this would help. You’ve been so sad. I don’t want you to lose this; not over me.”

It seems to take the wind out of his sails because Sam slouches and shrugs. “They actually said they would come?”

Lucifer pulls his mate in for a hug and reassurance pulses through his grace into their bond. He knows that Sam is not really afraid they will attend. He’s scared to get excited for fear that they won’t.

Graduation day is hectic. Sam is a mess; he vacillates between accomplished joy and abject terror. Lucifer starts thinking he could use a drink at about 9:30 in the morning. Dean laughs at the suggestion; Cas stabs him in the hand with the toothpick he is using to get the fruit tray ready. It hurt too.

“Neither of you will make asses of yourselves today. Sam needs us to be calm and supportive of him. We will give his parents some respect.”

“What if they act like assholes to us?”

Dean has a point there. They can be as nice as they want to be but Sam’s parents have had a long term issues with the lifestyle he has been leading out here. They might not want to get along. 

Cas’s response is brief and impactful. “Then we will kill them and burn the bodies so that no one will know.”

My brother rocks. 

They show up at around eleven. Sam greets them with a nervous hug and awkwardness abounds when the rest of the family is introduced. They make it through the graduation without incident and everything seems to be going well at the party.   
Though the addition of Ash and his sudden fascination with Chuck is just disturbing. 

Dean would later tell him he saw them out by the garage that evening and his mind will forever compare it to two nerdy weasels wrestling together in a sack. The mere thought alone makes Luc want to scrub his brain.

Sam’s mother has been fascinated with Jesse and Adam all day. Lucifer manages to overhear her questioning Adam on his current living situation. “But wouldn’t you rather have a normal family? You could have a mother.”

Lucifer winces. This is going to be ugly. 

“I have a mother. She’s a junky who left me at a crack house for collateral when I was six. Then when they took me from her, she wouldn’t go to treatment to get me back. But thanks for bring up a boat load of good memories.” Adam slams down his plate of food and stalks out passing Sam as he goes. “Hey Sam, your mom’s a bitch.”

The back door to the house slams on his exit. Sam’s mother looks like one of those republican senators’ wives standing at the press conference when they find out their husband is having an affair. 

Lucifer snorts. He just can’t help it. This is horrible and so tense; he wishes he had just bought them both tickets to Tahiti. Upon hindsight this has to be the worst wedding present ever. He’s just overcome. He laughs until there are tears running down his face and looks up between gasps for breath to see Dean laughing as well. Cas is yanking on his arm and trying to shove him back into the kitchen but Dean just stands there wheezing along with Luc. 

Sam’s open mouthed stare doesn’t help matters and neither does Cas’s indignant rage. Dean is going to be sleeping on the couch for a week because of this and Lucifer knows it but he just can’t pull himself together. He finally just gasps out apologies in-between fits of the giggling, picks up Adam’s plate of food, and drags Dean out the door with him. 

They find Adam on the roof. His shoulders slumped and face tired. “I really screwed up didn’t I?”

 

Lucifer hands him his plate and he and Dean sit down next to him on opposite sides. There is silence for a long moment and then he and Dean busts out laughing again. 

Adam’s eyes widen and his mouth drops open. “What happened?”  
“Well kid, let’s just say you, me, and your dad here are all in a hell of a lot of trouble right now.” 

Dean chuckles from his other side.“Yep. We’re just gonna hide out here with you for a while.”

Adam is silent and contemplative for a moment. “It’s not going to work you know.”  
“Why not?”

“My other dad can fly.”

That’s a very good point. 

Whatever went on after that Luc may never know. But by late in the evening when he, Dean, and Adam creep off the roof; the rest of the family is curled up in the living room looking at pictures and laughing. To Lucifer’s shock Adam apologizes immediately to Sam’s mother; who hugs him and says she's sorry as well. They leave giving Dean and Lucifer contemplative glances and Cas and Sam big hugs. Promising to call and asking if they can come for another visit in a few months. As Sam watches them drive off Lucifer feels something that he can only call hope blossom in his mate’s soul. 

He would like to think that this is the end of it. They will all run off into the sunset together and Sam will be loved and supported without conflict between his two families. But life isn’t like that. The roads you travel aren’t always debris free. It’s a beginning, something they can build onto, and that will have to be enough for now. Lucifer is grateful for that.

He’s also pretty pleased the next morning when he wakes up to slow kisses and gentle stroking of his wings. 

“I’m sorry that my present to you turned out to be so complicated.”

“You mean my family? Dude, families are always complicated.”

That’s so very true.

Sam drops onto the floor and drags a box out from under the bed. He hands it to Luc.  
“What’s this?”

“Open it. It’s my gift to you.”

Inside the box is a large copper feather; made of metal and detailed in its design. 

“You gave me a feather once, when you asked to court me. I read it was traditional to exchange feathers at mating. But I seem to be lacking in the feather department. I had it made for you.”

Lucifer picks it up and strokes his hands along its lines. 

“Dean made this.”

“Yeah. It took him forever too. He’s pretty proud of it.”

“I love it Sam. Thank you. Also, your brother is going to kill me.”

Right on cue he hears the back door to the other house slam open and Dean screaming from across the yard. “Lucifer, you feather brained son of a bitch. I am going to kill you.”

He and Sam poke their heads up to look out the window and see a mostly naked, covered in feathers, Dean Winchester stalking toward the house.

“You tarred and feathered my brother?”

“It’s not tar.”

“What is it then?”

“I have no idea but Ash swears it will come off with liberal applications of baby oil.”  
At least that’s what I think he said.


	15. Chapter 15

Part 15

Thank God for Chuck Shirley. 

If it weren’t for him then Sam’s nut job of a college roommate would still be sleeping on the sofa at Sam’s house and Lucifer would still be acting like he had a a mile long pole shoved up his ass . Chuck and Ash seem to like each other well enough; pretty darn well in fact, based on what Dean had seen by the garage the night of Sam’s graduation. So when Chuck offered to let Ash stay at his place it wasn’t all that surprising. Dean sort of thought Lucifer might cry with relief. Ash is an acquired taste. But then so is Chuck.

He would have been out sooner but Dean had repeatedly told him how much Luc and Sam loved him staying with them. That’s what you get when you tar and feather your brother in law. 

Dean just doesn’t understand the attraction between Chuck and Ash. He has known Chuck since they were eleven. Both of them ended up at Bobby’s after a crash course in delinquency. Dean’s involved what probably should have been grand theft auto and Chuck's was possession with intent to sell. 

Sell what you ask? Anything he could get his hands on. 

Chuck’s never been really good with people. He has an anxiety disorder that could make a chipmunk on crack look calm. Cas took right to him though. But then Cas has this way of just staring at you until you either calm down enough to make sense or implode. He doesn’t really care which happens first. But Chuck and Ash hit it off from day one. Dean could almost hear the slowly played romantic music echoing as their little nerdy eyes met across the lawn. Ash is kind of a weirdo. But he’s not Becky; so that’s a huge plus. 

Chuck described his relationship with Becky to Dean once as a really fast ride at an amusement park. He said even though the lines were long and the ride was rough; you had such a good time you wanted to ride it again. Dean figures after about ten rides you must start to get nauseated. Or maybe the ride breaks down. Either way, she packed up and left town for who knows where. But Bobby is still using Clorox wipes every time he goes near the copier. 

Nobody says much about the big Ash and Chuck slumber party. Let’s face it; in this family you got to get pretty darn weird to be talked about. None of them are that stable. 

One night at dinner Jesse pops up with, “Are Uncle Chuck and Ash like, together?”

Dean shrugs over his pasta “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Dude is anyone in this family straight?” Adam busts out from the other side of the table. 

“Well there’s still hope for the two of you boys but the rest of us seem to be pretty gay.” Cas doesn’t even look up from his dinner when he says it. 

Adam turns to Jesse smiling “Man, I think we’re screwed.”

Jesse just shrugs and keeps on shoveling food in. The kid eats like he is never going to be fed again. 

It’s later that night when Dean realizes this could be trouble. 

“Do you think the boys have enough exposure to women?” Cas is working a knot out of Dean’s sore shoulder when he drops the bomb. 

“Fuck Cas. Seriously?” He was warm and relaxed and happy and now this.

“Adam’s got a point Dean. Almost every member of our family is male and attached to another man. What kind of example does that set for the boys? What if they find themselves attracted to a potential mate that’s female and don’t know what to do?” He sounds so serious Dean almost hates to tease him. 

Almost.

“Baby, they are teenage boys. No matter what we show them or who they’re exposed to, unless we get them a hooker for their birthdays, I can guarantee you they will have no idea what to do.” Dean pulls on his brightest smile. 

Cas shoves him right out of the bed. It’s not hitting the floor that hurts so much as when Cas steps on his chest as he walks over him to the bathroom. 

Fuck!

By the end of the week Ash has installed a pneumatic lift in the garage. It’s awesome. 

Even Lucifer takes a moment to pat it gently before huffing back to the office as though this is all beneath him. Bobby asks Dean at some point during the week who hired Ash. Dean thought Bobby did. He manages not to laugh until Bobby walks away huffing something about the Salvage Yard not being a fucking halfway house. But Dean knows the truth, Bobby has always felt compelled to take in strays. 

“How long is your buddy staying?” Dean’s not worried about it, but hell, the guy got a degree in astrophysics or some such shit. Chuck refills the office supplies and is halfway through writing some stupid book about these two brothers that drive around hunting monsters. The book and this thing is Ash are the dumbest things Dean has ever heard of. Why is Ash even here?

Sam shrugs “I don’t know. Until he gets bored I guess. With Ash it’s hard to tell.” 

It’s rare that Dean gets five seconds alone with his brother these days, between the kids and the husbands. He grabs his chance to check up on his brother while he can. “How’s married life treating you Sammy?”

There's a grin from under that flop of messy hair “You checking up on me, big brother?”

“Always.” It’s true too. 

“It’s great Dean. Everything is just…great.” Sam has this look that says more than his words. He kind of lights up inside and Dean feels that last little bit of tension leave his chest. He’s happy, Sammy’s happy. They’re doing alright. 

“Cool. So, how long are you staying?” Because that’s really what Dean’s been wondering. Sam graduated and he has a career plan. Things are going to change. 

“Dean you are such a jerk. Is that what you’re worried about?” Sam’s got this look on his face that is somewhere between amused and constipated. Dean dubs it Bitch Face number 187. 

“What? You worked your ass off for that degree. You should use it.” Deans wants better for his brother than scraping grease out from under his nails for the rest of his life. 

“I am using it. I’m writing an article about angel and human relations based on my thesis. I’m going to see if I can get it published. Maybe turn into a researcher. Dude, I’m staying right here. Where else would I want to be?” He shoves Dean a little bit, just enough to knock him off balance. 

“Bitch.”

“Jerk.”

My life is so cool. 

Jesse starts molting over the summer. It’s just the weirdest thing Dean has ever seen. Cas molts; it’s no big deal. Just a couple of extra loose feathers here and there. It’s nothing like this. The kid has feathers fluffing and puffing out all over the place. They find them everywhere. Dean’s scared for a while he is going to end up with two naked wings hooked on his back. Luc and Cas swear it’s not true, though. They say it has something to do with him losing the last of his downy baby feathers. So now Dean has two kids going through puberty. 

It sucks too. Adam has always had a low level of PMS. You learn to live with it. Jesse has been the good kid. He’s sweet and affectionate. Now it’s like living with the antichrist. He is irritable, itchy, bitchy, grumpy, and foul. Dean and Sam are mortified. Cas and Lucifer just laugh their asses off. This is some kind of right of passage for angels it seems and they both have some fond memories of their time going through it. 

Dean couldn’t give a shit. He just wants his kid back to normal. Dean’s definition of normal, though, is pretty weird even on a good day. 

“Move over shithead.” Typical evening at the Winchesters house; Jesse and Adam fighting over who gets to sit closer to the TV. Adam’s nickname for Jesse firmly seated in the "I love my brother but don’t you dare say so" category. 

“Make me dick.” Jesse is getting better with the name calling. His first couple of attempts were pretty rough. 

Where did he get assbutt from anyway?

Dean watches as the scuffling ensues. It’s a standard event. Adam never has been able to miss an invitation to rough house; even though Jesse can totally kick his ass at this point. They end up falling off the couch and onto the floor and Jesse’s winning this round until Adam reach up and yanks a whole handful of feathers out of his left wing and rams them down the back of Jesse’s pants. 

“Ooooooooh.” Dean turns to see Cas standing by the fridge. The boys are just staring at each other. Then Jesse twitches, just a little, but it’s warning enough and Adam is out the door and running across the yard before Dean can blink. You got to give the kid credit, he knows when to retreat. Jesse just grabs the remote and plops back on the couch.

“He’s going to get Adam for that later huh?” Dean smiles as Cas wraps his arms around him from behind. 

“Absolutely. But you’re not going to worry too much about it.” There’s a promise in that whisper and the trailing of kisses up behind his ear.

“Why’s that?” Please, oh please, let it involve us going to the bedroom. 

“Because you’re going to be too busy to care.” And Cas slides his hands down over Dean’s stomach to flip open the first two buttons on his jeans. 

Score! Bedroom it is.

Every so often, they draw a crowd. It’s not something any of them are used to. But Dean guesses that a flock of three angels and three humans going out Denny’s is probably more excitement than some people here get in their entire lives. They all hate the staring but frankly the Grand Slam Breakfast Combo is just too good. That and breakfast is the most important meal of the day. 

Zachariah even called Luc last week to see if he they would consider doing an interview for some angel newspaper. Dean’s not sure how Lucifer became the family spokesperson, but hell, he’s great at it. Luc’s just one of those guys that can tell someone to go to hell and by the end of the conversation they think it was their idea to go there in the first place. He’s smooth. 

“Of course I told them absolutely not.” Luc knows the deal. They’ve discussed it. No amount of money, no amount of anything is worth violating their children’s privacy and risking their safety. 

“Cool man. Thanks.” Dean is never going to be anything but grateful for Sam’s taste in men. 

“It’s something we are going to have to think about though, Dean.” Luc’s staring at him from over his cup of coffee.

“I don’t get it. Think about what?” Because what’s the big deal? They keep asking they keep getting turned down.

“Our family keeps growing. As we add new members it gets harder to lay low. We may be the only combined angel human family living in the open right now Dean. Sooner or later more people may find us, may want to talk to us, might need our help. We should be prepared.” Lucifer's deadly serious. It’s rare that he and Dean have such an adult discussion. Usually it’s all teasing and poking at each other. 

“Ok. So we need to think about it. I’ll talk to Cas.” He hates that too. Cas is going to worry. It’s just his nature. 

“So anyway, tell me about the plan for Bobby’s birthday? I want in on the gag.” Suddenly, they’re back on a topic that is much more comfortable for them both. 

They do talk it over, both as couples and in groups. But no one ever seemed to find an answer for the question of what do we do when? So they move on. Cas and Dean planning a vacation to Disney for the whole family over next Christmas. Sam and Luc discussing quietly, tentatively, the possibility of adoption and children. Bobby's making it clear to Ellen that if he finds Chuck and Ash in the storage room again he will kill, salt, and burn them both. Though Dean isn’t sure what the salt would be for. 

Bobby’s birthday is a blast. The male stripper was an awesome idea they can only thank Ellen for. Bobby may never forgive them. Jesse’s adult feathers start to grow in on his wings. They’re black as midnight. He is going to look like one major bad ass when he’s fully grown. 

Four months later, summer is fading and they’re moving into the start of fall. It’s not until then that Dean really gets what Lucifer meant about making a plan. One Tuesday morning when he is walking across the yard to pick up the next customer’s car he happens to turn toward the gate and sees two angels standing there side by side. They look very similar to one another though the female is significantly smaller than the male. 

Dean goes to greet them; after all his luck with angels is pretty good. “Can I help you?”

It’s the guy that speaks “Yes, my daughter and I are hoping we have the right place. Is this the garage that employs two angels?”

Dean’s a nice guy but he’s suspicious by nature and this is his family they’re talking about. “What difference does it make who works here? You need help with your car?”

The guy’s eyes narrow and Dean knows he can tell that he is hedging the question. “No, our car is fine. I’m looking for my brother.”

Dean can feel the tension creeping up his spine. “What’s your brother’s name? And assuming he’s here; who do I tell him is waiting?”

“My brother’s name is Lucifer. You can tell him Michael is here to see him.”

Oh sweet holy fuck.


	16. Chapter 16

Part 16

I haven’t seen my brother in over fifty years. 

It’s the thought he can’t shake during the trip to the salvage yard. Michael isn’t used to being nervous. Anxiety is not a feeling that angels have often or hide well. His grace is tossing and shaking as they wait for the man they met at the gate to return. What an odd place. 

The man he finished speaking with is clearly mated to an angel, but it is not his brother. Michael is almost certain of that. Surely, though, all these years have gone by he would still recognize the claim of his brother’s grace. If they are so far separated that he can’t, Michael won’t be able to forgive himself. 

“Father, you need to calm down,” she sounds so flat and level. His daughter has gift of disassociation that she clearly got from her mother. Michael has never been able to turn off his emotions in such a way. 

“Meg, this is as good as it'ss going to get right now.” He is aware of his wings flapping and twisting; but he has no more control of that than he does of his grace.

“You look like you’re going to attack someone. They might take it as an offensive move.” His little girl is almost not a little girl anymore. Her studies on humans and their social norms have led them down a winding path that ended here. Meg wasn’t willing to let it go when she discovered that there were angels living amongst the humans, creating a family, a community of their own. She wanted to see it. Then the word came that one of the angels there met the description of her missing uncle. 

And here they are.

He sees them coming from across the yard. Both angels walking toward them with intent. Their wings raised and arched over their backs. 

They’re expecting a fight?

Michael hopes with all of grace that his sins here can be forgiven. But how do you forgive someone who left you to suffer and die when you needed them the most? 

“Michael,” Lucifer’s tone if flat, but his eyes are sharp and posture defensive. 

Michael reaches out tentatively with his grace searching for their bond and finds…nothing. It’s just not there anymore. He closes his eyes to keep from weeping. 

“What do you want?” The other angel has a terrible scar on the inside of his right wing. It’s the first thing Michael sees when he snaps open his eyes. But when he opens his mouth to answer the question nothing comes. He wants his brother. But his claim on Lucifer is gone and this other angel with the scar has now clearly taken his place. 

He takes a step backwards. He’s not thinking clearly and this was a terrible idea. He should leave now. They should go and leave this family alone. They don’t belong here. 

“We came to talk. My father has some things he needs to discuss with you and I wanted to meet my uncle,” Meg’s voice is clear and her grace is steady as she reaches toward them both. Michael feels something in his chest relax when the brush of her grace against theirs is met with kindness instead of rejection. His daughter is welcome here at least. 

The introductions are tense all around. But Lucifer is clearly overjoyed to meet Meg and Sam and Dean Winchester are happy to have her as part of their family. Castiel and Dean’s children are a surprise but they are near Meg’s age. She gladly accepts the invitation to be shown around town. Michael takes deep breaths as they pull off in the older boy’s truck and drive away. 

No way to avoid this now. 

He’s not expecting the united front when he returns, Dean, Sam, Castiel, and Lucifer waiting for him in the office. The bonds between these two mated pairs are so strong. It’s like they are one unit at the heart of it. Michael’s pleased, that at least, his brother has found so much happiness here. 

“I never thought you would take a mate.” After he says it Michael wishes so badly to yank it right back. He can’t believe the first real sentence he has said to his brother in fifty years just brings up the most painful part of his life. 

Way to go idiot. 

Lucifer raises an eyebrow and takes in a deep breath. 

“Well, you’ve got class. I’ll give you that,” Dean says sarcastically. 

“I’m terribly sorry. I had this whole speech planned and now it’s useless.” Michael flops into the office chair and wipes his face with his hand. 

“What did you come here for?” Lucifer sounds so tired. Like this was on his list of terrible things that could happen. Like Michael is a bad thing to him. It hurts. 

“I came to grovel.” At least that’s the truth. It’s the least Michael can give him.

“You came to what?” Castiel sounds shocked. 

“I came to grovel. To beg. To get down on my knees if I have to and ask you to forgive me for being everything our parents expected me to be. I abandoned you, I hurt you, I shunned you because of my fear of disappointing our family and shaming them. It was a mistake. I have regretted it every second of my life since that day and though I know you can’t possible want to forgive me for it I still needed to tell you how sorry I am. What I did was inexcusable and I am eternally shamed by my actions.” Michael looks only at Lucifer who is staring back at him as though he has two heads.

“Ok. Everybody get out.” Castiel is using his arms and his wings to herd the Winchester brothers out of the room. “Out. Out.” He turns to Lucifer before shutting it behind them all “You find me when you’re done.” 

“You came to apologize? All these years of nothing and you show up here one day for this? Why?” Lucifer sinks down into the chair opposite Michael. 

“I have made so many mistakes. I wasted so much of my life trying to be the good son. I should have tried harder to be a good brother.” Michael can see how conflicted his brother is. Lucifer’s grace is shifting from anger to something like shock. 

“What do you want from me?” There is softness in Lucifer’s voice.

“I want a chance to be your friend. Even if there isn’t any room for me to be your brother again.” He doesn’t say that he wants his brother back. Michael knows he doesn’t have the right to ask Lucifer for that, not now, maybe not ever.

They get invited to dinner. 

Dinner at the Winchester’s is a loud and affectionate event. Meg is clearly pleased. She hums happily through her meal and as soon as it is over she begs to go see a movie with the boys. Michael allows it, Meg hasn’t looked so carefree in years. He learns a great deal about the Winchesters after the children are gone. The fact that Dean and Sam are so closely bound when they weren’t raised together gives him some hope for his own situation. Though, he can admit to himself that he is jealous because Cas is a good brother to Lucifer as well. They compliment each other nicely. 

“Where is your mate?” Cas’s question is a good one, though, it is one he had hoped to avoid answering.

“She chose to remain in Colorado. She didn’t believe this was a good idea.” Michael can still feel the sting of her disappointment. 

“What does that mean for you when you go home?” Dean says it with a chuckle but there is a curiosity under his shining eyes. 

“It means that no matter how this turns out I will likely be sleeping in the garage for a long time.” Michael shrugs.

“You say that as though it doesn’t bother you.” Lucifer has always been too perceptive for his own good.

“It does. She’s my mate. But I have spent my whole life trying to meet the expectations of others. I sacrificed everything to be what they wanted me to be. This thing, this one thing, I’m doing for myself. No matter what the consequences.” It’s the right thing. Michael knows it as he sees his brother try to hide his smile.

They spend the next few days talking. Trying to make up for lost time. 

It’s a struggle. They were once so close and Michael is pained by the distance and the absence of a true bond between them. Lucifer never reaches out to touch his grace and since that first time Michael has not tried again. 

When he reaches to brush his hand along his brother’s feathers he is met with an absolute “No.” The rebuttal stings more than he can say. 

When he has to tell Lucifer that their parents have died it hurts more than he has words for that his brother refuses to be comforted by Michael. Instead sobbing out his grief into Castiel’s arms and wings as Sam drives frantically home from the Salvage Yard. He can hear him wailing from across the yard and Michael thinks that maybe this attempt at reconciliation was even more selfish than when he abandoned Lucifer in the first place. 

He is causing so much pain. 

He finds Dean in the garage. “How did you do it?”

“How did I do what?” Dean looks genuinely confused.

“Build a relationship with Sam when you come from such different backgrounds? How did you make it work?” Because Michael needs help, He wants this to work so badly.

“Dude, he’s my brother. You just keep trying.” Dean shrugs like this is no big deal. 

But it’s a huge deal. He wants his brother back so badly.

“What if you already gave up once?” Because Michael knows that’s the truth. He gave up on Lucifer once already. 

“Then you just gotta try a little harder this time. That and don’t quit.” Dean sounds so certain. “And Michael?”

“Yes?” Dean is looking at him so seriously.

“If you hurt him again we will find you, rip off your wings and burn what’s left of you. Dude, you better be serious, we sure are.” Michael has never thought of humans as threatening before. But he thinks he might be a little afraid of Dean Winchester. 

Michael watches with his chest tight as Cas comes to Dean for comfort after attempting to ease Lucifer’s pain. Dean wraps his arms and his soul around his mate; pulling him close and holding him as he chokes back sobs. Michael wonders how he could have ever agreed that humans and angels would make terrible mates. The love these two have for one another creates a bond so strong even Michael can feel it. He’s not even part of this family and he was wrong about so many things. 

Jesse looks up from dinner the night before they leave with a blush running up the side of his face. “Adam is kissing Meg.” 

All of the adults in the room stop and stare at him. 

“What’s Meg doing?” Michael is concerned. Meg is quite a bit stronger than Adam. 

“I don’t know. But I’m pretty sure Adam likes it. Gross!” Jesse looks disgusted. There is a flurry of activity while Cas tries his best to block the link between his two children. 

Michael snorts out a huff of laughter. He’s going to have fun teasing Meg about this on the way home. They all have a good chuckle until Adam comes in from the back yard flushed and rumpled. “What are you guys laughing at?” 

They erupt again and Adam rolls his eyes and heads off to eat in his room. 

Michael is leaning on the back porch that night when he turns to see Lucifer coming to stand beside him. 

“I would like to see you again,” Lucifer’s tone is neutral. But the comment is enough to make Michael want to take flight. 

“So would I. When would you like for us to return?” Michael’s staring at the yard, trying not to sound too excited or hopeful.

Be calm. Don’t make another mistake.

“How about Thanksgiving?” Lucifer smiles.

“I would love that.” Michael thinks that it’s just a month and a half away. 

He’s still smiling when he feels the first tentative brush of grace from his brother. He presses back into the connection gently, affectionately, and is rewarded with a sweep of Lucifer’s wings brushing his. They stand there in silence for a long while watching the night. 

“Does it bother you that I’m mated to a human?” Lucifer’s question is quiet. 

Michael thinks about his life and the mistakes that he has made. He thinks about his mate and how angry she is with him right now. He thinks about how much time he wasted on petty opinions and trivial matters. “No. Sam is good for you. He lightens your grace and brightens your smile. How could I be bothered by that?” 

Lucifer’s grace bumps his with more intent this time. There is happiness there. Michael shoves back with all the love and hope he carries for both of them. 

“I do have one question though.” When Lucifer turns to him Michael smiles. “How am I supposed to groom him?” He means it as a joke. Though bonding between angelic family members usually involves some form of feather grooming. 

“Pet his hair,” Lucifer responds. 

In hindsight Michael should have known he was being set up. Lucifer always did have a wicked sense of humor. Dean informs him of the prank war on the way to the airport. When Michael is horrified by what he has done to his brother in law Dean assures him Sam is not offended but that the pictures of him are priceless and will be framed. 

Michael spends the next month sleeping in the garage and plotting his revenge. Thanksgiving is right around the corner.


	17. Chapter 17

Part 17

Dean announces on a Thursday around the middle of October that tomorrow is date night. Cas cocks his head to the side and admires the way his mate directs the attention of the rest of their hodgepodge of a family. The boys will spend the evening with Lucifer and Sam and Dean and Cas get to go out. 

Cas feels a thrill of excitement run along his grace. It’s been a long time since he and his mate have taken time out for just themselves. He should have known with Dean that there was a grander plan than dinner and a movie. 

Date night turns out to be date day. Dean has arranged for them to have Friday off work. The kids go to school in the morning and it leaves them until Saturday afternoon to be together. 

“So what are we doing today?” Cas knows Dean well enough to be certain that if he has planned this much time for the two of them then they certainly have a schedule. 

Dean’s smile is warm “Well, I thought we could hit the coffee shop downtown for breakfast and work our way from there.” 

“What time do they stop serving breakfast?” Cas is slipping his hand up the back of Dean’s shirt. He trails his fingers along Dean’s spine.

“Ten o’clock. Why?” Dean’s voice is just the tiniest bit shaky. 

“I want you more than I want food right now.” That is pretty much always true for Cas. Dean doesn’t complain so Cas leads him to their bedroom by the belt loop on Dean’s pants while trailing kisses over his face all the way there. 

They manage to get to the coffee shop at nine forty five. Breakfast is pretty good. But not as good as Dean. 

“I was thinking we could go to the botanical garden today.” Dean’s not looking at him when he says it so he misses Cas’s mouth drop open. 

Pardon?

“You hate the botanical garden.” It’s true; strolling quietly through nature is not really Dean’s thing. 

“I don’t hate it. It doesn’t matter anyway. I want to do something you will enjoy today. Let’s go.” Dean’s voice is warm. His soul shines with happiness. Cas brushes his grace against Dean and is surrounded by his mates warmth. 

Cas can’t keep a plant alive to save his grace. Dean’s not much better. They finally agreed that the only reason the kids survive is that they tell them, loudly, when they need food. Anything that waits to be fed at the Winchester household will wilt and die of starvation. Just because he can’t keep them alive at home doesn’t mean Cas doesn’t love plants. The botanical garden is beautiful. There is something peaceful and freeing about being in a place so surrounded by growing, living things. 

“I love you,” Dean declares suddenly making Cas turn his head.

“I love you too, Dean.” He pulls Dean under the shade of a weeping willow and kisses him slowly again and again. 

Cas sighs out a long breath against Dean’s shoulder. “Ok. Let’s just get it out of the way now. Are you going to tell me something horrible and that’s why you’re buttering me up right now? If you are I would prefer you just go ahead and tell me.”

He’s not expecting the howl of laughter that comes out of Dean. His mate’s soul sparkles with mirth and Dean playfully shoves Cas. “Baby, what the hell? Nothing’s wrong; I’m not going to tell you anything terrible. I just love you and I wanted to spend the day with you. You’ve been looking droopy.” Dean gesturers at Cas’s wings. Cas hadn’t noticed it happening but he knows his wings droop when he’s stressed. Dean pets and strokes them while they stand there in the shade. 

“You just wanted to be with me.” Cas wraps his wings around Dean and holds him close.

“Always.” Dean responds leaving no room for doubt. His voice is sure; his tone loving. 

They have a picnic in the back yard for lunch. Spread out on a blanket in the sun with his head in Dean’s lap. Dean’s fingers brushing through his hair over and over. They’re surrounded by a feeling of lazy contentment. 

“Take a nap with me?” Cas asks softly. He isn’t sure what else Dean has planned but he’s tired and feeling relaxed and warm. 

“Sure thing babe. But we need to be up by three.” Dean’s tugging him up off the blanket and wrapping everything up to take inside. 

“What happens at three?” Cas cocks his head to the side and narrows his eyes suspiciously when Dean smirks. 

“It’s date night. We have to get ready,” Dean says it like Cas should know all this already. 

“Ready for what?” Cas says with a hint of exasperation. 

“You’ll see.” Dean’s dragging him back into the house after that. 

Cas wants to push the issue but he knows he can be too stubborn sometimes. Dean seems set on this course and maybe Cas can just let him take the lead today. 

That and I would rather nap than argue. 

Napping it turned out was a good choice. Cas falls asleep to the rhythmic breathing of his mate, snuggled in tight against him. He wakes up two hours later to warm wetness trailing along his back as Dean kisses and licks from one wing to the other;. Dean bites down on the joint next to his sensitive oil glands and swipes across them with his tongue. Cas stretches up and grips the headboard as he spreads his legs apart and feels Dean settle between them. Dean pets him, strokes him, slides inside him, and leaves Cas a puddle of relaxation and happiness when he is done. 

Best nap ever. 

Dean tells him to pack light. Cas is still trying to figure out why he is packing at all. He doesn't get any answers though, so he just rolls with the punches. They throw the bag in the back of the car and are driving downtown by four. It’s not until the pull up at valet parking in front of the nicest hotel in the city that Cas starts to really get wound up. 

“Dean, what are we doing here?”

“Checking in.” Dean responds nonchalantly. He sounds so deadpan Cas almost lets it go. He opens his mouth back up to ask another question Dean silences him with a slow kiss. “Cas, just relax and trust me to handle this, okay?”

They settle into the penthouse suite. It’s ridiculously large. But there’s champagne chilled and waiting, plus homemade cookies that are still warm. Cas would like to ask more questions, but he’s distracted by the suit Dean is putting on. 

Dean never wears a suit. 

The only time Cas has ever seen him in one was the day they adopted the boys. It’s hot. Seriously hot. He plays along and laughs as Dean rolls his eyes when he helps Cas drag on his much loved trench coat. Cas knows Dean hates it but that coat and Cas have been through a lot together. 

Dinner is at the five star hotel restaurant. They make it through the first course of something unpronounceable and frankly unpleasant before Cas looks over at Dean and suggests, “Milkshakes?” 

It’s all it takes to get them out of there. Diner food for the win. 

They wander around the hotel gardens with the shakes they got downtown. Dean hasn’t let go of Cas’s hand for most of the night and his grace is relaxed and glowing with happiness. There is a piece of metal art sculpture in the center of the garden. It’s impressive and beautiful. 

Cas thinks it looks a little bit like an angel in mid-flight but it’s vague enough that it’s open to opinion. He reaches out and runs his hands along the frame. He’s shocked by what he feels. 

“You made this,” he says in awe. Dean is blushing and looking off to the right away from him. “I can feel you in this. It’s beautiful.” Cas smiles and reaches his hand out touch his mate’s face. 

“It’s you,” Dean’s voice is so quiet Cas almost misses his response.

“Me? That is not me.” Cas looks up at the sculpture; at the impressive wing span and fluid form. 

“It’s what I see when you’re flying.” Dean wraps his arms around Cas and pulls him close. “The guy that owns the hotel had us rebuild the engine in his dad’s old car. While he was at the garage he saw the feather I was making for Sam and asked if I could make something for the hotel. We struck a deal and here we are. He gets the sculpture and we get some nights in the penthouse suite for free.” 

“My mate the artist,” Cas sounds a little awed. He wraps his grace around Dean’s soul and lets him feel how proud he is of him. 

“I’m just a mechanic, Cas. I’m good with junk,” Dean’s voice muffled from where he has buried his head in Cas’s neck.

“You’re not just anything.” Cas thinks of all the things this man is to him -- mate, friend, father to their children, partner, and lover. He looks at the sculpture and thinks about how far they have come together. He never expected to love like this. 

The penthouse suite has a huge bath and they spend part of the night soaking together, sipping champagne, and splashing each other until they have water everywhere. They move out to the bedroom when they are wrinkled and soggy. While they wait for Cas’s wings to dry out he give Dean a back massage that leaves him drooling on the hotel pillow. Dean’s soul is projecting happiness and relaxation. 

He loves having his wings oiled. From that first nervous grooming, Dean has always treated him as though he was something precious and cherished. Cas spreads his wings winder to give his mate more access. Dean’s really an expert at this by now and his fingers travel a well known path through Cas’s feathers. It’s not until Cas feels Dean’s fingers smoothing through his wings that he realizes how much stress he has been carrying. 

“I’ve been worried about you,” Dean whispers.

“Why? Nothing’s wrong.” Cas is confused. This whole day has been designed to relax him, to comfort him. He doesn’t understand why Dean is being so careful.

“Do you ever wonder about your family?” Dean’s voice is steady but his fingers stumble.

“You’re my family,” Cas says tensely. 

“You know what I mean, baby. When Michael came back -- it must have been hard for you.” Dean strokes down his wings trying to sooth away the tension that has returned.

“I don’t want to talk about this.” Please, Cas thinks, please don’t make me. 

“Cas, do you want to try and find them? If you wanted to I would help you. We all would,” Dean's’s voice is tight, nervous. He brushes his soul against Cas’s grace. 

Cas is overwhelmed with sorrow. 

“Dean, I held Lucifer while he sobbed out his grief over lost parents that he will never see again. Father forgive me, but I don’t want to find out it it’s the same for me. Or worse to find them and have to tell them that Gabriel is dead. What if they live and they don’t wish to reconcile? What if they rejected us?” His voice catches on the emotion of having to voice it. “Sometimes the dream is better, safer than the reality.”

Dean holds him close and presses kisses to his shoulders and neck. When he speaks again it’s softly whispered into Cas’s ear. “Sometimes you have to wake up, baby. You can’t dream forever.”

I know. 

“Why did you do all this today?” Cas is going to get an answer one way or another. 

“It’s our anniversary Cas. We had to celebrate it somehow,” Dean sounds amused; smug even. Cas shoves him off the edge of the bed with one wing. 

“Dean Winchester! This is not our anniversary!” Cas loves this human but he swears by all he holds holy he might just kill him for getting the date this wrong. 

Dean looks up from where Cas holds him pinned to the floor with his right wing. “It is too, Cas. This is the anniversary of the day I met you. The most important day of my life. I think it’s actually when I got a life.” 

“Four years ago today?” Cas asks stunned. It seems like such a brief flicker of time. 

He drags Dean bodily back onto the bed and kisses the know-it-all smirk off his face.   
They spend the night wrapped in each others arms discussing plans for Christmas and the trip to Orlando. They laugh and share kisses until they drift off to sleep. 

Dean brings him breakfast in bed the next morning. It’s fabulous; so is the sex that comes free with the meal. 

“We need to pick the boys up from Ellen’s at noon. I wonder what she is teaching them to cook this week?” Dean asks keeping his eyes on the road while he speaks. Cas turns to stare at him for a long moment.

“Dean you and I both know that she isn’t teaching them anything about cooking. They come home reeking of oil and gun powder every week. She’s teaching them how to operate firearms,” Cas sounds exasperated.

“I know, but it’s so nice having them out of the house every Saturday that I’m not going to say anything and neither are you.” Dean turns to him then with a wide smile, sunlight glinting off his eyes. 

“Good point.” Cas sits back in the passenger seat and soaks in the sun.


	18. Chapter 18

Part 18

Oh God. It’s EVERYWHERE.

Pumpkin, Pecan, Apple, Mincemeat, Lemon Meringue, Cherry Pie.

So help him; Dean loves pie. If pie was a full time job Dean would work overtime. He loves it. He wants it. It calls to him. 

“Dude, if you touch it Luc is going to kill you and I am too tired to hide your body before company comes,” Sam says it with a smile, but there is an undercurrent of cut your brother some slack. 

“Why is there so much of it?” Dean whines. He hears the childish tone of his own voice but after two full days of baking he just doesn’t care.

Sam chuckles “Michael’s coming with his family. Luc’s nervous and he cooks when he’s nervous.” 

Boy does he ever. They’ve filled up Sam and Luc’s house with food and therefore the deserts have ended up being held captive at Dean and Cas’s house. The group tried to talk Luc out of that idea, but he assured them that Dean and the boys would behave. Of course, he also threatened to kill them if they touched anything before dinner tonight. Dean doesn’t want to die. But the pies look so good. Maybe just a little taste…

Three hours later he’s still shaking his hand; remembering it going numb when Cas smacked it. 

Thanksgiving ends up being at their house. Sam and Luc’s house is just too small. So around noon people start trickling in. 

Bobby drops a case of beer in the kitchen and gives Ash and Chuck the look of death when they try to have one. Ellen stops in for hugs on her way to Jo’s house. Even that old bastard Zachariah brings over a bottle of wine and happily skips home with one of Lucifer’s pies.Jesse occupies his time by loudly counting the number of loops Luc is making around the coffee table. Adam is upstairs in his room doing some weird teenage boy ritual; something about seeing a girl I kissed two months ago and I need to look good. Dean’s trying hard not to think about that. 

Luc is pacing and as close to sweating as Dean has ever seen him waiting for Michael to show up. 

There’s enough food to feed a small army. Lucifer’s been planning this shindig for weeks. Everything is set up and ready to go. 

Cas leans over and whispers to Dean “If you drool any harder I’ll have to get you a bib.” He doesn’t flinch when Dean elbows him in the side. 

Michael, Meg, and Lilith show up at two. Awkwardness abounds. Luc has never met his sister in law and she stares blankly at Sam as though he is from another planet. Meg just pushes past them, gives Cas and Dean a hug, and plops herself down beside Jesse to watch the Ash and Chuck burp off that is occurring in the corner. Adam falls down the stairs in his attempt to look cool about ten minutes later. Meg greets him with a brief flap of wing and goes back to playing guitar hero. Dean chuckles at Adam’s look of confusion. 

Young love.

They finally get settled around the table and after perusing the dishes Lilith says “I’m sorry. I’m a vegan. I don’t eat meat or anything made with animal products.” 

It’s the choking gasp from Luc that gives Dean his first clue that this is all going horribly wrong. He looks around the table and gathers what the issue is. Turkey is a meat, stuffing made with meat products, mashed potatoes have milk in them, gravy is out, corn bread has eggs in it, so does the mac and cheese and the pies. 

Oh yay, more pie for me. 

Cas actually snorts out a laugh before he gets himself back under control. Sam is dragging Luc into the kitchen saying something about needing a paper bag. Dean stares after them in shock as the door slides shut behind them. Luc looked a little green. He starts to say something. What he doesn’t know. How do you tell your sister in law she can have the corn but that’s about it?

Michael looks at Lilith. She turns this really bright shade of pink before she leans over to him and says “How long do I have to wait until I tell him I was joking? I don’t understand this prank thing. Why is it fun to make your brother get upset?”

“Oh DUDE,” Dean’s howling out a laugh. “THIS is your get back for the hair petting thing?”

Michael has the decency to look uncomfortable “Yes,” he says “Am I getting it right?”

Dean forgets that pranking is not something that goes on in typically angel culture. To do something like this is height of rudeness. He’s ecstatic that Michael even tried it. But that he got his wife in on it is just the best thing ever. 

“Oh my God,” Dean chokes out “You are epic. Best prank ever. Luc’s going to die.”

Lilith jumps at his remark and shoots around the table and into the kitchen as fast as she can. Dean looks at Michael who shrugs and says “I think she’s worried you might be serious. It took me weeks to convince her this was a good idea.”

Dean’s got no idea what went on in the kitchen but Sam, Luc, and Lilith file back out in an orderly fashion about ten minutes later and all Luc says is “Who wants white meat?”

After that things relax a bit. Bobby and Michael actually hit it off as two business men go; discussing stock options and investments until later on in the evening. Lilith helps Sam clear the table and Dean’s happy to note that they chat easily while they do the dishes. 

“So you write journal articles on angel and human interactions?” Lilith sounds interested not just polite.

“Yeah, as our cultures co-mingle more and more I think someone should be studying at how we interact. As well as the potential difficulties and benefits such interaction might have.” Sam’s chirping on excitedly. He’s been nervous about getting along with Lilith.

“Indeed,” Lilith says “Lucifer sent Michael your latest article. It was enlightening. I do think perhaps you need to consider some more input from female angels in the future.” 

Sam stops washing the dishes and turns to look at her fully. “You read my article?” He questions in a wondering tone.

“Of course,” Lilith says like it’s nothing “You’re of our family. Your interests are important to us as well.” 

Dean gets distracted by Cas dragging him into the hallway for kisses after that but it seems like they’re going to get along. 

“You’re doing so good staying away from the pie. I’m going to have to reward you later,” Cas mutters to him in the darkened hallway. 

“Really?” Dean perks up at the thought. He loves pie but it’s no comparison to Cas. 

“Yes,” Cas breathes against his neck. “Luc made an extra cherry one just for us. The pie, a fork, and a can of that whipped topping you like are going to be waiting in our room for you tonight.” 

Dean’s brain stops working for what he later thinks might have been a full minute. 

“Why only one fork? Aren’t you going to eat any?” he chokes out.

“You can feed it to me. I’ll just lean back and focus on being your plate.” Cas flicks his tongue out over Dean’s ear when he says the word plate. Dean has to take deep breaths and think about oil filters to get himself under control. By the time he’s pretty sure his pants are safe Cas has walked off laughing. 

I love that man. 

There’s a brief scuffle after Ash and Chuck find out that Lilith is a publisher. That fucking stupid book of Chuck’s is the bane of Dean’s existence. How they talked Cas into letting them name one of the characters after him he will never know. It caused a big ruckus about three weeks ago because everyone knows that one of the main characters is based on Dean. 

He had turned to his husband in the middle of the disagreement and complained, “Now everyone who reads it is going to think our two characters are involved in some weird erotic off-screen love fest.” 

Cas had given him head cock number forty five and replied “Dean, we have our own erotic off screen love fest. We’re mates. Besides it’s a fictional story. None of it’s real. Why would I care about that?”

After that Dean realized that somewhere in there he had a point, but he had lost it and the fight. He was smart enough to not bring it back up again. 

It took them ten minutes of distracting to get Ash to leave Lilith alone. Bobby finally grabbed Chuck and dragged him out to the car and where Chuck goes Ash follows. 

“I’m going to have to thank Bobby later,” Dean comment as he watches them drive away.

“I sent him home with some of the leftovers, a pie and half, and a really nice bottle of scotch,” Luc says from behind him.

“Dude,” Dean replies “You’re awesome.”

“I know.” Luc grins and Dean follows him back into the house because a look like that says the angel has something planned. 

Oh thank you, it’s pie time. 

They gather around and Luc raises his hand for silence; his voice is gruff as he says “I just wanted to thank everyone for being a part of my family. It’s a joy to have you all here today. Now, who wants pumpkin?”

Michael raises his hand and says “I do.” 

Luc smiles; he puts his hand on the back of Michaels head and in one quick jerk buries his brother’s face in the pie. 

Lilith lets out a peel of laughter and Sam doubles over. Cas gasps to his left and both boys say “Oh my God!” 

Meg snorts and says “I want apple. But can mom get it for me?”

Michael wipes the side of his face off and glares over at his brother while he sticks his tongue out to taste the pie on his own face. “It needs whip cream.” He says.

Lucifer laughs and reaches for the spray can while everyone runs. 

They’re all piled up in the living room when Jesse says to no one in particular, “I’m thankful I can fly.”

“I’m thankful for my truck and that I don’t have to take algebra this year,” Adam responds.

Meg chimes in with, “I’m thankful I got accepted into the advanced flight classes for the spring.”

“I’m thankful for my husband and my children,” Cas sighs, he leans further back into Dean’s arms.

“I’m thankful for the health of my family,” Lilith says so softly while she looks at her mate.

Sam does bitch face number one hundred thirty nine or as Dean calls it the I’m a total woman and I want to cry like a girl but I won’t face before he says, “I’m thankful for the second chances that brought us all together.” Then he buries his face in his husband's shoulder.

“I’m thankful for pie,” Dean busts out with a smile. Upon the sharp elbow to his ribs he adds, “and for all of your love and company.”

“I’m thankful for the pleasant surprises that life brings if you hang on long enough,” Luc says it softly as he nuzzles his mate's face. 

They all turn to look at Michael who’s holding his wife’s hand and staring at his brother as he says, “I’m thankful that you’re alive and happy. I’m thankful that you wanted me to be here today. I’m thankful that I was lucky enough to not only find my brother but that you’re thriving. I’m thankful for your forgiving nature. I’m just thankful for you, Luc.” 

Dean looks at Sammy and watches as he squeezes his husband a little tighter. He feels the warm embrace of Cas’s grace and watches as Adam and Jesse engage in the age old game of lets see who can push who off the couch first. He thinks about the pie waiting for him tonight in his room and how lucky they all are to have each other. Dean feels himself tear up. So maybe Sam isn’t the only girl here. But you have to keep up appearances so just so we are all clear here.

Mostly Dean’s thankful for the pie.


	19. Chapter 19

Part 19

Bobby needs a new mechanic. It’s been apparent for weeks now. Luc and Cas have been working in tandem with Dean to try and convince Bobby that another person is a must have. They’re just too busy. Lucifer’s been booking appointments for two weeks out and regular customer emergencies have driven Ash and Chuck to take second shift. This gives them longer open hours but it still isn’t solving the problem. 

Luc knew they were reaching critical mass when he heard Cas telling Dean, “We’re going to Disney over Christmas. I don’t care if I have to burn the whole place down. We’ve been planning this for months. I love Bobby too, but he’s just going to have to cope. Make it happen, Dean.” 

Luc knows Dean’s invested in keeping his mate happy. Unhappy Cas is unpleasant for all of them. So Luc steps neatly around the Bobby issue all together, and adds some extra fuel to the fire. He’s good for that.

Lilith had been entranced by the feather Dean had made for Sam. When she had commented on it, Luc had driven them past the hotel on their way out of town to see the sculpture of Cas, Dean had created. She’s been talking to Luc about introducing Dean to some of her friends. Lilith is insistent that they would be big fans of Dean’s work. Luc knows Dean will be thrilled; but it adds complications. The first one being time. They have none of it with the Salvage Yard so busy. The second being space. Dean has no real workshop. He would need a designated space to create these requested art pieces. 

Well, he didn’t nickname me The Devil for nothing.

Luc has a few theories about how Bobby’s mind works. First of all, with the notable exception of Cas, none of them have been hired by responding to an add in the paper. They all just showed up and refused to leave. So following that train of thought Luc figures Bobby is waiting around to take in the next stray, even though he would never admit it. 

Luc just decides to keep his eye out. It turns out to be a good plan. On the way back from a tow job one night Ash and Chuck hit a snag. The truck just stops running. They’re proud little nerds and refuse to call for someone to tow the tow truck. Elbows deep in the engine trying to figure out what’s wrong they hear a voice say, “I think your water tank has sprung a leak.” 

Enter Pamela Barnes. Turns out she knows a lot about cars. Her dad was a mechanic, her brothers are mechanics, her ex-husband is a mechanic. Hell she’s a mechanic and she’s looking for work. Luc’s thrilled. 

Of course she’s blind. 

Yes, Luc is pretty sure it’s going to be hard to hide that from Bobby. But Lucifer has been around a while; he knows the difference between difficult and impossible.

“I don’t need to see the cars to know how they work,” she says with sass and a big smile. “Just point me to one and give me the make, model, and year.”

Luc can tell by the glow of her soul that she’s telling the truth. Pamela is confident; she’s in an arena where she knows she has control. 

Bobby’s not so sold on the idea. 

“You’re a bunch of idjits the whole lot of you,” he mutters. “I don’t care how good a mechanic she was. The woman is blind.”

“I heard that,” Pamela smirks as she links her arm through Dean’s and says “Show a lady a good time won’tcha?”

“Well it’s been a while,” Dean flirts with mock dramatics, “but I think I still remember how.”

Cas snorts back a chuckle as Dean take her off on a tour. Luc cocks his head in thought after he realizes Dean just went to show a blind lady around. 

Dean’s pretty smart. He’ll figure it out. 

It only takes a week. Pam is a great mechanic. Bobby forgets she’s blind half the time and keeps trying to send her out in the tow truck. It doesn’t hurt that she is a huge flirt either. Having two angels work at the garage was enough to cause a stir and get them attention, but two angels and a blind mechanic that seems to be psychic when it comes to what’s wrong with your car is priceless. Luc thinks their act is getting so good they could take it on the road. 

That solved issue number one at least. With the addition of Pam; Cas is free and clear for the family vacation. Now it’s just a matter of finding his brother’s mate a place to work on his art. But then maybe Pam isn’t the only psychic one working here.

“Tell him to set up his stuff in the garage next to the back entrance. It’s mostly empty anyway,” Bobby blurts it out over coffee to Luc one morning while they’re discussing bids from parts vendors. 

“You do realize that doing this means he will be working less hours here?” Luc asks because he’s not sure that they could get this lucky. 

“Luc, one day you and Sam will have kids and you’ll understand this better; but for now take my word for it. Dean couldn’t be any more my son if he had been born to me. I love him. I want him to be happy. So if banging out pipes from our scrap metal into artwork makes him happy then I’m happy. Besides, I could say no and you’d just set him up someplace where I might not get to see him everyday,” Bobby stares right at Luc as he says it. Luc tries not to flinch when Bobby mentions him and Sam having kids. It’s a bit of a tender topic; but he gets what Bobby means.

“He loves you very much you,” Luc states it firmly. Bobby just smiles in response and tells him to get out of his office. 

He’s walking across the yard to tell Cas the good news when he stumbles onto something he doesn’t think he will ever forget. Cas, Dean, and Pam crowded into a corner of the yard that’s mostly out of sight. Luc would have just kept going if not for the waves of discomfort pouring off his brother’s grace and the grim determination he senses in Dean’s soul. 

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Pam says. She sounds nervous her soul shining with excitement.

“Oh I mind,” is Cas’ stress filled response. “But it’s only fair. You can’t see them so you should get a chance to experience them at least once.”

Luc watches in fascination as Cas slowly tips out his left wing towards Pam. Dean guides her hands to his husband’s wing and once she has a hold of it slides his arms around Cas’ waist. Cas shivers for a moment in discomfort and Dean leans in and whispers, “I love you baby.”

Pam hesitates in her exploration of wing. She tips her head and asks, “Do you want me to stop? I don’t have to do this.” 

“No, it’s fine. It’s just personal and I’m very private,” Cas responds as he pats her arm. 

Luc walks over and catches Cas’ eyes from around Dean’s shoulder. He questions, “Are you all having a kinky threesome between the junked cars?”

Pam laughs and Cas chuckles. Dean gives Luc an irritated stare. His voice is rough when he answers, “Pam can’t see your wings so she asked if she could touch them once so she could get a feel for what they looked like. Cas volunteered.” 

Luc knows Pam gets a feel for her environment through touch. She had delighted him in playing along with a prank on Sam last week. Under the rouse of needing to be shown around the office she had managed to grab a handful of Sam’s ass repeatedly while he floundered and flushed trying to find a polite way to tell her to let go. Luc’s sides hurt all night. He figures he owes her one, so he prods her in the back with his right wing and says, “Here, grope me. I’m more fun.” 

The press of gratitude from Cas’ grace makes it more than worth it. His brother can be so sensitive. Luc’s grateful for a chance to make him feel safe. Dean’s smile is dazzling. 

He and Sam are in bed that night when Sam says, “So are you going to tell Dean you got him an art studio?”

Luc trails his fingers through his mate’s hair and sighs his contentment out before responding, “No. Bobby is going to offer to let him use the garage after Lilith calls tomorrow with the art requests.”

Sam pops his head up and gives Luc a long look before saying suspiciously, “You don’t want him to know you did this, do you?”

Luc shrugs, he’s uncomfortable with the scrutiny, “I don’t see how it matters.”

“It matters because you did all of this for him and then he’s never going to know,” Sam’s almost shouting. His has this are you stupid look on his face. 

Luc reaches up and rubs his fingertips over the tight line of his mate’s lips as he whispers, “Love, it doesn’t matter who gets the credit. Dean’s happy, you’re happy, Cas is happy, therefore I’m happy. What else matters?” 

He feels Sam’s soul wrap around him as his mate relaxes against his body as Sam mutters, “I love you so much. I just want you to feel appreciated.”

“Love isn’t about who starts it or who finishes it,” Luc replies, his voice filled with affection. “I don’t need recognition; I just need a happy family. Oh and you, I always need you.” He trails his hands down Sam’s back and rubs himself up against him. Sam melts into it. He always does, and Luc spends the rest of the night showing his mate how loved he is. 

Sam brings him breakfast in bed the next morning. As Luc is sipping his coffee and flipping through the paper Sam rubs his hand down Luc’s arm and says, “After Christmas I want to talk to you again about kids.” 

Luc knows his face must look shocked. He and Sam have discussed this several times and never came to an answer. It’s complicated. Both of them concerned about being turned away by either of their cultures. Luc is almost certain that based on his blemished grace no angel would agree to give them a fledgling. He’s just as concerned about being discriminated against when approaching a strictly human adoption. Sam’s just nervous about kids in general. They had agreed to drop the topic prior to Thanksgiving.

“Why now?” Luc asks.

Sam shifts and looks away as he answers, “Do you ever feel like there is something you’re supposed to do? I just feel like there is someone out there waiting for us. Someone, who maybe needs us. I don’t know. I just can’t shake it.” 

“Ok. That’s good enough for me,” Luc agrees. He reaches up to press his hand against his mate’s cheek and smiles when Sam nuzzles into the touch. 

“How is the search for Cas’s family going?” Sam questions.

Luc can feel his excitement and groans, “Not well. It’s frustrating. That, and I’m afraid Cas is going to kill us all.” 

“Oh he’s going to kill us. It’s just a matter of if we can find them before he does it,” Sam snorts. 

“Dean gave me everything he could as far as information from Cas’s trunk. But since he won’t actually let me look at anything in there it’s hard.” Luc huffs out in frustration, “I know he’s just protecting Cas’ trust but there’s got to be something in there I could use.”

Sam rubs the back of his head and pulls him in for a kiss. Whispering against Lucifer’s lips, “You’ll find them baby. Things just seem to have a way of falling into place for you.”

Where the Winchesters are concerned I guess you’re right.

Cas calls him from the Impala that afternoon describing in detail Dean’s happy dance at being allowed to turn the garage into an artist workshop. He says he actually teared up a bit when Bobby told him he was being demoted to part time so he could be a full time metal sculptor. Luc smiles at the thought of Dean so overcome with emotion. He wishes someone had taken pictures for blackmail purposes. 

He’s perched on their roof that night when Dean slides out of the attic to sit next to him. They spend a moment looking at the stars until Dean shivers and says, “Dude, its cold out here. Where’s your coat?” 

Luc laughs, “I left it at home momma Winchester.” 

Dean snorts “Get your ass inside before your feathers freeze up and drop off.”

They chuckle and when he rises to slip into the attic and walk down to say goodnight to Cas, Dean catches his arm. Lucifer turns to look at him with a question in his eyes.

“Thank you,” Dean says.

“For what?” Luc responds lightly.

“For the garage, for Pam, for the foot in the artist door you gave me,” Dean states it bluntly; his eyes never leaving Luc’s face. “Don’t even try to tell me you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Lucifer opens his mouth to deny it. But the deadly tight squeeze to his arm is enough to make him give up. He shrugs out, “You’re welcome.” 

He’s whistling his way across the backyard when his phone rings. “Hello,” he answers.

“Lucifer, its Zachariah. I found Castiel’s parents,” Zachariah speaks hurriedly.

Luc takes a deep breath before he says, “And?”

There’s a moment of silence. It’s not very long but it’s enough to crush Lucifer’s hope. Zachariah breaths out, “They’re dead. I’m so sorry.” 

He drops the phone in the grass as his grace rolls outward in grief. He feels the desperation and concern of Sam’s soul before he feels his mate’s arms surround him as he gasps out his tears; choking back the sobs sure to bring his sorrow to the attention of the rest of the family. Sam bodily hauls him into the house and pushes Lucifer onto the couch. 

Oh father. What do I do now?


	20. Chapter 20

Part 20

In the end, after so much debate about what to do, Cas walked into the living room at Sam and Luc’s house, took one look at his family and whispered, “What have you done?”

He gathers Lucifer up in his arms and holds the other angel as he cries out is sorrow and begs for forgiveness. 

He holds Sam’s hand as Sam chokes on his own tears. 

But he never meets Dean’s gaze and Cas never sheds a tear. 

Dean sends the kids to Ellen and Bobby’s then follows Cas back to the house. The only sensations he gets from Cas’ grace are anger and numbness. Cas walks to their bedroom and collapses on the bed. Dean goes with him; he just not sure what else to do. 

In the dark Cas asks, “Why did you do it? Why couldn’t you just let it be?” 

Dean doesn’t have an answer; in his mind there would be hugs and laughter and grandparents for his children. He never allowed himself to think they might not be there. That this might end badly. 

“I’m sorry,” Dean chokes out. 

It’s his tears that finally get a reaction from his mate. 

Cas growls out, “Don’t you dare cry. Don’t you dare make me comfort you too. This is all your fault. You should have let it be.”

Dean recoils; he stands up fleeing the room and digging through the kitchen for the car keys he just drops anywhere and can never find. He’s gasping and shaking and can barely see from the tears welling in his eyes. But he can’t find the fucking keys and he’s got to get out of here. 

He’s just going to have to walk. Dean turns to leave and Cas is standing in the doorway. His husband’s eyes are wide and he’s gasping like he’s run for miles. 

They stare at each other until Cas blurts out, “Don’t go. I’m so sorry. Please don’t leave me.” 

Dean reaches out and touches the side of Cas’ face. That’s all it takes to turn the angel’s gasps into sobs. 

Cas cries so loudly Dean knows Lucifer and Sam can hear him. But they keep their distance and Dean spends the night on the kitchen floor rocking his husband through the first moments of his grief. 

****

Dean Winchester’s had a lot of feelings about Zachariah; gratitude has never really been one of them, until today. 

Cas’ parents left a letter to Cas. Somehow through his investigation; Zachariah was able to get his hands on it. He showed up at the door with a black winged dude named Crowley to drop it off at dawn both of them looking disheveled; and Dean struggles to find a word other than cuddly. 

They don’t stay; Dean’s glad for that too. Humans tend to hover; death is a more personal thing for angels. They keep their distance unless asked to do otherwise. 

He slips back onto the couch in their living room and hands the elegant letter to Cas. His husband turns it over and over again; sliding his hands over the envelope and pressing it to his chest.

“What is it?” Dean whispers.

Cas presses back into him and chokes out, “There’s so much love in this. I can feel my mother.”

When Cas’ grace reaches out to his soul Dean feels grief and joy. He wonders for a very brief moment, what a mother’s love must feel like. He doesn’t remember his own. It hurts. 

Cas presses the letter into Dean’s hands and begs, “Read this to me? I can’t on my own right now.”

Dean takes it immediately; brushing his lips across Cas’ cheeks in the process. He’s relieved when Cas leans into his caress and pulls him back for a brief kiss before settling in more comfortably against Dean’s chest. 

“I love you,” Dean whispers.

“With all of my grace,” Cas responds.

The paper is crisp parchment. Nothing like the notebook paper Dean thinks a human would have written on; of course a human would have just sent an email. The handwriting is old style; calligraphy that’s immaculate and detailed. He thinks it’s beautiful and traces his fingers across the scrawled lines before he begins to read. 

“My Dearest Castiel, My heart aches for you knowing the conditions under which this letter will find its way into your hands. Your father is dying; his grace dimming as I write these words and I know with all my being that our time is drawing near. We did not have enough time together. Although, I suspect that everyone feels that way. I have so many regrets, Dear One. So many things to atone for, and no time in which to make amends properly. I’m so sorry we failed you so completely.” Dean has to take a deep breath; his voice is shaking and his chest is tight. 

Cas grips and twists his hands into Dean’s pants leg as he waits. He’s silent but Dean can feel the tears dripping onto his legs as his husband cries. 

He continues, “I hope that you know we only ever wanted the best for you and for Gabriel. But our drive to see you succeed pushed you to the brink and away from us. It took us far too long to understand that it was our actions that drove you both away. By the time we understood the pressure we had placed on you we could no longer locate either of you to try and rebuild our relationship. It’s my shame to have to admit to you that there were long years when we stopped looking. I will carry that regret through into the next place, my son. I should have searched for you without end. It seems that my faults with my children are endless.”

Cas sobs loudly in reaction to the words and shakes his head; turning to bury his face into Dean’s shirt. Dean threads his free hand into Cas’ hair and presses them more tightly together. 

“I have never forgiven myself for failing you,” Dean reads. “There were times when I thought your father and I disagreed so utterly that our bond would break and I would be truly alone. But with time he came to agree with me. My sweet Castiel; we know about your brother. When word came that an angel had been attacked and killed we searched until we discovered it was poor Gabriel. I’m so sorry that we weren’t there for you both; I’m so sorry that you were burdened with facing his loss on your own. I miss him so much. There is some comfort in thinking we may be together soon. It’s important to me that you understand you would not have been burdened to tell me of his loss.”

Dean scans the next part as Cas wipes his tears and chokes down some much needed water. What he reads makes his stomach clench and his head pound. Cas feels it. He turns to Dean and demands, “What it is? What are you reading?”

Dean wipes the tears rolling down his face away and mutters, “She knew, Cas. She knew.” 

He starts to read, “Your children are lovely, Castiel.” There is silence in the room and Dean looks up to see Cas’ mouth wide and red rimmed eyes wild. “Your human mate’s soul shines so brightly for you. You have truly been blessed. We found you a few months ago. The word of two angels at a salvage yard drew our interest and we hoped you had found a mate somehow. We should have known your life would be more complicated than that. You were never satisfied with what was expected. It was wonderful to witness your joy. It was the first time I left your father’s side in a decade. The trip was long but so worth it. There is so much love between you and this lovely family you have made for yourself here. So much safety and acceptance from so many people previously lost in the world. I have to think it was meant to be. That this was the life you were always supposed to live. I couldn’t bring myself to intrude.”

“She was right here,” Cas gasps. “Right here and she wouldn’t come for me.” 

Dean’s filled with a mixture of anger at Cas’ mother and relief that she had kept her distance. He’s ashamed to admit that on some level he still fears the loss of his husband. He reaches out and draws Cas back into his arms. They hold each other for a long time; Dean whispering over and over, “I love you.” 

Cas wraps his grace so tightly around Dean that Dean struggles to feel where he ends and Cas begins. There’s comfort in that feeling; that their bond is so strong.

“Is there more?” Cas asks.

Dean looks and replies, “One more paragraph. Do you want me to finish?”

Cas nods and Dean presses onward with, “I have no way to make amends for the sins we committed against you. I think perhaps neglect being the worst of them all. I pray to our father for your understanding and forgiveness. I pray for your safety and happiness. There is so much love here for you, my son. So much love that I will take with me in my final moments. I will bring it with me as I pass from this world and hope with all my grace that you will be able to feel it when you think of me. You are truly impressive; I am endlessly proud of your life and your choices. You’re so brave; your grace shines so brightly. I love you with all the grace that makes me.”

Dean feels the press of his husband’s grace burn through is soul and gasps. Cas is crying, tears streaking down his cheeks; but he’s smiling as well. Whatever is going on inside him must be powerful because Lucifer busts through the back door followed quickly by Sam and Cas throws his arms out to his chosen brother laughing as Luc’s wings wrap him up tight.

“She was proud of me,” Cas whispers. “She saw me, and knew me, and was proud of who I am.”

Luc chuckles through his own tears and replies, “Well of course she was,” as though he is totally unimpressed.

Cas beams at him and reaches out to hold onto Dean’s hand. 

Dean wonders how Luc always seems to know exactly what to say. 

He spends the next week in his shop making a frame for the letter. It hangs to this day on their living room wall; a reminder for anyone who takes the time to read it, that mistakes can always be corrected, forgiveness is possible, and love has no boundaries.


	21. Chapter 21

Part 21

They almost don’t make it to Florida. Dean gets to the airport and breaks out in a sweat; clinging to the back of the luggage carrier and focused blankly out of the window. 

“I’m not getting on that thing,” he whispers. 

Cas isn’t having any of it. He reaches over, grabs the bottom of Dean’s face and forces his mate to look him in the eye. “You can do this; we’ll be fine.”

Dean complies. Cas knows he’s frightened, can feel it rippling off his mate in waves. But they planned this knowing it would be the hardest part for Dean, and Cas had promised him he would not allow Dean to embarrass himself in front of everyone. The angel threads his fingers through his mate’s clenched hand and pours as much reassurance into their bond as he can. Dean’s soul brightens and his grip relaxes. 

“Thank you babe,” he whispers.

Cas smiles and presses a kiss to the side of Dean’s face, “Anytime.”

He’s grateful they can afford first class. The more comfortable setting and smaller amount of people helps to ease Dean’s frazzled nerves. There are so many of them going they fill up the first class cabin. So it’s just family there to watch as Dean struggles to control what he knows is an entirely irrational fear.

Cas’ parents left him everything. It was that money that paid for the seat upgrade. The trip to the home he grew up in was painful and raw. If it hadn’t been for his bond with Dean and Lucifer’s solid presence Cas is certain he would have not been able to stand it. 

Zachariah had been wonderful. Cas was shocked at the time. The older angel had arranged for the trip, dealt with the public, worked out the details of shipping some items home and selling others. Whatever Cas had needed it was there as if by magic. 

He’s not sure if that was because of Zachariah himself or his newly bonded mate, Crowley. There was a lifetime of history between those two and for all their constant bickering they were a good match. Crowley’s relationship with Lucifer being the exact opposite of the one he shared with Zachariah; no tension or strain just gentle teasing and genuine affection. 

Crowley and Zachariah agreed to stay behind and finish the details of selling the property and settling accounts. Cas, Dean and Lucifer returned home long enough to pack and head for their hard fought for vacation. 

Dean holds Cas’ hand for the entire flight. Cas looks around to see his two children zoned out on their mp3 players; Lucifer and Sam curled together and nuzzling, the joy from Lucifer’s bond shining through his grace. Cas thinks his mother was right; there’s so much love here. 

He’s eternally grateful for the clear skies and lack of turbulence. 

Dean’s green by the time they reach the suite assigned to the family but a few wing strokes from the angels and a gentle shove from Sam, and the last of his tension eases away. 

Jesse started talking as soon as the plane landed and has yet to be able to get control of himself. “So we should start at Epcot and I want to ride Space Mountain and then we should go to the safari park and look at animals; did you know the tree there is fake? I saw that on the TV. Let’s ride every ride out there and we should see Cinderella’s castle. I know Adam says it’s for girls but I don’t care, you should at least go look at it once. They have special seats for us so we can stretch our wings isn’t that awesome. Do you think we can ride together? What if they seats are far apart. I don’t want to go on the ride by myself and Uncle Luc picks on me too much to want to sit by him all the time.”

Dean chuckles and Cas tries to sooth Jesse’s excitement with his grace. It’s a wasted effort on his part. It’s like they fed the child nothing but sugar for the last year.

Adam stares at his brother for a long moment and says, “Dude,” in a voice filled with awe “you gotta breath.”

Jesse gives an eye roll that he certainly did not learn from Cas. He doesn’t care what Dean says he simply doesn’t do that; it’s immature.

Dean gives him a look that says he knows exactly what Cas is thinking and Cas reacts without thinking rolling his eyes up to the ceiling. Dean howls with laughter and Cas playfully slaps at him with his wings. 

He catches a spike of something flavored like jealously from Lucifer; quickly smothered by the other angel. Cas turns and his chosen brother looks shamefaced and brushes against Cas’ grace with his own in apology. Cas is confused; this is a topic he plans to pursue later when they have some time alone. 

Dinner is fabulous and the parade is awesome. Sam and Dean running off after the boys like they are children themselves, is a reminder for Cas of how much his tender hearted mate has missed out on in his lifetime. Dean’s never been here before either. Cas laughs as Dean and Sam chase and trip each other in the wide streets of the park before Dean jumps up grabbing Sam’s head and pulling him down for what Cas thinks is referred to by humans as a noogie.

“Don’t you ever try that with me,” Lucifer drawls beside him. 

“Assuming this is an equal agreement and I am also exempt from being on the receiving end of such behavior you have a deal,” is Cas’ smirked reply.

Lucifer brushes his wing against Cas’ as he whispers out, “I’m sorry for earlier. I was caught up in the moment and my feelings got away from me.”

“Are you alright?” Cas asks.

Luc shakes out his wings and shakes his head, “Now is not the time for you to be worried about me.”

Cas snorts, “You’re my family, more so even than if we were blood; your concerns are my concerns.”

There is a pause and Cas feels a warm affectionate brush of admiration and gratitude coming from the other angel. He pities humans, so much communication is lost when you can’t feel what the ones close to you are feeling. 

Lucifer drops onto a park bench and Cas slides in close his presence offering comfort. It’s not something they do often having spent so much time among space-aware human beings; but angels have little concept of personal space when it comes to those they love. Lucifer is distressed and were they not in public Cas would be grooming him. 

“Sam wants to talk about children again when we return home,” Lucifer comments and Cas immediately sees the issue.

“You need to get over yourself,” is his quick and blunt reply.

Lucifer huffs with laughter. “No, no, give it to me straight,” he jokes.

Cas flaps out his wing and plucks at a displaced feather as he responds, “This fear you have because of what you see as damage to your grace is ridiculous. There’s nothing wrong with you, Luc. You shine so brightly and the only one who doesn’t see that is you. Time to let it go now; and I know I’m a hypocrite because I hold on to everything and worry all the time but adding to our family is a beautiful thing. It something I want you to have.”

They blink at each other for a moment and any further conversation on the topic is put on hold as two soaking wet Winchesters collapse at their feet. 

“Uncle Sam and Pop fell in the water,” Adam announces as he drags an over stimulated Jesse behind him. 

Cas looks down at his dripping, grinning mate. “Are you both trying to get us kicked out of the most magical place on Earth?” he asks.

Sam flushes pink with embarrassment. “You don’t think we caused any trouble do you?” he questions, concerned. 

Dean shrugs, “Dude, with as much money as were dumping here they should have let us stay in the castle; fuck them.”

“Watch your mouth,” is all Cas gets out before Dean reaches up and drags him down into a disgustingly damp embrace and smothers him with kisses. 

He laughs; and then laughs harder when he hears Adam mutter, “Oh for the love of God, get up; you’re embarrassing me.”

*****

Cas is absolutely not doing this. 

He’s just not; it’s not going to happen.

He’s managed to avoid it for the entire trip until now. Dean’s determined and Lucifer can’t cover for him anymore. They’re going to ride Mission Space and Dean insists Cas has to come too. He can’t put it off any longer; Cas turns to Dean as he is getting strapped in and blurts, “I can’t do this! I’m terrified of roller coasters.” 

His mate smirks before responding, “I know. But think of the safety record and limited amount of accidents. Statistically you’re safer on a roller coaster than almost anywhere else. In fact, it’s probably safer than oh, I don’t know, FLYING.”

Cas feels his grace recoil in shock and responds, “You JERK, you knew I was stalling.”

Dean chuckles, “You’re just mad because you used the same argument with me about flying. Not so much fun when it’s pointed back at you is it?”

Cas is pretty sure later he will agree with that but now he’s too terrified. 

The belts are strapped the announcement sounds and Dean threads his fingers through Cas’ hand squeezing tightly, “You can do this,” Dean says “We’ll be fine.”

Cas blinks his eyes open and Dean smiles. Right before the car rolls out he responds, “I love you, but so help me when this is over I’m going to get you I swear.”

He thinks he hears Dean laughing. It’s hard to tell over the sound of whoever is screaming so loudly on the first plunge downward. 

When he complains about it later Dean chokes on his lunch and Lucifer snorts soda up his nose. While the angel is doubled over coughing Sam touches Cas gently on the arm and says, “Dude, that was you.”


	22. Chapter 22

Part 22

Dean’s made it home a day early from a whirlwind meeting with Lilith and some investors that want him to create some work for a hotel chain they own. Dean’s got to hand it to Lucifer’s sister-in-law. She is one hell of an agent and so blood thirsty when it comes down to money that you could swear she’s a vampire. They knock out a deal that’s good for everyone and hell, it’s GREAT for Dean. He’s on his way home to sketch with a day off before having to head back to the salvage yard. 

It’s a nod to his level of domestic bliss that he decides to spend his rare, solitary day off cleaning his house and doing laundry. Dean hates laundry, Cas often tells him he is epic fail when it comes down to it. Truth be told, Dean can barely get the dirty clothes he takes off into the basket much less to the washing machine. Having things dried and folded by dinner is a sure bet that he’s going to get laid tonight. 

The knock on the door isn’t as shocking as the fact that Zachariah is standing on the other side of it as soon as Dean opens it. 

“Dude, what are you doing here?” Dean’s surprised; Zachariah doesn’t stop by without calling first. His relationship with the angel has evolved over time. No longer an outsider, Zachariah and his new mate Crowley, are now members of Dean’s extended family. 

“I’m sorry, Dean. This isn’t a social call.” The angel sounds stressed.

Dean moves to the side and allows Zachariah to come fully into the house. As they settle in the kitchen with coffee Dean finally mutters, “Okay, spill it.”

There is a smirk and then Zachariah says, “We were contact by a social services agency from another state. Adam’s mother has become involved in services with them. There is a child, a little girl who is Adam’s half sister. She’s been removed from her mother’s care and needs placement and adoption. They were hoping you and Cas would be interested since you have her older sibling.”

That was totally not what Dean thought he would hear this morning. He blinks and Zachariah smiles as he says, “I’ll wait for you to call the rest of the family.”

It takes a half an hour to haul everyone home. Dean doesn’t call an emergency meeting for nothing, when the call went out people came as fast as they could. 

Adam’s reaction is extreme and expected. “I’ll just move out. I’m almost eighteen. I can go live at Sam and Luc’s house, or I can share a room with Jesse. We’ll take her. Of course we will. When can we get her? What do we have to do?”

Dean has to only look at his son to know how anxious he is. He can feel the pull of Jesse and Cas trying to sooth Adam through their bond. The house is too small, and Dean and Cas had never counted on having two kids much less three. But family is family; he’s not going to let that little girl grow up in foster care. 

Bless his little brother though; Sam’s already beat him to the punch. 

Sam turns to Luc and chuckles as he says, “I guess we never have to have that talk about kids now.”

Luc’s smile is blinding. 

“Adam, Can we talk to you?” the angel asks. 

Dean is never really sure what gets said to his son in the other room, but when the three of them come back Adam’s face is wet and Sam is choking it back for all he is worth. 

“We’ll take her,” Sam announces. “Lucifer and I; we’ve been talking about this for a long time. If that would be ok, we’d be happy to have her.”

It’s a remarkably fast process. Sam and Luc have already had the parenting training since everyone participated when Cas and Dean adopted Jesse and Adam. Less than two weeks later Sam’s office is a bedroom and a woman named Missouri from the Department of Social Services arrives at the house with the tiny, blond haired, three year old girl named Tara. 

Tara looks at Luc and whispers, “You a real angel?” 

Luc kneels down and holds out his hand, “Yes I am. Who’s your friend?” 

Tara holds out a dirty stuffed lamb that appears to be dressed in a trench coat. “This is Rufus.” 

Lucifer pats the odd little sheep on the top of its head and comments, “He appears to be a very nice sheep.” 

Tara beams and holds his hand for the rest of the trip around the house. 

Adam has been a mess since he found out. He’s gone back and forth between angry at his mother for having another child to feeling guilty for thinking that, to being angry at his mother for not taking care of his sister, to being scared that she won’t like him. 

Dean’s pretty sure it was all a lot of wasted energy. Tara is fascinated by him the minute they meet, and for the rest of her first day as a Winchester she refuses to let her older brother out of her sight. Adam beams with brotherly pride and Dean remembers that same feeling the first time he saw Sammy after so many long years. 

When he meets his brother’s eyes from across the room Dean can tell Sam is thinking the same thing. 

“All grown up now,” Dean teases as he sits down next to Sam on the porch watching the three kids playing in the yard.

Sam snorts, “Yeah, can you believe it? I’m someone’s dad.”

“You’re gonna be great,” Dean offers, he remembers feeling so over his head when the boys came home. 

“Thanks,” Sam leans back on his long ass arms and laughs as Jesse trips Adam for the sole purpose of flopping down on top of him and rolling him into the dirt. 

Lucifer’s managed to wrestle the girl away from her sheep and he’s got it washed and in the dryer. Dean overhears Cas mutter something to which the other angel responds loudly, “I am NOT ironing a tiny sheep trench coat. She won’t care if it’s wrinkled.”

But Dean knows he’s probably going to get the iron right now. Lucifer is a very doting mother. 

He curls into bed with Cas that night wrapped up in cool sheets and warm wings. He sighs as his husband runs his fingers through his hair and grunts as Cas points out the few grey hairs Dean’s growing. 

“There’s one thing I don’t get,” Cas wonders.

“What?” Dean asks only really halfway paying attention.

“Why does the sheep have a trench coat?” and Cas sounds like he’s been wondering about this for a while.

Dean snorts, “I don’t know babe. But he kind of reminds me of you.”


	23. Chapter 23

Part 23

“Is my tie straight?”

Jesse rolls his eyes, “Adam, if you ask me that one more time I’m going to punch you in the face.”

Cas chuckles at his children as he wanders into his bedroom to get dressed. Dean’s in the mirror checking out his suit and Cas takes a moment to admire the lines of his mate’s body before Dean turns and asks, “Is my tie straight?” Cas snorts his amusement but makes amends by giving Dean a through once over. 

“You look wonderful,” the angel comments and Dean grins. 

“Better get dressed babe,” his mate responds. “We’re going to be late and Adam will think the world is ending.”

As if on cue from the living room is a shouted “HURRY UP!” 

At Dean’s look of frustration Cas shakes his head and comments, “No, you cannot kill him. We’ve put too much work into him. Besides one more summer and he’s moving out. We’ll miss him when he goes.”

It’s the truth too. Today is a big day for the Winchester clan. Adam is graduating from high school. At eighteen and with an acceptance letter to his college of choice, Cas’ son is feeling excited and from the tell in the bond they share he’s also very nervous. Dean on the other hand is a mess. Cas presses his grace against his mate’s soul offering support and soothing his worry. Adam is growing up and there is nothing to be done about it.

Though growing up is an iffy term around here. Cas throws his suit on as fast as he can only to rush down the steps and find his oldest son hanging his younger brother up by the legs. Cas shakes his head and then slaps both the boys up the back of their heads with his wings. 

“Get in the car please,” he orders. And only starts grinning when he’s facing the other way so they can’t see.

They ceremony is long and horribly boring. Cas has to stomp on Dean and Jesse’s feet several times to keep them awake. He’s gratified to see Sam giving Lucifer the horrible bitch face of death-walking as the other angel drops off for the third time. Tara is the highlight of the whole process. When Adam crosses the stage she points and screams in a voice that would do a grown man proud, “THAT’S MY BROTHER!” 

Jesse is mortified as the whole coliseum turns to look at them. He groans even harder as Lucifer joins in as Cas raises his wings to wave. 

“I hate this whole family,” he’s still muttering to himself on the way back to the car. 

Tara offers him her sheep for comfort and though Jesse will never admit to it he cuddles the thing the whole way home. 

****

Cas is often shocked how often in life you think you’re ready for something and then find out you’re not. 

Carrying his son’s belongings out of the house at the end of the summer is painful blow. Cas has checked and rechecked the list probably one hundred times; so many in fact that Luc took great pleasure in ripping it from his fingers and setting fire to it at one point. 

It was alright; Cas had extra copies. 

“I’m only going two hours away,” Adam comments as they pile together on the floor of the living room for one more family movie night before he leaves. “I’ll be home like every other weekend.” 

Dean catches Cas’ eye over their children’s heads and winks. They’ve had this talk. Adam is going to hit school and never look back. Dean’s betting they will have to threaten him to get him to come home for Christmas. Jesse is another story all together. They both suspect he will live with them until he turns forty. When they tease him about it the younger halfling just shrugs and asks, “Would that be bad?”

Traffic is hell and the dorm is hotter than three suns after being closed up all summer. But Adam is glowing with excitement and almost throwing them out as soon as they get the room set up. The parents and other children on the campus almost stumbling over themselves as they stop and stare at the odd picture Cas knows his family makes to everyone else. He puffs up his wings bigger and pointedly ignores Dean’s chuckle. 

Sometimes people are idiots. 

Adam finally gets home sick halfway through the semester. He calls and moans about his classes and how annoying his roommate is. Cas is certain that he’s leaving out a large amount of his college experiences but they do try and give him as much privacy as they can. He makes it home for Thanksgiving even bringing the hated roommate home too. The boy is an art major and Cas is fascinated at the name Dean has made for himself as the kid knows his work. 

They curl together in bed one night before Christmas and Cas grins as Dean informs him that Adam is indeed coming home for a visit but that he’s also asking to bring a date. 

“Can you believe it?” Dean laughs. “It’s a girl too!”

Cas sighs in pleasure as his mate runs his nails down between his wings and pulls him in closer for kisses. His grace flows between them and he gasps as he feels the press of Dean’s arousal through their bond. Cas had once thought that time changed passion into something more like comfortable familiarity. He’s thrilled to know he’s wrong. Dean just gets better and Cas just more attracted to him every passing minute. 

****

Tara is joy to have in the family. She is funny and spastic and loud. Nothing like the frightened little girl they all thought they were adopting. Sam and Luc are always on the run. She is into everything and has an excuse for every action she takes. 

Dean’s had to excuse himself from many a family discussion of her behavior to laugh at it out on the back porch. 

She flushed everything in the house that would fit down the toilet; she shaved the neighbor’s cat; she poured syrup over Jesse’s wings while he slept on the couch one day. But by far the worst had been when she got angry at Sam for not buying her a toy at the store one day and started yelling at the top of her very powerful lungs that he was not her daddy and that she didn’t want go with him. They called security and the police and finally Lucifer had to go downtown and assure the authorities that yes Sam was his husband and yes his daughter was evil incarnate. 

Lucifer drops down beside them one evening looking at the stars and shakes his head, “I just don’t know where she gets this stuff from.”

Sam snorts from the doorway and Dean and Cas share a look. 

“Dropped me face first in the mud,” Dean offers.

“Threw my son off a roof,” Cas adds.

Everyone looks to Sam who mutters darkly, “Replaced all my research with porn while I was on a business trip.”

They turn to Lucifer who blinks at them innocently before replying, “So you’re saying she gets it from me?”


	24. Chapter 24

Part 24

Years later they still refer to that Christmas as the apocalypse. Jesse in particular will take joy well into his adult years in harassing his older brother for bringing home a girlfriend and a roommate and leaving with a boyfriend and a seriously pissed off ex. 

They all liked Max better anyway, even if the guy was a little weird. 

Adam was a sweetheart; so much like Dean under all of his tough exterior. Max Miller is a very odd guy. But Adam was clear the kid made a good roommate. He was clean and quiet and kept his shit on his side of the room. No one was ever dropping by at odd hours and, he was never passed out over the toilet drunk. Things were good. 

He had a total lack of social skills but Adam shrugged it off at Thanksgiving by saying, “And which member of this family wins a medal for that?” He had a point and they let it go. 

Max never went home for the weekends and no one ever came to visit. When Adam asked to bring his girlfriend home for the holiday Dean and Cas had been pleased but when he called back asking them to add another plate they wondered. Something about the way Max carried himself reminded Dean of some of the kids he grew up with in foster care. Bobby phrased it best when he commented, “Kid reminds me of Chuck.” It was the truth too. 

Stacy was another whole thing all together. She breezed in the door when they rolled in for the holiday waving and laughing through the introductions like she had rehearsed them the whole way. Dean wasn’t used to seeing his son so ill at ease and Adam was clearly nervous. Dinner was fine and they watched as Adam curled up on the couch that night with her. Dean trying not to be annoyed by the incessant texting she was doing. 

When he and Cas crawled into their bed that night Dean rolls over and mutters into his husbands feathers, “I don’t like her.”

Cas chuckles, “You wouldn’t like anyone the kids bring home.”

Maybe that’s true. 

“That’s not my point,” Dean grumps. 

“Then what is your point love?” Cas rolls over to nuzzle into Dean’s arms. 

He thinks about it for a while. “Okay, so I don’t have a point!”

He ignores Cas as the angel laughs. 

“You should worry less about Stacy and more about Max,” Cas suggests and the comment peaks Dean’s interest. “Why?”

The angel smiles, “Something about the way he looks at Adam reminds me of the way I think I used to look at you before you were mine.”

Well if that’s true then Dean figures it can’t really be a bad thing. 

Dean can be a real idiot sometimes.

Stacy hates Max and when everything is over it’s pretty clear that she must have had some idea that Max liked Adam a little more than he was supposed to. She ignores him, refuses to spend time with him and berates Adam for trying to split his time to give them both some attention. 

“What do you want me to do?” he shouts late one night on the back porch. “You can’t stand to be around him and then you get pissed at me when I go do something without you. Make up your mind.”

Sam and Luc share a look as they watch from their own house; trouble brewing on the horizon. Of course Tara is always more than willing to help trouble along. Over breakfast two days later she looks up from her corn flakes and blurts to Stacy in front of the whole family, “I don’t like you. You’re mean and you lie.” In the stunned silence that follows she turns to Adam and says, “You could do better. I vote for Max.” 

Stacy slams down her coffee and storms out with Adam hot on her tail. Lucifer’s wings jerk in restrained laughter behind the newspaper and Dean grins to himself as he watches Max blush before a shy smile lights up the kid’s face. Dean decides smiling looks good on him. 

It’s a long time before Stacy and Adam come back and she still glares at Max like it’s all his fault. 

Adam collapses on the bed in his parents’ room and turns to Dean saying, “She’s not a bad person I swear. She’s just really jealous.”

At Dean’s raised eyebrow Adam yells, “What!?”

Dean shrugs and sighs before he answers, “Look, far be it from me to tell you how to have a relationship. But I do know one thing that I’m willing to pass on. When you’re with someone you have to be realistic about their strengths and their flaws. Once you can really see them then you need to decide if their flaws are the flaws you want to live with. Everyone has flaws Adam; just not everyone has flaws you want to tolerate.”

“So dad has flaws that you like?” Adam asks and Dean smiles. 

“Cas molts and leaves his feathers everywhere, he has terrible morning breath and can’t utter two words together in a sentence until he has had half a pot of coffee. He has a rigid sense of decorum and expects everyone else to do the same; a wicked temper and he’s possessive as hell.” Dean laughs. “Do I like his flaws? Hell no. I doubt he likes mine either. But I can live with them. Because living with them means I get to keep him with me.”

“So the trade off is worth it?” Adam ponders. 

Dean nods. “It is for me.”

It’s later that night when Cas sneaks up behind him whispering, “What are you doing?”

Dean leans back from his hidden perch at the top of the stairs, “Trying to see if we raised the kid to have any sense at all.” 

Cas squeezes in next to him and both of them peer over the banister into the living room where Adam and Max are leaning against the couch looking at the Christmas tree. 

“Do you believe my little sister told me to vote for you?” Adam laughs. “I thought Stacy was going to die.”

Max shrugs but doesn’t comment, trying to stay focused on the package he’s wrapping instead. 

Adam continues with, “I mean, it’s not a contest. You’re my best friend. She acts like you want to date me or something.”

Dean hears Cas inhale lightly beside him and smirks. Cas can tell where this is going and so can Dean. In fact he’s pretty sure poor Max has just reached his limit. 

Max mutters, “No, it’s not a contest. You should have picked me though. I would take way better care of you than she will.” As he pushes the package up under the tree he turns to look Adam in the eye. 

“Max?” The unspoken questions lay heavy in the air between them and Dean feels Cas reach over to take his hand and squeeze it hard with anticipation. 

Max shrugs, “I like you more than I should. You’re easy to be with and passionate and warm. I don’t feel like I feel with you around anyone else. I know that’s all going to change now and you’re going to want me to move out of your room and that’s fine. But you’re driving me nuts with her and I can’t stand being around it anymore anyway. For the record though, you really should have picked me.”

He starts to get up and Adam grabs his hand. “That’s not fair,” Adam whispers “I didn’t even know you were an option.” 

He tugs on Max’s hand and the other boy slides closer muttering weakly, “What about Stacy?”

Adam grins, “She’s staying at Sam and Luc’s and flying home tomorrow. We broke up. Turns out I wasn’t really interested in her flaws.”

Dean gets enough of a last look to know that Max is confused but leaning in while Adam pulls him closer before Jesse erupts from behind them, “Jesus Adam get a freaking room!” 

Everyone jumps and Adam turns to look up at them. When he sees both his parents and his brother packed on the steps he flushes and moans, “I hate this family so much sometimes!” 

It’s the first time they ever hear Max laugh. 

Dean yanks Cas back to their room where they shut the door and high five before breaking into the Snoopy dance. 

Falling into bed together Cas presses tender kisses to Dean’s face and neck as Dean grooms him gently. 

“Well,” Cas whispers, “If that works out then no grand kids for us on Adam’s side.”

Dean snickers into his husband’s shoulder before gasping out, “There’s still hope for Jesse.”

Cas groans loudly, “We’re DOOMED,” before flopping off Dean to curl into his side. 

“I know,” Dean answers. “But I still like Max better.”


	25. Chapter 25

Part 25

At the end of the day it’s the little things that matter. The tiniest of smiles from the people you share your life with. The gift of a sunny day with the wind warm against your wings. It’s finding yourself and finding happiness with another person and binding them to your soul so you can stay with them always. 

That’s something Cas will never regret. Not even as the days close in and time draws short. 

Dean’s lived a good life. A long life thanks to power of his soul being bound to Cas’ grace. But all things end in good time and Dean’s time is running out. 

“Are you scared?” Tara whispers to him as they stand vigil in the doorway as Jesse says his tear filled goodbyes. 

“No,” Cas answers with a smile as he tugs her in close for hug. “I’ve never been afraid of this as long as where he goes I get to follow.”

Cas wonders at the beautiful woman that troublesome little girl has grown into. So many years have gone by and Tara is tall and strong and independent. She has Lucifer’s spirit and Sam’s quiet determination. He can’t think of better hands to leave his son in. 

“You’ll take care of him?” Cas questions motioning to Jesse now wiping away his grief and walking towards them. 

Tara’s face lights up as her husband draws closer. “Always,” she comments and Cas knows it’s the truth. Say what you will about Jesse; the boy had good taste. 

No one had seen it coming. It had been a secret that his younger son had sat on for year after year. He’d gone to college and grown into an impressive man with broad wings and a broader smile. But there had never been anyone serious, anyone he brought home. They had started to worry until Tara turned twenty one and Jesse had dragged her in under the mistletoe for kisses and an offer to stay with her always. Neither of them had ever looked back and Cas didn’t think he had ever seen Adam look so pleased. 

Jesse hesitates before he reaches them both and Cas watches as the tears again start to fall. “How am I supposed to stand here and say goodbye to you too?” he gasps and Cas pulls him in and holds his son tightly until the halfling cries himself out. “It’s not goodbye Jesse, I’m just changing my address,” Cas jokes and is relieved when he sees the trembling smile cross his son’s face. 

“I’m so proud of you and I love you so much,” Cas whispers to him and then shakes out his wings as Tara pulls Jesse gently away. 

Adam is inconsolable in the living room, so much like Dean that he has to rage against it all the way until the end. Cas shares a look with Max as he watches him hold Adam tightly and offer him comfort. There’s always been so much strength between those two; a solid foundation for two lost boys who have grown to become amazing men. Cas hears their children laughing and looks out the window to watch as his great -grandsons dart back and forth in the yard. They were all shocked when Adam and Max had brought home Vivian and Miranda. Their two girls are now in their thirties with small children of their own. 

He and Dean made a family, a large one, full of laughter and love and grace. If there is nothing else he takes with him from this world Cas hopes he takes that. They have both always been so proud of the little bit of the world they carved out for themselves. 

Sam and Lucifer wait for him by the bed. Sam with is white hair and wrinkled face smiling as Cas draws closer. 

“You’ve taken care of everything?” Cas asks and feels himself relax as Lucifer answers, “Of course, what else did you expect?”

And this is how it will be then, snark until the very end. 

He brushes his grace against the other angel’s and is overwhelmed by the affection and happiness he feels in response. At Cas’ odd look Lucifer smiles and says, “What? You expected a tear filled overly emotional goodbye? I’m not human you idiot. I know your just shaking off the shell to go on to something better. When you get there tell your lazy husband I’ll see him soon.” They embrace and Lucifer whispers to him softly, “I’ve handled it all. They will want for nothing; I’ll make certain of it.” 

With one last brush of wing the angel slips away to the door and Cas is enveloped by Gigantor who seems intent on squeezing the last of his grace out of his body by force. “Sam!” the angel gasps. “You’re choking me.”

The younger Winchester brother doesn’t let go entirely but the pressure returns to a bearable level. “I don’t know what to say,” Sam chokes out and Cas presses his hand against the larger man’s shaking back and orders. “Tell me you love me and then get out of my way. We have an appointment to keep.”

He feels more than hears Sam chuckle and with one last press Sam steps away. “I love you; you tell my brother I love him too.” Cas watches him walk on shaky legs slowly to where Lucifer leans in the doorway. 

He takes a deep breath before he focuses on his mate prone and still in the hospital bed before him; Dean’s slow decline finally leading them to oxygen tanks and beeping machines. Cas takes a great amount of pleasure in switching them all off reveling in the blessed silence that follows where the whole of the universe shrinks down to just the angel and his mate breathing in time. 

He slides in the bed beside Dean pillowing his head on his mate’s chest and sighing in relief. It’s here; it’s happening and Cas was unprepared for the burn of his own joy and sorrow; so much to look forward to and so much left behind. Dean’s heart beats and then slips and stutters. The angel envelopes them both in his wings and closes his eyes. He feels the moment Dean’s soul slips from his body and Cas exhales slowly relaxing his limbs and between one breath and the next slips free to follow his mate home. 

****

He wasn’t expecting Gabriel. Cas isn’t exactly sure why. But there his brother stands with his crooked grin and crooked wings as though it was yesterday that he went out for coffee and not decades ago. 

“Hey little bro,” Gabriel chuckles, “Took you long enough and here you come bringing friends.”

Cas gathers his older brother up and sobs his relief and happiness into the other angel’s neck until Gabriel all but pries him off and snorts, “Cry baby,” before beating on him with his wings. 

There’s a chuckle behind them that Cas would recognize anywhere. He turns on shaky legs and gasps with joy when he meets Dean’s gaze. 

“Hey baby,” Dean says and Cas is overwhelmed with what he sees. Gone are the wrinkles and blurry eyes, gone is the shaking and the slightly hunched back. It’s just Dean as Cas has always seen him; young and tall and as gorgeous as that first glimpse of him in the salvage yard all those long years ago. 

And Cas laughs as his mate flairs something up over both his shoulders. It’s as he always suspected; Dean Winchester looks good with wings. 

There are tears and laughter and Cas takes a long time poking and prodding Dean’s new appendages until his mate bats him away and then trips over one of his own wings. 

“You’re going to have to teach the loser how to fly,” Gabriel announces and Dean snorts in response. Cas chuckles leading Dean away to more empty space in the hopes of avoiding more embarrassment than absolutely necessary. 

Dean can’t navigate in the air worth a crap. It’s horrible and as they collapse in the grass and press close together Cas laughs and says, “Well, it’s a good thing we have eternity.” As Dean groans out, “Do I suck that bad?”

“Your brother is obnoxious,” Dean announces and Cas laughs, “Wait until he and Lucifer get together.” 

At his mate’s glare Cas questions, “What?”

“This is supposed to be heaven,” Dean growls. 

Cas shoves him with his wing. 

“Do you think we might go back again?” Dean ponders staring up at the sky.

“Start all over?” Cas asks. “Live out another life?”

At Dean’s nod Cas pulls his mate to him and leans in close whispering, “My soul will always find yours.”

Dean grins, “I know, but I want to be the one with the wings next time.”

And maybe he kisses him then; but I couldn’t see. Their wings were in the way.


	26. Outtake 1

Outtake number 1

Jesse and Adam are spending Saturday mornings with Ellen. Jesse’s not sure how it happened; probably some dumbass thing that Adam said. Their dad’s seem to think they need more of a feminine influence. He loves his dad’s but sometimes they’re just dumb. 

Really dumb.

Ellen is about as feminine as a male Rottweiler on steroids. She runs a bar. But every Saturday they ship over to her place for some sort of mom time. Jesse loves Ellen. She’s smart, frank, and affectionate. He’s never really had a mother so he enjoys hanging out with her. They’ve always been close. 

But now Ellen is acting really weird. Like out there weird. She’s making desserts at nine in the morning, trying to teach them how to bake. Which would be awesome because Jesse is ten and what ten year old wouldn’t love pie for breakfast? There’s just one problem; Ellen can’t cook. Jesse sometimes thinks the whole family would starve to death if it weren’t for Uncle Luc. That or he would be living off of take out and stuff you can shove in a microwave. He’s done it before. The only thing worse than not having pie for breakfast is having bad pie. 

It’s really bad too. 

He tries to eat it with a smile. You have to love her for trying. Adam doesn’t have as much sense. “Dude, this taste like the ass end of a donkey.” And that’s how Adam ends up on clean up duty while Jesse watches cartoons. 

My brother, the dork. 

So pie is a bust. The next week it’s cake. 

Then cookies,   
Then muffins,   
After that chocolate covered pretzels,   
Moving on to flower arraignments,   
Wrapping up with a detailed lesson on how to iron that literally went up in smoke,   
and finally horribly a trip through the female product isle at the grocery store that Jesse is pretty sure she orchestrated just because Adam complains constantly. That night he shoved a tampon up Adam’s nose and stuck maxi pads on the bottoms of both his feet. Adam was so pissed when dad posted the pictures on Facebook. It was awesome. 

That next Saturday, halfway through homemade pancakes that looked sort of like an alien vessel, Ellen lets out this long sigh. “I promised your dads I would spend time with you boys. But I hate this crap. Do you hate this crap?”

“God, yes.” Both boys respond. It’s such a relief to finally admit it. 

“Well then, I’m done with it.” Ellen wipes off her hands onto the kitchen towel. “What else can we do that’s more fun?”

Adam and Jesse look at each other. They’ve got nothing. What can they do here that they can’t already do at home?

“You ever shot a gun before?” Ellen has this wicked smile. Adam just looks at her with his mouth hanging open. 

Saturday mornings get a lot more fun after that. Jesse’s a darn good shot too. Riding home with their dad’s Adam turns to them and says “I love women.” Jesse couldn’t agree more. 

Women rule.


	27. Outtake 2

Outtake number 2

Chuck Shirley where have you been my whole life?

The guy is like syrup on pancakes. He’s sticky and sweet and clingy; just how Ash likes his men (or women.) He’s never been picky. But from the second he laid his eyes on Chuck Shirley at Sam’s graduation Ash had to have him. He had a goal and Ash is a goal oriented dude. 

“So what are you here for?” He’s trying to sound smooth. The guy looks a little jittery. 

“Dean’s my adopted brother so I’m part of the family.” Chuck’s voice is shaky and he keeps looking around like he’s expecting a bomb to go off at any minute. 

“Awesome. Sam’s my college roommate.” Ash smiles and hopes Chuck can feel the power coming off Dr. Love. 

“Yeah, um, we met last year when Dean and I helped Sam bring his stuff back to school.” Chuck is looking at him like he has lost his mind. 

Really? How drunk was I? Time for plan B.

“Wanna get a beer?” Ash waves his empty can around for emphasis.

“God, yes please.” Chuck is grabbing his arm and dragging him off to the cooler before Ash can blink. 

There about a six pack in when Ash declares he wants to see the garage. He’s not sure why at the time. It just seems like a good idea. Chuck hauls him off the grass and starts dragging him through the yard. But then they stop. 

“What’s going on?” Ash is trying to make it out but he had a few before he got here and things are a little blurry. 

“Sam’s parents are over there.” Chuck is staring, not even trying to hide it.

“OOOhhhh. Dude, they hate me. We should go say hello.” Ash is sure this is a great idea. What better way to release the tension than to show Sam’s parents how much fun they could be having?

He’s yanked to stop by Chuck. “Dean was really clear. He told me if I talked to Sam’s parents he would tie me to the back of the tow truck and drag me down the street.”

Chuck looks so serious. Ash is pretty sure Dean was bluffing but they guy is too cute to risk. “Off to the garage then.” Chuck smiles.

They end up in a pile in the grass beyond the garage; turns out Dean was smart enough to lock it. Chuck is a bendy mother fucker. Ash has seen yoga experts that weren’t that flexible. He’s tired and relaxed and needs a shower. It’s all good in his world. 

“So they ride around the country in a car and kill monsters?” Ash is fascinated by this book idea Chuck has.

“Yeah, they start out on a mission to find their dad but it gets more complicated after that. I have a five year arc planned out.” Chuck is waving his arms and talking extra fast.

“Sounds a little gay.” Ash is contemplative.

“What?! Dude their BROTHERS.” Chuck is bending over him with the disgusted horrified look on his face. 

“I get that part. But they sleep in the same room all the time, are always together, have no real relationships with anyone but each other. I’m just saying, it could look a little gay.” Not that it bothers Ash at all.

“Seriously man, look at my life. How could it NOT look a little gay? I assure you the homoerotic subtext is totally unintentional.” Chuck flops back onto the ground and heaves out a huge sigh. 

“Well maybe you could add another character in there. Like an angel or something so at least they won’t just be sleeping with each other.” Ash is a little wasted but it seems like a good idea. He curls up around Chuck and starts to drift off. 

Chuck grins up at the sky. “That’s an awesome idea. I could name him after Cas.”


	28. Outtake 3

Outtake number 3

My dear sweet Karen,

I don’t know why I’m writing this. You’ve been dead for almost fifteen years. I just got some things I want to tell you and I’m not sure what else to do. Things are changing a lot around here. The business is booming. I got more cars to work on and customers to help than I know what to do with. It’s like what you thought it would be when we opened the place. You always were too smart for your own good. 

The boys are doing so good, honey. Dean’s grown up into the kind of man you can count on and proud of. He’s my boy. He’s married; fell in love with this angel named Cas. A real angel; only Dean could find himself one of those. He’s only working at the Salvage yard part time now. He’s a damn good mechanic but turns out he’s a better artist. I set him up in the back lot and he spends most of his time banging out scrap metal into stuff that looks so good I can’t even believe he made it. Cas is good for him too. He loves Dean to pieces; looks at him the way you used to look at me. 

They have kids, sweetie, I’m a grandpa. 

Remember when we found out we couldn’t have kids? How we cried so hard that night thinking we’d never have a family? Bless you girl, for bringing home Dean and Chuck. Those two boys saved my soul after I lost you. Jesse and Adam remind me of the two of them when they were young. Adam is almost the spitting image of Dean. He’s just as much of an idjit too. All angry fire and hurt feelings. Jesse’s a little more like Chuck was. Soft spoken and shy. Thank God he doesn’t have the drug problem though. I never thought we would get Chucky straightened out. 

We found Sam. It took Dean and I years but we found him. He lives here now with us. Getting him back was like giving Dean back the lost part of his soul. They’re so good together. Sam’s married too. Got himself hooked up with an angel of his own. Luc just showed up here one day. Made himself a job and a home and then part of the family. I’ll tell you honey, that guy has saved me more money than I knew I was spending. He’s impressive. 

Chuck’s writing a book. It’s a mess but he keeps at it. He’s been off the drugs for six years now. Still drinks too much sometimes but you gotta be grateful for small favors. I think he and this ex-roommate of Sam’s from college are living together. I don’t know though, I don’t ask. That guy is a weird one but he’s better than Becky. I spent two years worried he was gonna knock that girl up. That and there’s only so many times you walk in on one of your kids with his pants pulled down before you start to want to hurt yourself. 

I’m not even gonna get into Pam, the blind mechanic, that showed up here last month. 

I miss you baby, everyday I miss you. I’m doing what you asked of me though. Nobody that comes here needing help ever gets turned away. Just like you always said. All because of your kind heart and sweet soul. Our family just keeps growing. I still love you. I hope you know that. 

I need to tell you something.

Karen, I know you told me that love just keeps going. I think I get what you meant when you said that now. Ellen’s a good woman. I think you’d like her; even though you got nothing in common. She can’t cook, cusses like a sailor, never wears a dress, out shoots and out drinks me. She’s got a daughter and a little grandbaby. She part of the family here. I don’t know where it came from. We’ve been friends since before her husband died. But we’re not just friends anymore. I haven’t told the boys yet. I wanted to tell you first. I love her, Karen. I’m gonna ask her to marry me. 

Who woulda thought an old gruff guy like me would get so lucky twice in one lifetime? 

I just wanted to tell you I’m doing ok. I’m happy. Thanks for looking out for this old man. 

I miss you sweet girl.

Bobby


	29. Outtake 4

Outtake number 4

Lucifer and Zachariah have never really been friends. 

They’re not enemies either.

They’re relationship has always sort of balanced carefully on the head of a tiny pin called need. 

For Lucifer to want to meet him for breakfast so he can discuss something in person; Zachariah knows he must need something very badly. 

Something he wants to keep private.

Zachariah is good with private; some people would say it’s his middle name.

“How are the waffles? I find the fruit salad delightful.” Zachariah says cheerfully.

Lucifer looks at him with a raised eyebrow of distaste and responds “You don’t care for the fruit salad nor does it matter to you what my waffle tastes like.”

Zachariah laughs “True, but you invited me here and I am relatively certain it was not to sit in silence and watch me eat.”

Lucifer snorts; Zachariah thinks it must be a habit that his acquaintance has picked up over the time spent with those unbearably human Winchesters. 

“I need you to find someone for me.” Lucifer states. As always he’s blunt, to the point.

“Human or Angelic?” Zachariah questions. Not that it really matters.

“Angelic. I have been trying to locate Castiel’s parents and have been having no luck. I was hoping you could aid me in their location.” Lucifer responds, his voice lowered.

Now this is fascinating.

“You have run out of angles? What makes you think I could do much better?” Zachariah queries. 

Lucifer sighs “Your contacts are, lets say, more intrusive than my own. I need to locate this family without them knowing they have been found. It was you or Crowley; and I know how much you would for him to come into town.”

Zachariah’s gut twists at the mention of Crowley’s name. They had been close once and the fall out of that closeness had been brutal. The last thing Zachariah needs is a constant reminder of what could have been his life coming to town and deciding to stay a while. 

Still, he hates being manipulated.

“I take it you have Castiel’s full participation on this endeavor?” Zachariah says.

Lucifer stares at him for along while before sliding a packet of paper over the table to him. Zachariah slips it into his jacket for later review. 

“He knows nothing about this,” Lucifer replies “and he had best still be ignorant of the undertaking when you’re finished with your digging.”

Zachariah knows a threat when he hears one. Lucifer’s intent is clear. 

“I’ll let you know in a week.” Zachariah states. 

Lucifer is gone without a goodbye; leaving Zachariah aware that the other angel is pained by having to ask for his aid. 

He smiles as he slides the last bit of pineapple off of his fork and into his mouth. 

This really is delicious.


	30. Outtake 5

Outtake number 5

“I just don’t get it. How did this happen?” Dean blurts out when they get home.

Cas is wearing such a what the fuck look that one of his wings goes up while the other one droops. 

“When two adults fall in love…” Cas starts.

“Dude,” Dean replies “Not funny.”

Ok, so maybe Dean is overreacting. But seriously you wake up some morning thinking everything is great with your life and then your adopted father tells you he’s getting married. 

“To Ellen?” Dean asks; his voice pitched high and dramatic.

“Yes Dean,” Cas responds in a dry almost disinterested tone “To Ellen. You remember Ellen right? Nice lady gives us a break from the boys every Saturday while she teaches them things.”

“Yeah, like shooting and who knows what else.” Dean busts out. 

Cas huffs; leans back on the bed and crosses his arms. That’s when Dean knows he’s in trouble. His mate has a low tolerance for bullshit and Dean’s aware that he’s pretty full of it right now.   
He deflates; slides down on the bed and nuzzles into his husbands wings. “It’s just…what am I supposed to call her?”

Cas threads his fingers through his mates short hair and does his best to project security and calmness through their link. “Why don’t you just keep calling her Ellen?” He suggests.

Dean groans low in his throat, his soul tossing with insecurity and worry. Cas sighs.

“Beloved,” he offers “this could be a happy time for you. Bobby is fulfilled and our family is growing. I know you don’t like change; but this is a good thing.”

“I know,” Dean mutters into Cas’s left wing. “I like Ellen. She’s amazing. I guess I just don’t know how I missed it. When did they get so close? You would think I would notice something like that.”

“This from the man who lived as my mate for almost a year before he kissed me.” Cas chuckles.

Dean shoves him off the bed and onto the floor.

When Cas kicks out trying to knock Dean over they get into a tussle. Dean ends up on top of Cas pinning him down with his body weight as Dean digs his fingers into both of Cas’s wings up under the feathers near the joints.

Cas howls with laughter and Dean doesn’t stop until he screams like a girl. 

They lay there piled together; still snorting out the occasional chuckle for a long time. Dean’s fingers carding through Cas’s wings as they sweep up and down Dean back. 

“He’s happy right?” Dean questions.

“Bobby?” Cas asks.

“Yeah,” Dean whispers “You could tell if he wasn’t right? It would show in his soul?”

Cas hums as he pulls his mate closer. “Yes love, Bobby soul is shining brighter everyday. You blessing in this union would give him even more comfort.”

Dean squirms in Cas’s arms finally sitting up and slumping against the side of their bed. “I fucked it up didn’t I? When I just sat there like and idiot.” Dean’s tone is sour.

“It’s nothing that can’t be smoothed over.” Cas responds and Dean can hear the hidden suggestion in his husbands words.

“I’ll be back.” Dean says and Cas smiles in pleasure at the kiss he receives before Dean goes.

Bobby’s poking a pile of paperwork with a pen when Dean finds him in the office. He looks up and say “Thought you went home for the day.”

Dean smiles and he’s aware he looks like a deer caught in the headlights. “We did. I forgot something.”

Bobby looks at him oddly, but that is nothing new. 

“Cas says you’re happy.” Dean blurts out and then wishes to God that he could erase the last day of his life and start over. Maybe he would be less of an idiot the second time around. 

“Dean, what the hell is wrong with you?” Bobby asks.

Dean looks at the man who has been the closest thing to a father he has ever known. He squares his shoulders and gathers his strength before he says “I acted like an ass. You told me you were getting married and all I could think about was Karen. She was the closest thing to a mom I ever had and I miss her. I don’t want anyone taking her place. Before you start; I know it’s stupid. I’m an idiot with the emotional maturity of a tadpole. But I love you and I want you to be happy. So if you’re happy then I am too. Ellen is a good woman and she’ll do right by you. So I just wanted you to know that I’m good. This is good. I’m sorry I didn’t just say that when you told us.”

Bobby snorts and then responds “Well you always were a little slow. I love you too you idjit. Now let’s act like we never had this talk please.”

Dean feels a million times lighter as he holds the door open for Bobby on the way out. 

He can’t resist it though “So when’s the wedding?” He singsongs.

Bobby trips him on the way down the steps before he answers “Last Thursday.”

“What?” Dean’s shocked.

“Not my fault you weren’t paying attention.” Bobby shrugs.

“No way man, you gotta have a wedding what about the kids?” Dean’s aware he sounds indignant.

“I’m sorry, where were we when you got married, Dean?” Bobby asks.

Ok, he’s got a point. Dean’s still mulling it over on the ride home. When he blurts out to Cas that the whole thing is a done deal Cas just chuckles and he starts stripping off Dean’s pants.

A few minutes later Dean can’t remember anything but his own last name and the feeling of wings stroking up and down his body. 

All and all, it’s been a pretty good day.


	31. Prompt 1: Mating Misunderstandings

The Wings Were in the Way Prompt 1

Their relationship has never really been easy.

Lucifer isn’t really an easy guy. 

Well he is; unless you want to mate with him Sam supposes. 

That’s really the problem; Sam wants to mate with him and all the books in the world don’t explain how to get your angel to mate with you when they don’t want to.

Sam’s pointedly not focusing on the ‘don’t want to’ part of the problem. He can’t even think about it that way. Lucifer has to want him; he wouldn’t be with him if he didn’t. 

Sam just must be doing it wrong. 

He’s read everything there is to read on the subject. He’s checked the internet and watched downloaded videos. 

Hell in a moment of total desperation he’s even talked to Dean and Cas. 

He’s not going to mention how that conversation went; but it is good to know that his brother and brother-in-law are on his side. 

Cas was clear that Sam shouldn’t push too hard or try to go to fast. 

But fuck; angels live a long ass time and Sam’s only human. If he moves at Lucifer’s pace he’ll be dead before they get the mating part.

So he implements plan B. He takes the subtle approach. 

The manual says that Angels often encourage increased courting with tiny gifts of intimate objects; things that are personal to each of the individuals participating. 

Sam stuffs his favorite ink pen into Lucifer’s desk at work.

Chuck walks off with it in less and three hours and then refuses to give it back.

Sam “borrows” one of Lucifer’s favorite books.

But then the angel just takes it back one night when he pulls the boring ass thing off of Sam’s chest after he fell asleep reading it.

Sam tries making him his favorite food. Now the thanks he gets for it is awesome. Sam really appreciates the kisses and groping. 

But it’s not what he needs. 

He goes on to plan C. 

It’s actually partially successful in that Sam learns Lucifer is actually a good dancer and that he doesn’t need to worry about leading. 

It’s much less awkward than Dean’s horrible attempt at it; being that Sam forgoes the whole ‘I have fake wings’ thing in favor of a modern simple slow dance that leaves them rocking together side to side and pressed in close. 

He thinks maybe he could stay like this all night.

Lucifer is very warm and Sam is feeling very loved. 

They share long, slow kisses in the moonlight of the backyard before the angel must pick up on something from him and Lucifer jerks away muttering some bullshit about working early tomorrow and needing to get to bed. 

Sam doesn’t even try to go to their room that night. He’s still in the backyard as dawn breaks over the horizon.

He tries poetry; he sucks at it. 

Sam does discover he can bust out a pretty good dirty limerick but he’s not sure it serves the purpose of public announcements of affection. 

He finally breaks down to plan E.

He goes out with Dean and gets totally shit faced. 

Sam’s not sure why this is plan E because it certainly isn’t helping him get married; but fuck it. He doesn’t want to think tonight and frankly by his fifth beer plan E is feeling pretty damn good.

Plan F pretty much just involves pouting. Sam’s good at it even though he hates to admit that. 

Lucifer has a low tolerance level for it though so it hurts probably more than it helps. 

“Are you ever planning on telling me what this is all about?” Lucifer asks as he slides down beside Sam on the sofa. 

“You should understand what it’s about,” Sam huffs.

“I know you think that but you’ve totally lost me Sam.” Lucifer’s damaged wing raises slightly in the air and Sam takes a deep breath before deciding to go with plan G.

He reaches out and grabs Lucifer’s wing. 

Everything stops and Sam watches as the angel turns wide eyes to him. 

“I want to groom your wings,” Sam says as clearly and directly as he can manage. 

“For what purpose?” Lucifer answers so quietly it’s almost just a breath passing through his lips. 

“Because I love you and I want to be your mate.” Sam’s not whining; he absolutely is not.

Lucifer slowly reaches up and tugs Sam’s hand away from his wing. He rubs his thumb over the inside of Sam’s wrist as he holds his hand in his lap saying “I love you as well. Can you not just be happy with what we have now?”

“No,” Sam growls out as he yanks his hand away. He’s angry and suddenly he understands that Lucifer hasn’t been oblivious. All of his offers have been subtly rejected. 

It only leaves him one option. 

He really doesn’t want me. 

He thought it might hurt more; Sam guessed that feeling your heart break would be agonizing. But really he’s just numb all over. 

He stands up on shaky legs and goes to flee. He needs to be anywhere but here right now. 

The only problem is the angel with the giant wingspan refusing to let him out of the room.

“Sit down Sam,” Lucifer commands in this voice that doesn’t leave him room to argue. 

He flops back down on the couch like he’s been shot. 

“I love you, I want you, and make no mistake you are going to be my mate,” Lucifer announces as he slides in close to Sam and wraps his hands around his upper arms. “But not right now; please love. I need you to understand that I’m not ready; that I’m afraid and I need time. But that it has nothing to do with you or how I feel about you.”

There’s a spark; a brush of grace that Sam’s never really felt before against what he guesses is his soul. Warmth that fills him up and wraps him up and tells him without words that everything is okay; that he is loved. 

That he’s good enough.

He smiles slowly. “If we call it a long engagement do I at least get to pet one of them sometimes?”

Lucifer chuckles as he drops to his knees and wraps his arms around Sam’s waist. 

He extends one of his wings slowly and carefully toward Sam and mutters into his lap “Only if you promise not to tell Dean and Cas.”

Sam is totally down with that idea. 

Plus his feathers feel fucking fantastic.


	32. Prompt 2: more from Max and Adam from The Wings Were in the Way pre them having kids.

“How did we fit all this shit in our dorm room?” Adam huffs as he hauls the last of the boxes out of the back of Max’s car and up the steps into their tiny new apartment. 

“I have no idea,” Max chuckles “It’s a small apartment though so maybe it’s just an illusion.”

Adam laughs and reaches out to ruffle his fingers through Max’s hair. When the other young man leans into the caress Adam’s hand slows to gentle stroking and then slides down to curve around the back of Max’s neck. 

“I’m so glad we did this,” he whispers and feels Max shiver at the tone of his voice. 

“Me too,” Max replies and Adam grins as his boyfriend stands and leans in close for a hesitant, careful kiss. 

They’ve been together since that horrible Christmas holiday five months ago when Adam had the bright idea to bring his girlfriend and his roommate home with him for the vacation. In his defense he hadn’t known at the time that Max was interested in him as anything other than a friend. 

Adam’s so glad he didn’t miss this chance. For all of his joking with his two dad’s about the whole family being gay he’s been happier with Max than he has ever been with a girl; than he thinks he could ever be with anyone. 

But they’ve been taking their time and moving slowly toward something serious. Max made it clear that he had some trust issues and that he needed time to settle into a relationship; Adam assured him that he wasn’t going anywhere. After all Adam has his own trust issues he’s still working on.

“Lets get some of this stuff unpacked,” Max suggests and Adam presses a kiss to the side of his face before tearing the tape off the first of what seems like a hundred boxes. 

Moving off campus for the fall semester had been the only thing they could think of to do. It was getting harder and harder to resist just dissolving their boundaries all together and start sleeping in the same bed every night. They both wanted to; but Max is a little old fashioned and he wanted to actually date Adam even though they were living together. So the months following the holiday were full of nights out at restaurants and hand holding, watching movies together curled up close and sweet, tender kisses good night. 

As much as temptation has never been something Adam was good at resisting he has to admit he’s enjoyed the slow burn of falling in love; and that’s exactly what he’s done. 

He’s head over heals for the guy that he once thought of as his weird ass little roommate; and he plans to tell Max that tonight when they crawl into the same bed together for the first time. 

Adam is done with sleeping alone. 

“I think this is your stuff,” Max comments from the other side of the room. He’s right too, so Adam hauls it back to the only bedroom and drops it off. 

Things go on like that for a while until they stop for pizza and for Adam to call his family and check in with the news that they got all the stuff moved in. “I know pop, I know you all would have come out to help but you didn’t need to.” There’s a pause and Max can’t help but smile as Adam rolls his eyes and makes a gesture with his hand that looks like and opening and closing mouth. “I know, I love you both too but we really just wanted to do this one our own, okay?”

When he finally manages to pry himself off the phone he turns to Max and says “I’m sorry; you know how they are.”

“I love your family,” Max chuckles and Adam reaches out to squeeze his hand. Max doesn’t talk a lot about his family and he never goes home or talks to them. There’s a lot of ugly, horrible, history there and Adam hopes he never has to interact with them at all. When he asked Max about it once he had been sickened when his friend had pulled up the back of shirt to show the circular burn marks from cigarettes and the slashes from what Max said was a broken ink pen going up both his sides. 

Max is unassuming; quiet and nervous, but he’s stronger than people know and Adam respects him so much for that. 

He nervous as they brush their teeth and turn out the lights in their halfway unpacked home before slipping into bed beside each other for the first time. Adam reaches out with clammy hands to pull Max into his arms and curl himself around the other man. 

“I love you,” Max blurts into the darkness and Adam busts out laughing. When Max elbows him hard in the side and tries to roll away Adam clings to him, hauls him back tight against him and chuckles “I was just about to tell you that; I’ve been planning it for weeks and then you just come out with it like that.”

“Oh,” Max whispers from where he’s starting to relax against Adam’s shoulder again. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not.” Adam strokes him gently up and down Max’s spine. “I love you Max.”

The kiss he gets in response is blistering in its intensity; Adam didn’t think Max knew how to kiss like that. It’s like the guy grows a bunch of extra arms or something and there are hands everywhere; in Adam’s hair, up under his t-shirt, tugging on his pajama pants and gripping the sheets next to his shoulder. 

This is way hotter than he thought it was going to be; but it is their first time and Adam’s not ashamed to admit that it’s his first time ever. He just needs to get Max to slow down. 

“Easy!” Adam mutters against his mouth and then takes a deep breath as Max relaxes and slides a little bit backward. “It’s a little fast for me.”

“I thought this was what you were planning?” Max asks and his voice sounds so confused.

“I was planning the ‘I love you’ part,” Adam answers “I hadn’t gotten any further.”

“So you’re not going to be disappointed if we don’t have sex tonight?” Max questions.

“No,” Adam answers honestly. “I was sort of thinking we might work up to that together.”

“Oh good,” Max slides his head back onto Adam’s shoulder and relaxes “I’m so tired and sore from moving I was afraid I’d die in the middle of it.”

Adam starts laughing and then can’t seem to get a grip on himself. He snorts and giggles until Max joins in and then presses happy kisses all over his boyfriends face. “It’s okay Max. We’ll get there; we’ve got our whole lives.” 

Adam is certain of that.


	33. Prompt 3: Lucifer and Gabriel meeting

The Wings were in the Way prompt 3

Michael had clung to him so tightly at the end that Lucifer had been afraid his brother might follow him across the veil. 

His desperation and grief had been palpable but they were nothing in comparison to Sam’s soul calling him forward; tugging him free. 

Lucifer isn’t vain; he would deny it loudly to anyone who dared ask. But it doesn’t stop him from twisting to check his damaged wing as soon as he gets his bearings and sobbing when he realizes that it’s no longer bent. 

He’s whole again. 

“Did you get lost or something?” Cas teases from behind him. “Sam’s been here for a while now looking for you.”

Lucifer turns and finds his chosen brother unchanged. Castiel glows with fulfillment in a way that makes him shine from the inside out. Lucifer extends his grace toward him and sighs with contentment at the long missed press of Cas’ grace in return. 

It feels like it’s been minutes, not the long twelve years Lucifer knows it to have been. 

“I’ve missed you,” he blurts almost ashamed at his outpouring of emotion. Cas hugs him tightly then and whispers into his ear “We’ve missed you too.”

As Cas steps away he sweeps his wings backwards and says “Let me take you to Sam.”

Lucifer is flying just behind the other angel when he first catches sight of his mate. Sam is tall and young and fit as Lucifer’s grace has always seen him; speaking to a smaller angel and laughing loudly at the man’s response. He gets a glimpse of something dark and large curved over Sam’s shoulders before Lucifer feels something grab both his wings and spin him in a large circle before tossing him across the sky. 

He spins to a stop and turns wide eyes to his brother-in-law.

“Dean,” he breathes; lost in the shape and form of the wings growing from the once human’s back. 

“Took you long enough Luc,” Dean chuckles “You know how hard it is to keep Sam entertained when he’s waiting on something this big? He tried the puppy eyes and then cycled through seven of his best bitch-faces before Gabriel finally got him distracted.”

“You’re flying,” Lucifer sputters.

“Did you get brain damaged in transit or something?” Dean asks and he slaps a hand on Lucifer’s forehead. “Can you get sick in Heaven?” 

“Oh shut up!” Lucifer blurts and shoves at Dean who sticks his tongue out and then grabs Cas’ hand. 

“Come on,” Dean orders “Sam’s waiting to show off his new toys.”

He doesn’t get more than a second to look at the new appendages Sam has before his mate is laughing and crying and smothering him with kisses until Lucifer is dizzy and his grace is swelling with so much joy he’s concerned it might burst. 

After long minutes of reunion he finally gets to trace shaking fingers over his mate’s huge, glossy black wings. Lucifer traces their edges and ruffles their feathers until Sam hums happily and leans into his touch like a giant cat getting scratched. 

“Can you use them?” He whispers. 

“Dean says I’ll have to learn how to fly,” Sam chuckles “Gabriel suggests I don’t let Dean or Cas teach me. Dean was either a really slow learner or Cas was a really bad teacher.”

“It was more likely both,” Lucifer snorts and he hears the angel who must certainly be Gabriel chuckle at the comment. 

Cas’ long gone and much missed sibling is very similar to his pictures. Lucifer extends a hand and is surprised to be pulled into a relaxed hug. 

“Thank you,” Gabriel whispers to him. “For looking after my brother for me.”

“He’s a lot of work,” Lucifer comments as they slide apart and Gabriel winks as he raises his voice to respond “So, I hear you’re quite the handful.”  
Lucifer twitches a wing and says “Rumor has it you force to be reckoned with in your time.”

“My time!” Gabriel feigns shock. “There is no shame in my game; I’ll have you know.”

“Really,” Lucifer smiles slowly and he hears Sam groan behind him. “Are you a betting man?”

“I could handle a wager,” Gabriel comments.

That’s how it starts. Cas, Dean and Sam run for cover but it doesn’t help much. 

Gabriel and Lucifer have decided a prank war is in order and they won’t be satisfied until one of them is declared the winner. Dean had been hoping Heaven had rules about that kind of thing. 

The worst part about it is that the two evil angels have a rule about pranking each other directly so they go after the other three instead. 

Cas gets caught in the first wave. They use the unreality of heaven to their advantages. His clothing get shrunk three sizes. Then he goes to get out of bed the next day and the blankets won’t let him up. 

Sam’s shoes get tied together for a solid week; every time he stands up he falls on his face. Then as if to add insult to injury when he hits the deck it’s always into something sticky or messy. 

Dean catches the worst of it because he attempts to fight back. Somehow while flying he gets stuck in a tree which then ends up decorated like Christmas. Every time he goes to eat his favorite burger the meat disappears. There was the incident with a broom, a can of whip cream, and a rubber band that will just never be spoken of again. 

When the dust finally settles Lucifer and Gabriel call it a draw; no one else in the family is particularly happy that they get along some well. 

“Are they speaking to us yet?” Gabriel asks as he hands over an apple to Lucifer in the park. 

“Nope.” Lucifer chuckles. “They’ll get over it eventually.”

“Yeah,” Gabriel smiles around a huge bite of fruit. “Besides; we got all the time in the world.”


	34. Prompt 4:  Jesse's life from "The Wings Were In The Way", when he's a teen and he meets his girl, or when he gets married. Something about him and how he fell in love.

The Wings Were in the Way Prompt 4

He doesn’t know when he stops thinking of her as an annoyance. He doesn’t remember when she grew up and became someone that he wanted to be around. Tara just shifted from a firecracker in pig tails to an independent woman over night. 

Or at least it seemed like over night for Jesse. His angelic lifespan makes time seem to move in a different way than for humans. He may only be half angel, but at twenty five he’s only just brushing the cusp of maturity. 

Though he suspects his fathers would tell him that in this family the men never grow up but so much. 

He had gone away to college and come back for holidays; every time startled by her beauty and the kindness he saw reflected in her soul. Tara has a quick wit and a sharp tongue, but she’s learned to be careful with those she holds dear. Jesse had for a long time been her favorite. But the gentle teasing of her jokes and the affectionate ruffling of his feathers with her narrow hands had turned from a welcome friendship, to a horrible wanting. 

He distracts himself with his studies and she calls less. It hurts, for some indefinable reason, down to his very grace. He comes home for her eighteenth birthday and meets her boyfriend. Jesse wants to say he seems like a nice guy; but the jealously that flares bright and hot at the base of his being won’t let him. He finds himself on the roof in his usual hiding spot as he waits for the night to end, for the weekend to finish, so he can leave. 

He isn’t expecting to have Lucifer drop onto the roof beside him. 

“Your grace is screaming,” Lucifer comments as he stretches his damaged wing, and settles down nearby. 

“It’s nothing,” Jesse tries so hard to sound reassuring. 

“Love is rarely nothing,” Lucifer chuckles, and then raises his eyebrows in reaction to Jesse’s dark glare. 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jesse hisses, and wishes desperately that he made up some excuse to avoid this party. 

“Don’t I?” Lucifer replies. “I think I loved your Uncle Sam before I met him. I lived in his room for a long time before he came home from school. When I met him, my grace poured out toward him like we had been friends for all of my lifetime, and it scared me so much that I almost ran.”

“What kept you here?” Jesse can’t stop himself from asking. 

“The idea that I could be loved in return,” Lucifer sighs. “Jesse, I know you’re not fully an angel, and that your senses haven’t ever been as sharp as mine or your father’s. But something you need to never forget about grace is: that it rarely reaches for something that doesn’t reach back just as desperately.” 

Lucifer gets to his feet and before he takes off says quietly, “For all of the time my daughter has been with us, you have been loved by her. You’ve been her playmate, her confidant, her protector; if it were possible that you might become something more for her, like her mate perhaps; then Sam and I wouldn’t be anything but pleased.”

Jesse watches him fly off but he can’t shake the thoughts from him mind. It haunts him for years. 

At the family New Year’s party two years later, he watches an independent and unattached Tara harass Adam endlessly, before turning to Max and showering him with affection. Come midnight she drags him out to the impromptu dance floor, and forces him into a slow, sliding lead. It’s all he can do to keep his feathers from shaking loose and dropping to the ground. 

She watches Adam and Max sway together a few feet away and suddenly whispers, “They are so in love.”

Jesse nods, “Yeah, they are.”

She turns to him then and he sees a determination in her eyes, which he knows can only mean that she’s preparing for a confrontation. “What would it take,” she asks, “for you to look at me that way?”

He stumbles, but she corrects for his misstep, and refuses to let go of his hand. “You don’t mean that,” he stammers.

Her eyes close for a moment, and when they open again there are unshed tears there. “Jesse,” she whispers, “I need you to make up your mind. My life time isn’t as long as yours and I don’t want to waste it.”

The song ends and she slips away. 

It takes him six months to decide that it was the last time he was ever going to let her walk away from him. 

He starts keeping in touch more. It’s playful and friendly, and she welcomes the attention as she keeps him apprised of all of the things she’s learning, and people she’s meeting. She dates; it’s painful. He never asks her to stop. If he’s blown his chance then he’s earned it by now; she couldn’t have been clearer about her wishes. 

When she turns twenty one he mails her a pendant he found at an antique store. She thanks him for it, but he never expects to see it again. They both come home for Christmas. Jesse laughing at his brother, now struggling with two little children of his own; Adam is a nervous father compared to Max who takes all the tipped over lamps, and dug through drawers in stride. 

He greets her at the door when she arrives home from school; looking to her left and right when he sees her standing on the doorstep. 

“Where’s your boyfriend?” he asks.

“What boyfriend?” she inquires. He sees it then, the necklace he sent her hanging around her neck. He touches it hesitantly and she mutters, “I never take it off.”

Jesse smiles, “I found him,” he teases.

“Who?” Tara sounds so confused.

“You’re boyfriend.” Jesse answers like it should be obvious. 

“Okay,” she says slowly like she thinks he lost his mind. “Where is he?”

“Right here,” he murmurs as he pulls her through the doorway and under the mistletoe. 

She laughs and kisses him like she’s been waiting her whole life for him to finally get this right. He lets his grace touch her soul, and is staggered by the love he finds shining there. 

When they separate she touches his face so gently, before she stomps on his foot hard and says loudly, “Took you long enough!”


	35. Prompt 5: a fluffy later Christmas.

With Peaceful Wings Unfurled

He watches the children running back and forth on the lawn behind their house with a smile covering his wrinkled face. 

So many little fingers and toes and wings that he’s gotten to see over his lifetime; his daughter and her children, and their children, the daughter’s of his brother’s older child now grown, grey in their hair, as their kids chase their grandchildren around. 

Sam Winchester is one lucky ass old man and he knows it. The aches and pains are worth it, feeling like he has to pee all the time, limping even with the use of his cane, not being able to perform the way he used to with his mate even though all of the passion of his soul is still aching for it. It’s all worth it. 

He wishes so badly Dean and Cas could have seen it too. Sam will tell them about it when he sees them again. 

It’s not going to be long now. 

“You’ve pulled off quite the shindig this year,” Michael chuckles as he joins Sam on the porch. 

“Glad you’re enjoying it,” Sam smiles up at his much younger looking brother-in-law. There’s so much love between them now. Sam has a hard time remembering his life before Michael was a part of it. “You should think about having it at your place next year.”

“We always have Christmas here,” Michael comments as he refuses to look at Sam, focusing on the yard instead. 

“I’m sorry Mike,” Sam whispers. “I’m sorry I have to take your brother away from you.”

“You gave him back to me Sam,” Michael answers softly. “I’ll be with you again one day.” 

Luc finds him later, wraps him up in still silver wings as he slides into Sam’s lap and lets him warm his frozen nose against his mate’s neck. Sam hates himself a little for the hot tears that slip from his eyes as Luc holds him. 

“What is it?” the angel whispers. 

“I’m just so weak, so human,” Sam snuffles. He’s not prepared for the belly laugh that Luc lets out. 

“You’re perfect,” he answers with a smile. “As perfect as you were the day I met you.”

“Maybe you’re the one getting senile,” Sam snorts even as he squeezes his mate gently. 

“There’s nothing wrong here Sam,” Luc sighs. “You are as you were meant to be. Things are happening as they were meant to happen. It doesn’t matter, where we go we go together.”

“If it weren’t for me you would have more time,” Sam replies as he nuzzles in against Luc’s neck. 

“There’s no such thing as time to me Sam,” Luc whispers. “There was only loneliness and hopelessness and fear and then there was you and the world was beautiful. I’m glad I won’t have to live in it once you’re gone.”

“This is our last Christmas,” Sam says, finally giving voice to the feeling that’s been building in his heart for many months now. 

“By spring I think,” Luc acknowledges with a brush against his cheek. “We’ll be reborn like the world; strong and young again.”

“It’s been a wonderful life with you,” Sam says as he lifts his head for a kiss. 

“Wait and see what the afterlife can do for us,” Luc smiles.


	36. Prompt 6: Sam/Lucifer many years into their relationship they celebrate Christmas.

Love and Joy Come to You

“When are the kids coming?” Sam asks as he cleans up the plates from dinner. 

“Tara said they will be in late tonight,” Luc answers as he leans back from the table to use his wing to brush along his mate’s ass as Sam walks away. 

There’s a chuckle from the sink before Sam swats at him playfully. “You’re insatiable,” he accuses. 

“This is becoming a problem now?” Lucifer asks with a raised eyebrow. 

“Yes dear,” Sam chuckles. “Twenty two years together and I have decided that you being interested in my ass is now an issue that we need to talk out.” 

“I’m just going to ignore you,” Lucifer warns as he used his wing to corral Sam into his lap at the table. Sam puts a token struggle at the wing handling but they both know it’s all for show. He settles happily in the angel’s lap with a sigh and immediately tips his head to let Lucifer nibble on his neck. 

“I want to give you your gift tonight before the kids get here,” Luc comments as Sam hums with pleasure as he nuzzles just under Sam’s ear. 

“Why?” Sam whispers. “Is it indecent?”

“It’s porn Sam,” Luc snorts and tickles his mate until Sam’s squirming. “You know me. I had Cas taken nudy pictures of me for you.”

“That would be hot,” Sam comments as he raises his eyebrows like he’s considering it. “But awkward.”

“Why would that be awkward?” Luc asks with no small amount of confusion. 

“Because I got you the same thing,” Sam laughs. “You should have seen Bobby’s face when Dean and I showed him the proofs.”

There’s a pause, Luc knows his family well and there’s real potential for this to either be a complete fabrication or the actually truth. “Sam,” he says carefully. “Are you pulling my wings?”

“You started it,” Sam says petulantly like a five year old. Luc just picks his mate up and starts carrying Sam to the bedroom. 

“The kids are coming,” Sam blurts as he realizes Luc’s intentions. 

“They have sex,” Luc assures him. 

*****

“You think they’re sleeping?” Jesse asks when he and Tara get to the house. 

She glares at him. “My fathers? Are you serious? It’s ten thirty and the lights are in their bedroom.”

“So you’re saying?” Jesse questions with his wing hovering up in the air. 

“THAT THEY’RE HAVING SEX!!!” Tara yells from the living room when they step inside. 

“We are NOT!” Sam barks from the bedroom. “We finished already.” 

“I’m going to my house,” Jesse abruptly announces as he turns on his heel and walks toward the door they just came in. 

“Your dads are over there with Adam and Max,” Tara warns. “Odds are good you’ll be walking in to the same thing.”

Jesse flinches at the thought. “Then can we just go to bed and deal with all of them in the morning?”

“Yes,” she answers with a grin and lets her mate drag her to her old bedroom. 

“I love being a parent,” Luc sighs from where his head is pillowed on Sam’s bare chest. “The opportunities for emotional scarring just never stop.”


End file.
